We are indeed called to love our brothers and sisters in Christ and to behave properly toward outsiders.
9Now as to the love of the brethren, you have no need for anyone to write to you, for you yourselves are taught by God to love one another; 10for indeed you do practice it toward all the brethren who are in all Macedonia. But we urge you, brethren, to excel still more, 11and to make it your ambition to lead a quiet life and attend to your own business and work with your hands, just as we commanded you, 12so that you will behave properly toward outsiders and not be in any need.
The mistake that many make in this regard is that this does not mean accept everyone as they are without calling them to repent of their sinful actions and attitudes. We are to repent and turn away from sin. To love others does not mean to accept their sin and let them remain in it. To love someone is to help them out of illness and suffering… and like it is to help them out of sin. YHWH has elaborated throughout the Bible in the law and the prophets as well as the teaching of Christ to show us how to love one another. It all points to repenting, to turning away from sin, and calling others to do likewise.
Even in 1 Thessalonians 4, before Paul addresses loving one another he addresses some areas of sin in which they need to avoid certain behavior.
1Finally then, brethren, we request and exhort you in the Lord Jesus, that as you received from us instruction as to how you ought to walk and please God (just as you actually do walk), that you excel still more. 2For you know what commandments we gave you by the authority of the Lord Jesus. 3For this is the will of God, your sanctification; that is, that you abstain from sexual immorality; 4that each of you know how to possess his own vessel in sanctification and honor, 5not in lustful passion, like the Gentiles who do not know God; 6and that no man transgress and defraud his brother in the matter because the Lord is the avenger in all these things, just as we also told you before and solemnly warned you. 7For God has not called us for the purpose of impurity, but in sanctification. 8So, he who rejects this is not rejecting man but the God who gives His Holy Spirit to you.
Paul first speaks to sanctification, being made holy and set apart for the purposes of YHWH.
Loving one another is the guidance, but we are called to do so YHWH’s way, not our own way. Just like with our own children, loving them sometimes means we tell them what to do and what not to do. YHWH does the same for us. We should share what He has taught us with others. This will help them far more than simply being kind to them and leaving them suffering in their own sin and separation from the Father, even if it is hard for them to hear. And yes… some will reject the message… but that is no reason to avoid our delivering the truth just as Yeshua did and the prophets before Him.
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