Category Archives: Marriage

Compassion, Diligent / Hard Worker, Faith / Trusting God, Fear / Reverence for God, Kindness / Gentleness, Marriage, Proverbs (Wisdom & Folly), Wise

The Beauty of Noble Character: A Life of Wisdom and Service (Proverbs 31)

What does it mean to live a life of noble character?

Proverbs 31 gives us a portrait of a person who embodies wisdom, strength, and service—a model for all of us as we seek to honor God in our daily lives.

Key Verse: “Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.” – Proverbs 31:30 (NIV)

Background Context: Proverbs 31 is well-known for its description of the “virtuous woman” or “woman of noble character,” but its wisdom applies to both men and women who seek to live lives that reflect God’s wisdom and character. This final chapter of Proverbs serves as a culmination of the themes throughout the book—calling us to embrace wisdom, live with integrity, and seek God in all that we do. It begins with advice from King Lemuel’s mother about the qualities of a righteous leader and then shifts to the portrayal of the woman of noble character, who is industrious, wise, compassionate, and deeply rooted in the fear of the Lord.

(Summarized and continued after scripture)

Proverbs 31

The Words of Lemuel

1The words of King Lemuel, the oracle which his mother taught him:

2What, O my son?
And what, O son of my womb?
And what, O son of my vows?

3Do not give your strength to women,
Or your ways to that which destroys kings.

4It is not for kings, O Lemuel,
It is not for kings to drink wine,
Or for rulers to desire strong drink,

5For they will drink and forget what is decreed,
And pervert the rights of all the afflicted.

6Give strong drink to him who is perishing,
And wine to him whose life is bitter.

7Let him drink and forget his poverty
And remember his trouble no more.

8Open your mouth for the mute,
For the rights of all the unfortunate.

9Open your mouth, judge righteously,
And defend the rights of the afflicted and needy.

Description of a Worthy Woman

10An excellent wife, who can find?
For her worth is far above jewels.

11The heart of her husband trusts in her,
And he will have no lack of gain.

12She does him good and not evil
All the days of her life.

13She looks for wool and flax
And works with her hands in delight.

14She is like merchant ships;
She brings her food from afar.

15She rises also while it is still night
And gives food to her household
And portions to her maidens.

16She considers a field and buys it;
From her earnings she plants a vineyard.

17She girds herself with strength
And makes her arms strong.

18She senses that her gain is good;
Her lamp does not go out at night.

19She stretches out her hands to the distaff,
And her hands grasp the spindle.

20She extends her hand to the poor,
And she stretches out her hands to the needy.

21She is not afraid of the snow for her household,
For all her household are clothed with scarlet.

22She makes coverings for herself;
Her clothing is fine linen and purple.

23Her husband is known in the gates,
When he sits among the elders of the land.

24She makes linen garments and sells them,
And supplies belts to the tradesmen.

25Strength and dignity are her clothing,
And she smiles at the future.

26She opens her mouth in wisdom,
And the teaching of kindness is on her tongue.

27She looks well to the ways of her household,
And does not eat the bread of idleness.

28Her children rise up and bless her;
Her husband also, and he praises her, saying:

29“Many daughters have done nobly,
But you excel them all.”

30Charm is deceitful and beauty is vain,
But a woman who fears the LORD, she shall be praised.

31Give her the product of her hands,
And let her works praise her in the gates.

Reflection on Proverbs 31:

