The sexual drive in men and women is given by God as part of who we are. Paul commented specifically in this regard in 1 Corinthians 7. It is good for a man or woman to be single and focused on God rather than married if that is their personal gifting from God. It will allow them to serve Him in a more focused way. However, God makes each of us different. For many, the drive for sex is wonderful inside the gift of marriage, but if they try to remain single, that same gift will instead lead to great temptation and potentially to immoral behavior.
Inside marriage, we must use this gift well as a way of bonding with our spouse. Sex or withholding of sex is not to be used as a “weapon” to get one’s own way or win an argument. This is plainly wrong. Marriages are strongest when sex is used to serve and bond with one another. Truly this helps two become one as God intends.
Once married, we should not divorce. It has always been God’s plan to have one man and one woman together in marriage. We are to choose carefully and prayerfully and then focus all our effort on serving each other and building / maintaining a strong marriage.
Teaching on Marriage
1Now concerning the things about which you wrote, it is good for a man not to touch a woman. 2But because of immoralities, each man is to have his own wife, and each woman is to have her own husband. 3The husband must fulfill his duty to his wife, and likewise also the wife to her husband. 4The wife does not have authority over her own body, but the husband does; and likewise also the husband does not have authority over his own body, but the wife does. 5Stop depriving one another, except by agreement for a time, so that you may devote yourselves to prayer, and come together again so that Satan will not tempt you because of your lack of self-control. 6But this I say by way of concession, not of command. 7Yet I wish that all men were even as I myself am. However, each man has his own gift from God, one in this manner, and another in that.
8But I say to the unmarried and to widows that it is good for them if they remain even as I. 9But if they do not have self-control, let them marry; for it is better to marry than to burn with passion.
10But to the married I give instructions, not I, but the Lord, that the wife should not leave her husband 11(but if she does leave, she must remain unmarried, or else be reconciled to her husband), and that the husband should not divorce his wife.
Take care not to overlook the Biblical view on sex drive. It can be a powerful bonding in strengthening a marriage. It is a gift from God and not something to be scorned or mocked. But it is also not something to be abused by using it outside of marriage.
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