Category Archives: Parenting

Children, Consequences of Sin, Disobeying, Rebelling Against, Ignoring God, Family, Parenting, Righteousness / Serving God

“What Good Is My Birthright To Me Now?

We see in Genesis 25:27-34 some of the damage inflicted within a family when parents fail. Isaac and Rebekah chose favorites, perhaps unintentionally, but favorites none the less. When parents do this it creates a significant divide within the family instead of uniting the family together. Instead, as parents, we are to love each child for the unique gifts and personality God has given them… following the example of our Creator, who loves each of us despite our differences.

27 As the boys grew up, Esau became a skillful hunter. He was an outdoorsman, but Jacob had a quiet temperament, preferring to stay at home. 28 Isaac loved Esau because he enjoyed eating the wild game Esau brought home, but Rebekah loved Jacob.

29 One day when Jacob was cooking some stew, Esau arrived home from the wilderness exhausted and hungry. 30 Esau said to Jacob, “I’m starved! Give me some of that red stew!” (This is how Esau got his other name, Edom, which means “red.”)

31 “All right,” Jacob replied, “but trade me your rights as the firstborn son.”

32 “Look, I’m dying of starvation!” said Esau. “What good is my birthright to me now?”

33 But Jacob said, “First you must swear that your birthright is mine.” So Esau swore an oath, thereby selling all his rights as the firstborn to his brother, Jacob.

34 Then Jacob gave Esau some bread and lentil stew. Esau ate the meal, then got up and left. He showed contempt for his rights as the firstborn.

As we continue to read in scripture we will later read in Genesis 27 how Jacob tricks Isaac into giving him the blessing intended for Esau. However, we see clearly in Genesis 25 that Esau showed contempt for his rights as the firstborn and agreed foolishly to give them to Isaac in trade for… yes… one bowl of stew.

There is much we could discuss about the dysfunctional behavior of both Isaac and Esau within this family… and Isaac and Rebekah as well. It is disappointing to see the grandchildren  of Abraham acting so poorly and acting so clearly on their internal sin nature instead of turning to God and following His instruction.

It is a clear reminder for each of us to focus as parents on the importance of following God’s instruction and example in loving and raising our children. We must actively seek God and parent well. Children will not raise themselves in a godly manner. Sometimes parenting can be a very difficult task to do in a righteous and thorough manner. It is not for the lazy or faint of heart.

Join me in praying for Christian parents around the world to raise their children in a righteous manner and help lead them to God. If you are a parent or grandparent,  seek ways you can help raise the next generations. There are many in the world who will try to lead them astray and they must be well rooted in the Bible and in Jesus Christ as the only path to knowing God.

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Faith / Trusting God, Hearing from God, Marriage, Obeying God, Parenting, Prayer, Righteousness / Serving God

Abraham and His Servant Rely on God

Genesis 24 shows us what remains important to Abraham in his old age… planning for his son to have a godly bride and continuing to trust God. Abraham was focused on his son marrying someone of his own faith, instead of local women who worshipped false gods, and in trusting God’s promise that he should remain in the land that God promised to give to his descendants.  Abraham’s focus remains on serving and trusting God even as a very old man. He does not choose to stop following God’s instruction.

24 Abraham was now a very old man, and the Lord had blessed him in every way. 2 One day Abraham said to his oldest servant, the man in charge of his household, “Take an oath by putting your hand under my thigh. 3 Swear by the Lord, the God of heaven and earth, that you will not allow my son to marry one of these local Canaanite women. 4 Go instead to my homeland, to my relatives, and find a wife there for my son Isaac.”

5 The servant asked, “But what if I can’t find a young woman who is willing to travel so far from home? Should I then take Isaac there to live among your relatives in the land you came from?”

6 “No!” Abraham responded. “Be careful never to take my son there. 7 For the Lord, the God of heaven, who took me from my father’s house and my native land, solemnly promised to give this land to my descendants.[a] He will send his angel ahead of you, and he will see to it that you find a wife there for my son. 8 If she is unwilling to come back with you, then you are free from this oath of mine. But under no circumstances are you to take my son there.”

9 So the servant took an oath by putting his hand under the thigh of his master, Abraham. He swore to follow Abraham’s instructions. 10 Then he loaded ten of Abraham’s camels with all kinds of expensive gifts from his master, and he traveled to distant Aram-naharaim. There he went to the town where Abraham’s brother Nahor had settled. 11 He made the camels kneel beside a well just outside the town. It was evening, and the women were coming out to draw water.