  • A Life of Noble Character: The woman described in Proverbs 31 is praised for her noble character, which is demonstrated through her actions, integrity, and wisdom (Proverbs 31:10). The idea of “noble character” encompasses not just moral uprightness but also diligence, kindness, and strength. It reminds us that true worth is not found in external achievements or appearances but in living a life that reflects God’s values. For men and women alike, noble character means embodying the qualities of wisdom, integrity, and service to others.
  • Diligence and Hard Work: The woman in Proverbs 31 is described as diligent in all she does, whether managing her household, providing for her family, or engaging in business (Proverbs 31:13-19). She rises early, works with her hands, and ensures that her family and household are well cared for. This teaches us the value of hard work and dedication in our everyday tasks. Whether in our homes, workplaces, or communities, we are called to work faithfully and responsibly, knowing that our efforts honor God.
  • Compassion and Generosity: In addition to her industriousness, the woman of noble character is also compassionate and generous. She opens her arms to the poor and extends her hands to the needy (Proverbs 31:20). This reflects the heart of God, who cares for the vulnerable and calls us to do the same. True wisdom is not just about personal success; it’s about using what we have to bless others and meet the needs of those around us.
  • Strength and Dignity: Proverbs 31:25 says, “She is clothed with strength and dignity; she can laugh at the days to come.” This strength is not just physical but spiritual and emotional. It comes from trusting in God and knowing that He is in control. The ability to “laugh at the days to come” shows a confidence in God’s provision and protection. For us, this means cultivating an inner strength that comes from faith, allowing us to face the future without fear or anxiety.
  • Wisdom and Kindness: The woman in Proverbs 31 speaks with wisdom, and faithful instruction is on her tongue (Proverbs 31:26). Her words are marked by kindness, showing that true wisdom is not harsh or judgmental but compassionate and thoughtful. This challenges us to consider how we speak and interact with others. Are our words filled with wisdom and kindness, or do they tear others down?
  • The Fear of the Lord: The most important quality of the woman described in Proverbs 31 is her fear of the Lord (Proverbs 31:30). This reverence for God is the foundation of her character and the source of her wisdom. Charm and beauty may fade, but a life rooted in the fear of the Lord endures. For all of us, the fear of the Lord—respect, awe, and obedience to God—is the key to living a life that honors Him and blesses others.

Summary Key Points:

  • Noble Character: True worth and beauty come from living a life of integrity, wisdom, and service to others. Noble character reflects God’s heart and values.
  • Diligence and Hard Work: Like the woman in Proverbs 31, we are called to work diligently in whatever tasks God has placed before us, doing everything for His glory.
  • Compassion and Generosity: True wisdom is not selfish but extends compassion and generosity to those in need. We honor God by caring for the vulnerable.
  • Strength and Confidence in God: We can face the future with strength and dignity, trusting in God’s provision and protection, allowing us to live without fear.
  • Wisdom and Kindness in Speech: Our words should reflect the wisdom and kindness of God, building others up and offering faithful instruction.
  • The Fear of the Lord: A life that honors God is rooted in the fear of the Lord. This reverence for God is the foundation of true wisdom and noble character.

Application: Consider how you can cultivate noble character in your own life. Are you approaching your work, your relationships, and your daily responsibilities with diligence and integrity? Reflect on how you can show compassion and generosity to those in need around you. Think about the words you speak—are they filled with wisdom and kindness? Finally, ask yourself if your life is rooted in the fear of the Lord. Are you living with a reverence for God that shapes your actions, decisions, and relationships? Take time to pray and ask God to strengthen your character so that it reflects His heart.

Closing Prayer: Heavenly Father, we thank You for the example of noble character in Proverbs 31. Help us to live with integrity, wisdom, and compassion, serving others faithfully and trusting in Your provision. Teach us to work diligently in all we do and to extend generosity to those in need. Fill our hearts with reverence for You, and may our words be marked by wisdom and kindness. We seek to honor You in every area of our lives, knowing that true beauty and worth come from living in obedience to You. In Jesus’ name, Amen.

May the grace and peace of our Lord, Yeshua, be with you.

John Golda

Do you know for sure if you will go to heaven or hell when you die? Are you experiencing in your life the peace and joy of a personal relationship with our Creator and Father? Learn more about salvation through The Message of the Cross.

Divorce, Marriage, Purposeful / Intentional, Rebuke Wrong Behavior, Repenting from Sin

Upholding God’s Standards: Marriage, Divorce, and the Call to Live Righteously

In a world that increasingly normalizes behaviors contrary to God’s Word, how are we as believers to respond?

Luke 16:18 provides a direct and challenging teaching on marriage and divorce, reminding us of the seriousness with which God views these sacred bonds, and calling us to uphold His standards in our lives.

Key Verse: “Everyone who divorces his wife and marries another commits adultery, and he who marries a woman divorced from her husband commits adultery.” – Luke 16:18 (ESV)

Background Context: In Luke 16, Jesus teaches about stewardship, righteousness, and faithfulness to God’s commandments. Tucked within these teachings is a seemingly unrelated verse on divorce and remarriage (Luke 16:18). At first glance, it may appear out of place, but it carries a powerful message that connects with the broader theme of faithfulness and the importance of upholding God’s standards in all areas of life, particularly in marriage.

