Sometimes we make trouble for ourselves. Sometimes others make trouble with us for no good reason. As you read through 1 Chronicles 19 consider both the perspective of David and that of the Hanun.
David’s Messengers Abused
1Now it came about after this, that Nahash the king of the sons of Ammon died, and his son became king in his place. 2Then David said, “I will show kindness to Hanun the son of Nahash, because his father showed kindness to me.” So David sent messengers to console him concerning his father. And David’s servants came into the land of the sons of Ammon to Hanun to console him. 3But the princes of the sons of Ammon said to Hanun, “Do you think that David is honoring your father, in that he has sent comforters to you? Have not his servants come to you to search and to overthrow and to spy out the land?” 4So Hanun took David’s servants and shaved them and cut off their garments in the middle as far as their hips, and sent them away. 5Then certain persons went and told David about the men. And he sent to meet them, for the men were greatly humiliated. And the king said, “Stay at Jericho until your beards grow, and then return.”
6When the sons of Ammon saw that they had made themselves odious to David, Hanun and the sons of Ammon sent 1,000 talents of silver to hire for themselves chariots and horsemen from Mesopotamia, from Aram-maacah and from Zobah. 7So they hired for themselves 32,000 chariots, and the king of Maacah and his people, who came and camped before Medeba. And the sons of Ammon gathered together from their cities and came to battle. 8When David heard of it, he sent Joab and all the army, the mighty men. 9The sons of Ammon came out and drew up in battle array at the entrance of the city, and the kings who had come were by themselves in the field.
Ammon and Aram Defeated
10Now when Joab saw that the battle was set against him in front and in the rear, he selected from all the choice men of Israel and they arrayed themselves against the Arameans. 11But the remainder of the people he placed in the hand of Abshai his brother; and they arrayed themselves against the sons of Ammon. 12He said, “If the Arameans are too strong for me, then you shall help me; but if the sons of Ammon are too strong for you, then I will help you. 13“Be strong, and let us show ourselves courageous for the sake of our people and for the cities of our God; and may the LORD do what is good in His sight.” 14So Joab and the people who were with him drew near to the battle against the Arameans, and they fled before him. 15When the sons of Ammon saw that the Arameans fled, they also fled before Abshai his brother and entered the city. Then Joab came to Jerusalem.
16When the Arameans saw that they had been defeated by Israel, they sent messengers and brought out the Arameans who were beyond the River, with Shophach the commander of the army of Hadadezer leading them. 17When it was told David, he gathered all Israel together and crossed the Jordan, and came upon them and drew up in formation against them. And when David drew up in battle array against the Arameans, they fought against him. 18The Arameans fled before Israel, and David killed of the Arameans 7,000 charioteers and 40,000 foot soldiers, and put to death Shophach the commander of the army. 19So when the servants of Hadadezer saw that they were defeated by Israel, they made peace with David and served him. Thus the Arameans were not willing to help the sons of Ammon anymore.
Consider this as more than just an old historical record. From David’s perspective, he acted with good intent and was met with uncalled for hostility and aggression. Hanun and his advisors made trouble for David for no good reason. They did not trust him and made big assumptions with no data to back it up. They created a war while in theory trying to defend against one. From Hanun’s perspective, he made trouble for himself. His lack of trust and his listening to bad advice led him to make bad choices that go himself into trouble. He could have simply accepted the advisors, showed them nothing and sent them home. He chose to humiliate them. That was antagonistic and not necessary. It was not his only option if he did not trust David.
Are there any times in your life in which you have been antagonistic and started conflict with someone, even a spouse or parent or child or boss, where one was not called for? Did it ever help? I can see examples in which someone comes to help you and perhaps even gives you advice. Lacking trust you may be sarcastic or dismissive rather than simply listening. Why not just listen politely. You can choose later whether or not to follow that advice. It is usually easy to avoid by choosing to even just be cautious or guarded but not antagonistic and aggressive. Ask Yahweh for help.
When someone creates trouble for you, you are left with the option to respond and not perhaps to avoid the whole thing. If it is literally war or physical attack, you will have to defend vigorously. Fortunately for most of us it is usually not battle. If it is someone arguing or creating strife, we often have the choice of how we respond. Do we engage fully and escalate the conflict? Or do we deflect the conflict and de-escalate by remaining calm and not striking back? Which type of response did you find most helpful in your life in the past? I will say that my marriage goes a whole lot smoother when one of us is having a hard time if the other is actively de-escalating and not ramping up harsh words as a reply. I think that is the case generally.
If you find yourself in either case, seek Yahweh’s help. Look to Him.
I invite you to pray with me:
Father, please help me to not create trouble for myself and others for no good reason. Help me to be wise and thoughtful in my actions and attitudes. When others create conflict with me, help me respond productively and appropriately. Amen.
Shalom
Devotion by John in service to Christ
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