12 “O Lord, God of my master, Abraham,” he prayed. “Please give me success today, and show unfailing love to my master, Abraham. 13 See, I am standing here beside this spring, and the young women of the town are coming out to draw water. 14 This is my request. I will ask one of them, ‘Please give me a drink from your jug.’ If she says, ‘Yes, have a drink, and I will water your camels, too!’—let her be the one you have selected as Isaac’s wife. This is how I will know that you have shown unfailing love to my master.”

15 Before he had finished praying, he saw a young woman named Rebekah coming out with her water jug on her shoulder. She was the daughter of Bethuel, who was the son of Abraham’s brother Nahor and his wife, Milcah. 16 Rebekah was very beautiful and old enough to be married, but she was still a virgin. She went down to the spring, filled her jug, and came up again. 17 Running over to her, the servant said, “Please give me a little drink of water from your jug.”

18 “Yes, my lord,” she answered, “have a drink.” And she quickly lowered her jug from her shoulder and gave him a drink. 19 When she had given him a drink, she said, “I’ll draw water for your camels, too, until they have had enough to drink.” 20 So she quickly emptied her jug into the watering trough and ran back to the well to draw water for all his camels.

21 The servant watched her in silence, wondering whether or not the Lord had given him success in his mission. 22 Then at last, when the camels had finished drinking, he took out a gold ring for her nose and two large gold bracelets[b] for her wrists.

23 “Whose daughter are you?” he asked. “And please tell me, would your father have any room to put us up for the night?”

24 “I am the daughter of Bethuel,” she replied. “My grandparents are Nahor and Milcah. 25 Yes, we have plenty of straw and feed for the camels, and we have room for guests.”

26 The man bowed low and worshiped the Lord. 27 “Praise the Lord, the God of my master, Abraham,” he said. “The Lord has shown unfailing love and faithfulness to my master, for he has led me straight to my master’s relatives.”

28 The young woman ran home to tell her family everything that had happened. 29 Now Rebekah had a brother named Laban, who ran out to meet the man at the spring. 30 He had seen the nose-ring and the bracelets on his sister’s wrists, and had heard Rebekah tell what the man had said. So he rushed out to the spring, where the man was still standing beside his camels. 31 Laban said to him, “Come and stay with us, you who are blessed by the Lord! Why are you standing here outside the town when I have a room all ready for you and a place prepared for the camels?”

32 So the man went home with Laban, and Laban unloaded the camels, gave him straw for their bedding, fed them, and provided water for the man and the camel drivers to wash their feet. 33 Then food was served. But Abraham’s servant said, “I don’t want to eat until I have told you why I have come.”

“All right,” Laban said, “tell us.”

34 “I am Abraham’s servant,” he explained. 35 “And the Lord has greatly blessed my master; he has become a wealthy man. The Lord has given him flocks of sheep and goats, herds of cattle, a fortune in silver and gold, and many male and female servants and camels and donkeys.

36 “When Sarah, my master’s wife, was very old, she gave birth to my master’s son, and my master has given him everything he owns. 37 And my master made me take an oath. He said, ‘Do not allow my son to marry one of these local Canaanite women. 38 Go instead to my father’s house, to my relatives, and find a wife there for my son.’

39 “But I said to my master, ‘What if I can’t find a young woman who is willing to go back with me?’ 40 He responded, ‘The Lord, in whose presence I have lived, will send his angel with you and will make your mission successful. Yes, you must find a wife for my son from among my relatives, from my father’s family. 41 Then you will have fulfilled your obligation. But if you go to my relatives and they refuse to let her go with you, you will be free from my oath.’

42 “So today when I came to the spring, I prayed this prayer: ‘O Lord, God of my master, Abraham, please give me success on this mission. 43 See, I am standing here beside this spring. This is my request. When a young woman comes to draw water, I will say to her, “Please give me a little drink of water from your jug.” 44 If she says, “Yes, have a drink, and I will draw water for your camels, too,” let her be the one you have selected to be the wife of my master’s son.’

45 “Before I had finished praying in my heart, I saw Rebekah coming out with her water jug on her shoulder. She went down to the spring and drew water. So I said to her, ‘Please give me a drink.’ 46 She quickly lowered her jug from her shoulder and said, ‘Yes, have a drink, and I will water your camels, too!’ So I drank, and then she watered the camels.

47 “Then I asked, ‘Whose daughter are you?’ She replied, ‘I am the daughter of Bethuel, and my grandparents are Nahor and Milcah.’ So I put the ring on her nose, and the bracelets on her wrists.

48 “Then I bowed low and worshiped the Lord. I praised the Lord, the God of my master, Abraham, because he had led me straight to my master’s niece to be his son’s wife. 49 So tell me—will you or won’t you show unfailing love and faithfulness to my master? Please tell me yes or no, and then I’ll know what to do next.”