Luke 16:18

      18“Everyone who divorces his wife and marries another commits adultery, and he who marries one who is divorced from a husband commits adultery.

Reflection on Luke 16:18:

  • The Sanctity of Marriage: Jesus’ statement in Luke 16:18 is clear and direct: divorce and remarriage, outside of God’s intended design, is equated with adultery. This echoes Jesus’ teachings elsewhere in the Gospels, where He affirms that God’s intention for marriage is “until death do us part” (Matthew 19:3-9). Divorce was permitted by the law because of the hardness of human hearts, but it was never God’s ideal. His design for marriage is a lifelong covenant of faithfulness between one man and one woman.
  • Cultural and Moral Decay: In the context of Luke 16, this verse serves as a critique of the Pharisees, who often lowered God’s standards to accommodate cultural norms and human weaknesses. Ellicott’s Commentary points out that the Pharisees’ lax attitude toward divorce was akin to the unjust steward’s act of reducing debts. It reflects a pattern of lowering the standards of God’s commandments to suit personal or societal preferences. Unfortunately, this same trend persists in our modern culture, where behaviors like divorce, abortion, homosexuality, adultery, and fornication are often normalized or excused—even among those who claim to follow Christ.
  • The Call to Uphold God’s Standards: As believers, we are called to uphold God’s standards in a culture that increasingly seeks to lower them. Marriage is just one example where God’s command is clear, yet the world pushes back with its own ideas of convenience, self-gratification, and autonomy. We are reminded that God’s ways are higher than our ways (Isaiah 55:8-9), and we must stand firm in living according to His truth, even when it’s countercultural.
  • Repentance and Restoration: For those who have gone through divorce, this teaching may be difficult to hear. It’s important to remember that God is a God of grace, mercy, and forgiveness. If you have divorced or remarried outside of God’s design, seek His forgiveness with a repentant heart, knowing that He is faithful to forgive (1 John 1:9). But let us not make light of divorce or sin in general. Divorce is a painful and destructive act that often leaves lasting scars on families and individuals. We are called to take marriage seriously, to honor the covenant we make, and to seek God’s guidance in every step of our relationships.
  • Engaging in the Cultural Battle: Beyond our personal lives, we are called to engage in the cultural battle against the normalization of sin. This means speaking out against the lowering of God’s standards in our communities, churches, and governments. It is not enough to say, “It’s not right for me, but let others live how they choose.” We must lovingly yet boldly uphold the truth of God’s Word and seek to bring His light into the darkness. As followers of Christ, we must actively work to promote His values, both in prayer and in action.

Summary Key Points:

  • God’s Design for Marriage: Marriage is a lifelong covenant, and divorce is not part of God’s plan for His people. We are called to uphold the sanctity of marriage and take it seriously.
  • Cultural Pressure to Lower Standards: Just as the Pharisees lowered God’s standards for marriage, our culture often normalizes behaviors that go against God’s Word. We are called to stand firm in the truth.
  • Repentance and Grace: For those who have experienced divorce, there is forgiveness and grace. Seek God’s restoration, but also recognize the gravity of sin and the importance of honoring God’s standards moving forward.
  • Active Engagement in the Battle for Righteousness: As believers, we are called not to be passive but to actively engage in promoting God’s values in our communities and the world, starting with prayer and continuing with action.

Application: Take time today to reflect on your view of marriage, relationships, and God’s standards in your life. Are there areas where you have allowed cultural norms to influence your thinking more than God’s Word? If you have experienced divorce, seek God’s forgiveness and healing, and commit to honoring Him in your current relationships. Pray for strength to stand firm in the truth, even when it’s difficult, and ask God to guide you in how you can actively engage in upholding His standards in your community and beyond.

Closing Prayer: Heavenly Father, we come before You recognizing the sacredness of marriage and the importance of upholding Your standards in a world that seeks to lower them. Help us to honor You in our relationships, standing firm in the truth of Your Word. We ask for Your forgiveness where we have fallen short and for Your strength to live faithfully according to Your commands. Guide us as we engage in the battle for righteousness, and may we be lights in a dark world, bringing Your truth to those around us. In Jesus’ name, Amen.

May the grace and peace of our Lord, Yeshua, be with you.

