Just to be clear, this is not a biblical parable, but one based on biblical teaching and one that is true many times over.

There is a story about a young man who was happily married. He loved his wife very much. To show it, he learned her favorite flowers, and favorite candy, learned how to help around the house the way that she liked, and he even bought her the style of clothes she liked to wear. Of course, holiday celebrations were no exception. He honored her in the ways that she told him she appreciated and she knew that he loved her. They were married for many years and many of their ways became strong habits and traditions.

After a time, his wife grew ill and died. He truly missed her. He grieved for a time and eventually remarried.

His second wife did not like the same things or do things the same way as his first wife. He would tell his new wife how much he loved her but than continue in the old habits and traditions he created for his first wife, even buying the same style of clothing for her and giving her the flowers that his first wife enjoyed instead of the ones she liked. His second wife asked him gently many times to change how he tried to honor her and explained what she liked and did not like. Despite her many efforts to communicate clearly, the man refused to change from his habits and traditions to learn to show love and honor his second wife the way she appreciated and desired.  He simply would tell her that he was doing it for her to show his love and that it was all for her. She was deeply hurt and at times very offended. She grew to doubt whether he loved her at all or rather she was just a replacement because the one he still loved was no longer there.

How obvious it must seem to all of us that the man is making a big mistake and certainly not showing love by insisting he do things his way or the way of his first wife. How is the parable going to end? If it is to end well, the man must admit he was wrong and decide to visibly repent of, or turn away from, his ways and learn the ways of the one he wishes to love and honor.

In a way you get to finish the story… you see many of us treat God the same way as the man in the parable treats his second wife. We have learned and accepted certain ways of doing things. In some cases they are now traditions with happy memories that have been accepted for hundreds or thousands of years. We are strongly influenced by our family and cultural traditions and are emotionally connected to doing something a certain way. However, as we come to know the LORD and increase in our relationship with Him, are we willing to turn from our way of doing things and seek out and follow His ways? God has clearly communicated what He likes and does not like… what is good and bad in the holy scriptures. Often times we are not willing to lay down what is important to us to pick up what His word really says is important to Him.  Do not rely on what your church does, or what your parents did, or your friends do. Rely on what the scriptures say God wants.

Just as in the case with the widower who remarried, not being aware that we are doing what is bad makes it no less offensive. Why do we not take time to learn what God values…what He wants from us?

Claiming we can take something that is bad in God’s eyes and make it into something that is good is like saying we can give someone a weed, but call it a rose and everything will be great. It is like giving someone a daisy when their favorite flower is a rose… but we tell them it is a rose.

We must each decide if we are to cling to our traditions of man, like the Pharisees and Sadducees who came against Jesus, or if we are to stand up and do things God’s way as Jesus and His disciples did, even if we are mocked for it.

Would it surprise you to know that Christmas trees, evergreen wreaths, mistletoe, gift exchange, even celebrating on Dec 25 are all  based on pagan worship practices which the church originally banned but later accepted because people would not stop doing them? Of course much of Easter celebration also has origins in pagan worship as well. The church decided if we can’t get people to stop their detestable pagan worship, then we will join them but make up a new story to explain the items previously used in pagan worship. They took a weed and called it a rose.

If you truly love God, and submit your life to God… take the time to learn more about what He wants and not just stick to traditions of men that are offensive to Him. You can easily study online even using Christian encyclopedia’s like Zondervan or other encyclopedias. The origins are not secret, only that it has been accepted to celebrate God in ways that were developed by pagans for their gods. 119Ministries.com has put together an effective documentary in video form you can watch (The Christmas Question). They have previous teachings available for free you may consider as well (Sunburned – Part 1 and Sunburned – Part 2).

The LORD has also given us instructions on what holy days to celebrate to point to Him and our relationship with Him. They are called the Moedim and are outlined in Leviticus 23 and other places throughout the Bible. You can find scripture where Jesus participated in the Moedim. You will never find record of Jesus celebrating Christmas and Easter (or almost anything we celebrate commonly today) in the Biblical record. Passover and Easter are very different. See what they focus on. With God’s celebrations, the focus is always on Him and not gifts or food or simply ourselves. To learn more, scroll through and read from our Traditions/ Holidays category of teachings.

I recognize that this is an emotional subject for many and admitting that we should change is very hard. Even if we accept it and change our behavior, there will be much difficulty among family. This is to be expected when we stand for Christ above all others. Jesus said so himself in Matthew 10:23-39.

³² “Everyone who acknowledges me publicly here on earth, I will also acknowledge before my Father in heaven. ³³ But everyone who denies me here on earth, I will also deny before my Father in heaven.

³⁴ “Don’t imagine that I came to bring peace to the earth! I came not to bring peace, but a sword.

³⁷ “If you love your father or mother more than you love me, you are not worthy of being mine; or if you love your son or daughter more than me, you are not worthy of being mine. ³⁸ If you refuse to take up your cross and follow me, you are not worthy of being mine. ³⁹ If you cling to your life, you will lose it; but if you give up your life for me, you will find it.

We each must decide whether or not we submit to God fully or hold tightly to the traditions of man. By the way… study of the new testament clearly shows that clutching to the traditions of man was the way of the Pharisees and Sadducees, not the way of Jesus.

God wants his people to be holy (set apart for God’s use) and righteous (living according to God’s commands rather than the world’s). He wants us to put Him first, above everything else.

Challenge yourself to objectively evaluate your traditions and seek first the kingdom of God. Do not dismiss this quickly but rather prayerfully seek God to show you the truth of His word and how to apply it in your life. Ask yourself about any tradition you claim to observe to honor God, if you were not influenced by family or cultural traditions would you naturally come up with this tradition by studying the Bible? If not, that can be a good indicator.

Pray that God would give you courage and boldness to pursue him with how you live. My family and I have been on this journey, we remain on this journey still today. It is difficult at times, but well worth pursuing to grow closer to Him and be more pleasing to Him. Trust in His ways over those of men.

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Have you submitted your life to Jesus Christ? Are you living today filled with the peace and joy of truly knowing and following Jesus Christ? Learn more about salvation through The Message of the Cross.