50 Then Laban and Bethuel replied, “The Lord has obviously brought you here, so there is nothing we can say. 51 Here is Rebekah; take her and go. Yes, let her be the wife of your master’s son, as the Lord has directed.”

52 When Abraham’s servant heard their answer, he bowed down to the ground and worshiped the Lord. 53 Then he brought out silver and gold jewelry and clothing and presented them to Rebekah. He also gave expensive presents to her brother and mother. 54 Then they ate their meal, and the servant and the men with him stayed there overnight.

But early the next morning, Abraham’s servant said, “Send me back to my master.”

55 “But we want Rebekah to stay with us at least ten days,” her brother and mother said. “Then she can go.”

56 But he said, “Don’t delay me. The Lord has made my mission successful; now send me back so I can return to my master.”

57 “Well,” they said, “we’ll call Rebekah and ask her what she thinks.” 58 So they called Rebekah. “Are you willing to go with this man?” they asked her.

And she replied, “Yes, I will go.”

59 So they said good-bye to Rebekah and sent her away with Abraham’s servant and his men. The woman who had been Rebekah’s childhood nurse went along with her. 60 They gave her this blessing as she parted:

“Our sister, may you become
    the mother of many millions!
May your descendants be strong
    and conquer the cities of their enemies.”

61 Then Rebekah and her servant girls mounted the camels and followed the man. So Abraham’s servant took Rebekah and went on his way.

62 Meanwhile, Isaac, whose home was in the Negev, had returned from Beer-lahai-roi. 63 One evening as he was walking and meditating in the fields, he looked up and saw the camels coming. 64 When Rebekah looked up and saw Isaac, she quickly dismounted from her camel. 65 “Who is that man walking through the fields to meet us?” she asked the servant.

And he replied, “It is my master.” So Rebekah covered her face with her veil. 66 Then the servant told Isaac everything he had done.

67 And Isaac brought Rebekah into his mother Sarah’s tent, and she became his wife. He loved her deeply, and she was a special comfort to him after the death of his mother.

A few key highlights in this important scripture we should consider applying in our own lives:

  • Even at the end of his life, Abraham, a man declared righteous because of his faith, focuses on submitting to God. He looks ahead to important things that need to be resolved before he dies. He prepares to help the next generation succeed in submitting to and serving God. There are two important aspects of this highlighted in this passage… marrying a godly woman even if it seems hard to find one and choosing to live in the land that God told him his descendants would inherit.
  • The servant prayed to God for help finding the bride for Isaac. This step is important and we should encourage everyone to submit their choice of spouse to God and ask for His help, and then wait for His answer.
  • The test that the servant uses is actually a good indicator of character. He was not only looking for water for himself, which is relatively easy, but for his camels… which is a lot of work. They drink a lot after a long journey. Note he did not ask her to water his camels, but relied on her offering.
  • The servant also recognized confirmation from God for his prayer. The timing of when Rebekah showed up, fulfillment of the original test, and then the fact that she was related to Abraham’s family… which was Abraham’s request.
  • The servant stops to worship, praise, and thank God for help.
  • When he shares his testimony with Rebekah’s family, the servant does not just say “God told me Rebekah is to be Isaac’s wife.” Instead he shares the full detail of the testimony with them… to the glory of God.

We can learn much through the life of Abraham. Yes, he made mistakes, but he was a man of great faith. Praise God we have record of His life to study and learn from. I am greatly encouraged to see how God can use us, even though we still have flaws and make mistakes.

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Character of God, Consequences of Sin, Family, Hearing from God, Marriage, Obeying God, Parenting

Abraham Seeks God For Family Troubles

Genesis 21:8-21 reminds us that there are real, tangible consequences of our mistakes but also shows us how God can help us through these difficulties.

Ishmael was the result of a poor choice made by Sarah and Abraham in an effort to “help God” fulfill His promise to provide generations of offspring through Abraham.

8 When Isaac grew up and was about to be weaned, Abraham prepared a huge feast to celebrate the occasion. 9 But Sarah saw Ishmael—the son of Abraham and her Egyptian servant Hagar—making fun of her son, Isaac.[b] 10 So she turned to Abraham and demanded, “Get rid of that slave woman and her son. He is not going to share the inheritance with my son, Isaac. I won’t have it!”

11 This upset Abraham very much because Ishmael was his son. 12 But God told Abraham, “Do not be upset over the boy and your servant. Do whatever Sarah tells you, for Isaac is the son through whom your descendants will be counted. 13 But I will also make a nation of the descendants of Hagar’s son because he is your son, too.”

14 So Abraham got up early the next morning, prepared food and a container of water, and strapped them on Hagar’s shoulders. Then he sent her away with their son, and she wandered aimlessly in the wilderness of Beersheba.