John Golda

Do you know for sure if you will go to heaven or hell when you die? Are you experiencing in your life the peace and joy of a personal relationship with our Creator and Father? Learn more about salvation through The Message of the Cross.

Adultery / Sex Outside Marriage, Diligent / Hard Worker, Marriage, Money / Finances / Wealth

Wisdom’s Warning: Stewardship, Diligence, and a Guarded Heart (Proverbs 6)

Have you ever felt the weight of regret after making a hasty decision, wishing you had paused to consider the consequences beforehand?

In Proverbs 6, we encounter a series of admonitions that serve as a stern reminder of the perils of folly and the importance of heeding wisdom’s counsel.

Reconnect: As we delve into Proverbs 6, we’re confronted with the sobering realities of life’s choices and their far-reaching implications. The sage wisdom offered in this chapter serves as a guiding light, illuminating the path of righteousness and warning against the pitfalls of ignorance and folly.

(Summarized and continued after the scripture)

Proverbs 6

     Parental Counsel

     1My son, if you have become surety for your neighbor,
Have given a pledge for a stranger,

2If you have been snared with the words of your mouth,
Have been caught with the words of your mouth,

3Do this then, my son, and deliver yourself;
Since you have come into the hand of your neighbor,
Go, humble yourself, and importune your neighbor.

4Give no sleep to your eyes,
Nor slumber to your eyelids;

5Deliver yourself like a gazelle from the hunter’s hand
And like a bird from the hand of the fowler.

6Go to the ant, O sluggard,
Observe her ways and be wise,

7Which, having no chief,
Officer or ruler,

8Prepares her food in the summer
And gathers her provision in the harvest.

9How long will you lie down, O sluggard?
When will you arise from your sleep?

10“A little sleep, a little slumber,
A little folding of the hands to rest”—

11Your poverty will come in like a vagabond
And your need like an armed man.

12A worthless person, a wicked man,
Is the one who walks with a perverse mouth,

13Who winks with his eyes, who signals with his feet,
Who points with his fingers;

14Who with perversity in his heart continually devises evil,
Who spreads strife.

15Therefore his calamity will come suddenly;
Instantly he will be broken and there will be no healing.

16There are six things which the LORD hates,
Yes, seven which are an abomination to Him:

17Haughty eyes, a lying tongue,
And hands that shed innocent blood,

18A heart that devises wicked plans,
Feet that run rapidly to evil,

19A false witness who utters lies,
And one who spreads strife among brothers.

20My son, observe the commandment of your father
And do not forsake the teaching of your mother;

21Bind them continually on your heart;
Tie them around your neck.

22When you walk about, they will guide you;
When you sleep, they will watch over you;
And when you awake, they will talk to you.

23For the commandment is a lamp and the teaching is light;
And reproofs for discipline are the way of life

24To keep you from the evil woman,
From the smooth tongue of the adulteress.

25Do not desire her beauty in your heart,
Nor let her capture you with her eyelids.

26For on account of a harlot one is reduced to a loaf of bread,
And an adulteress hunts for the precious life.

27Can a man take fire in his bosom
And his clothes not be burned?

28Or can a man walk on hot coals
And his feet not be scorched?

29So is the one who goes in to his neighbor’s wife;
Whoever touches her will not go unpunished.

30Men do not despise a thief if he steals
To satisfy himself when he is hungry;

31But when he is found, he must repay sevenfold;
He must give all the substance of his house.

32The one who commits adultery with a woman is lacking sense;
He who would destroy himself does it.

33Wounds and disgrace he will find,
And his reproach will not be blotted out.

34For jealousy enrages a man,
And he will not spare in the day of vengeance.

35He will not accept any ransom,
Nor will he be satisfied though you give many gifts.

Summary Key Points:

  • The Danger of Surety for Others: The chapter begins with a caution against becoming ensnared by the debts of others, urging vigilance and discernment in financial matters. It emphasizes the importance of prudence and restraint, lest one find themselves bound by obligations beyond their means.
  • The Warning Against Laziness: The sage admonishes against the allure of idleness and slothfulness, highlighting the destructive consequences of neglecting one’s responsibilities. Laziness is likened to a relentless predator, prowling in search of prey and leading to poverty and ruin.
  • The Consequences of Adultery: The chapter issues a stern warning against the temptation of adultery, portraying it as a path of destruction that leads to grave consequences. The imagery used vividly illustrates the devastation wrought by infidelity, urging readers to guard their hearts and honor their commitments.

