What is a virtuous wife? By what standard do we judge? Many people groups have identified different “virtues” over time. We certainly should take care to not just measure against our own preferences and call that virtuous. Similarly, we should not just accept culture’s definition of a virtuous wife. That standard changes over time. We should look to Yahweh and the scriptures He provided.
For example, In Proverbs 31:10-31 we are shown the picture of what it means to be a virtuous woman.
Description of a Worthy Woman
10An excellent wife, who can find?
For her worth is far above jewels.
11The heart of her husband trusts in her,
And he will have no lack of gain.
12She does him good and not evil
All the days of her life.
13She looks for wool and flax
And works with her hands in delight.
14She is like merchant ships;
She brings her food from afar.
15She rises also while it is still night
And gives food to her household
And portions to her maidens.
16She considers a field and buys it;
From her earnings she plants a vineyard.
17She girds herself with strength
And makes her arms strong.
18She senses that her gain is good;
Her lamp does not go out at night.
19She stretches out her hands to the distaff,
And her hands grasp the spindle.
20She extends her hand to the poor,
And she stretches out her hands to the needy.
21She is not afraid of the snow for her household,
For all her household are clothed with scarlet.
22She makes coverings for herself;
Her clothing is fine linen and purple.
23Her husband is known in the gates,
When he sits among the elders of the land.
24She makes linen garments and sells them,
And supplies belts to the tradesmen.
25Strength and dignity are her clothing,
And she smiles at the future.
26She opens her mouth in wisdom,
And the teaching of kindness is on her tongue.
27She looks well to the ways of her household,
And does not eat the bread of idleness.
28Her children rise up and bless her;
Her husband also, and he praises her, saying:
29“Many daughters have done nobly,
But you excel them all.”
30Charm is deceitful and beauty is vain,
But a woman who fears the LORD, she shall be praised.
31Give her the product of her hands,
And let her works praise her in the gates.
It is an amazing and timeless list. Some key principles summarized:
- A virtuous woman respects and supports her husband. She is a very present help, not a hindrance. Her husband can trust her.
- A virtuous woman is an energetic, strong, and hard worker. She runs her household in a godly way. This is not an easy task!
- A virtuous woman helps the poor and needy. Actively serves God in the home and with outreach outside the home.
- A virtuous woman trusts God and diligently plans ahead. She has no fear of the future.
- A virtuous woman speaks and gives instruction with wisdom and kindness.
- A virtuous woman raises her children in a godly way. They stand and bless her.
- A virtuous woman fears the Lord. She seeks to understand and live out God’s will with all her heart, soul, mind and strength.
- A virtuous woman should be rewarded and praised! Do not forget this one husbands and fathers of girls.
Women… do not be discouraged. God does set the bar high and challenges us to strive toward it rather than rationalize why we should lower the bar or why today it does not apply. But He knows we are not perfect. It is a goal to work toward, a journey that will never be completed but transforms your life on the way. Start by taking it in pieces one day at a time. Link up with other Christian women who share a passion to honor God in this way. (Check out links to two online women’s ministries at bottom of post.)
Husbands… we don’t get off easy either. Ephesians 5:25 calls us to love our wives as Christ loved the church. He gave up His life for the church and we are to give our lives to serve and lead the ones we love. Measuring up to Jesus Christ is a target we can never achieve, but we are called to work toward it!
Proverbs 31 Ministries and a virtuous woman.org are two separate ministries with an online presence that help women in the midst of their busy lives grow toward becoming a Proverbs 31 woman.
I invite you to pray with me:
Father, thank You for helping us to have clear record of Your standards. Thank You for raising up virtuous women who want to strive to live according to Your instructions. Raise up more and more virtuous women to live to Your standard for excellent wives. Help daughters to learn from their example. Help husbands to appreciate and support them! Help the husbands also live up to Your standard in Ephesians 5:25 for them as well. In this way, help Your people be set apart from others and be blessed and joyful.
Shalom
Devotion by John in service to Christ
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