15 When the water was gone, she put the boy in the shade of a bush. 16 Then she went and sat down by herself about a hundred yards[c] away. “I don’t want to watch the boy die,” she said, as she burst into tears.

17 But God heard the boy crying, and the angel of God called to Hagar from heaven, “Hagar, what’s wrong? Do not be afraid! God has heard the boy crying as he lies there. 18 Go to him and comfort him, for I will make a great nation from his descendants.”

19 Then God opened Hagar’s eyes, and she saw a well full of water. She quickly filled her water container and gave the boy a drink.

20 And God was with the boy as he grew up in the wilderness. He became a skillful archer, 21 and he settled in the wilderness of Paran. His mother arranged for him to marry a woman from the land of Egypt.

The mistake of Abraham having a child with Hagar, who was not his wife, had very tangible consequences for all involved. Sarah and Hagar developed division and bitterness toward one another. Abraham was forced to deal with division within his household that was very destructive and Ishmael was caught up in the middle of it all.

When Abraham was faced with solving this challenging problem, he turned to God. God, in His grace, gave specific guidance for resolution. We can have debate about what we would have told Abraham to do, but there is no debating that Abraham turned to God, God answered, and Abraham immediately obeyed.

God told Abraham that He would take care of Ishmael and He did. God also reached out to Hagar when she was crying out in need in order to comfort and encourage her and to fulfill His commitment to Abraham.

We should be encouraged that we can turn to God for help even in personal struggles or conflict within our family. He cares about each of us that much. However, when He provides a clear answer for how to resolve it… we should follow His instruction quickly.

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Children, Consequences of Sin, Family, Hearing from God, Obeying God, Parenting

Seek God for Decisions in Your Life

Genesis 19:30-38 shows us a dramatic example of the foolishness of people when we try to solve our problems without God and without even working together as a family.

30 Afterward Lot left Zoar because he was afraid of the people there, and he went to live in a cave in the mountains with his two daughters. 31 One day the older daughter said to her sister, “There are no men left anywhere in this entire area, so we can’t get married like everyone else. And our father will soon be too old to have children. 32 Come, let’s get him drunk with wine, and then we will have sex with him. That way we will preserve our family line through our father.”

33 So that night they got him drunk with wine, and the older daughter went in and had intercourse with her father. He was unaware of her lying down or getting up again.

34 The next morning the older daughter said to her younger sister, “I had sex with our father last night. Let’s get him drunk with wine again tonight, and you go in and have sex with him. That way we will preserve our family line through our father.” 35 So that night they got him drunk with wine again, and the younger daughter went in and had intercourse with him. As before, he was unaware of her lying down or getting up again.

36 As a result, both of Lot’s daughters became pregnant by their own father. 37 When the older daughter gave birth to a son, she named him Moab.[b] He became the ancestor of the nation now known as the Moabites. 38 When the younger daughter gave birth to a son, she named him Ben-ammi.[c] He became the ancestor of the nation now known as the Ammonites.

Once again we gain insight into Lot and how poorly he led his family to know God and to follow God. They were likely influenced by their time in Sodom and a lack of strong godly leadership from their father.

Lot’s daughters identified a problem that was of great concern to them. They decided it was better to try to solve it on their own than to seek God or even discuss it with their father. They end up with a foolish solution. They still have a lack of men for more children or a community in which to raise their children.  The Moabites and Ammonites as a culture continued the way they were started… far from God. They later become a thorn in the side for Israel at times.

It seems obvious that Lot’s daughters did not know how to relate to God. They did not seek His help and instruction when confronting a big issue in their lives. Further, they did not even approach their father to discuss it. Granted, Lot did not have a strong track record for godly decision making… but perhaps he could have sought out Abraham if confronted by this situation.

Of course, one could also ask why Lot was not paying enough attention to his daughters to notice their concern and ask about it. There is not much detail provided, but it seems the family was far from God and did not have good communication within the family to work together to solve problems.

Although this type of incestuous relationship is not common, the world is full of young women and men making foolish choices about sex outside marriage, about adultery after marriage, about marrying the wrong person because they are in a hurry. Some feel a “biological clock ticking” and feel pressure to hurry and marry and have children. They move quickly and marry the wrong person. Some just do not understand what real love is and respond to hormones that may lead them to feel “attracted” to someone. That is not love. Love is defined in 1 Corinthians 13:1-7.

It is important to raise children to know and serve God and to seek Him in these situations. Further, it is important to lead your children in such a way that they can approach you about these personal issues and discuss them so you can help as a parent. Don’t wait until they are teenagers, start when they are very young.  Encourage them to make decisions based on God’s word, prayer, and consulting their parents. Respect their concerns and issues at an early age and give them the opportunity to discuss anything with you as their parent. Teach them you are a resource to help them.

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