Call to Action:

As we reflect on the wisdom found in Proverbs 6, let us respond with:

  • Prudent Stewardship: Let us exercise wisdom and discernment in our financial dealings, avoiding the snare of surety and practicing prudence in our commitments.
  • Diligent Work Ethic: May we embrace a spirit of diligence and industry, recognizing the value of hard work and the perils of slothfulness. Let us fulfill our responsibilities with excellence, knowing that diligence leads to prosperity.
  • Guarded Hearts: In matters of relationships and fidelity, let us remain vigilant and guard our hearts against the temptations of adultery. May we cherish and honor our commitments, fostering trust and fidelity in our relationships.

Closing Prayer:

Heavenly Father, grant us the wisdom to navigate life’s choices with prudence and discernment. Help us to heed the warnings of folly and to embrace the path of righteousness laid out before us. Strengthen us to resist temptation and to walk in integrity, honoring You in all that we do. Amen.

May the grace and peace of our Lord, Yeshua, be with you.

John Golda

Do you know for sure if you will go to heaven or hell when you die? Are you experiencing in your life the peace and joy of a personal relationship with our Creator and Father? Learn more about salvation through The Message of the Cross.

Children, Church / Body of Christ, Leadership, Marriage, Submitted / Servant

Qualities of Servant-Leaders: A Closer Look at 1 Timothy 3

Have you ever wondered what it takes to be a servant-leader in the community of faith?

In the Apostle Paul’s first letter to Timothy, we discover a valuable guide that outlines the qualities and characteristics of those who aspire to serve as overseers and deacons in the early Christian church. This guidance, found in 1 Timothy 3, offers timeless wisdom for all who seek to lead and serve within the body of believers.

Reconnect: Before we delve into 1 Timothy 3, let’s remember the context. Paul wrote this letter to Timothy, a young leader in the early Christian community, to provide guidance on various matters within the church. In this chapter, Paul focuses on the qualifications and expectations for overseers and deacons.

(Summarized and continued after the scripture)

1 Timothy 3

Overseers and Deacons

     1It is a trustworthy statement: if any man aspires to the office of overseer, it is a fine work he desires to do. 2An overseer, then, must be above reproach, the husband of one wife, temperate, prudent, respectable, hospitable, able to teach, 3not addicted to wine or pugnacious, but gentle, peaceable, free from the love of money. 4He must be one who manages his own household well, keeping his children under control with all dignity 5(but if a man does not know how to manage his own household, how will he take care of the church of God?), 6and not a new convert, so that he will not become conceited and fall into the condemnation incurred by the devil. 7And he must have a good reputation with those outside the church, so that he will not fall into reproach and the snare of the devil.

      8Deacons likewise must be men of dignity, not double-tongued, or addicted to much wine or fond of sordid gain, 9but holding to the mystery of the faith with a clear conscience. 10These men must also first be tested; then let them serve as deacons if they are beyond reproach. 11Women must likewise be dignified, not malicious gossips, but temperate, faithful in all things. 12Deacons must be husbands of only one wife, and good managers of their children and their own households. 13For those who have served well as deacons obtain for themselves a high standing and great confidence in the faith that is in Christ Jesus.

      14I am writing these things to you, hoping to come to you before long; 15but in case I am delayed, I write so that you will know how one ought to conduct himself in the household of God, which is the church of the living God, the pillar and support of the truth.

16By common confession, great is the mystery of godliness:
He who was revealed in the flesh,
Was vindicated in the Spirit,
Seen by angels,
Proclaimed among the nations,
Believed on in the world,
Taken up in glory.

Summary Key Points:

  1. The Role of Overseers: Paul begins by addressing the qualifications for overseers, also known as bishops or pastors. These individuals are called to provide spiritual leadership, guidance, and oversight to the congregation. The qualities Paul highlights include being above reproach, faithful in marriage, temperate, self-controlled, hospitable, and able to teach.
  2. The Role of Deacons: Paul also outlines the qualifications for deacons, who serve alongside overseers in various practical and administrative roles within the church. Deacons are to be dignified, sincere, not given to excessive drinking, and committed to holding the mystery of the faith with a clear conscience.
  3. Family Life: In addition to personal character, Paul emphasizes the importance of family life in evaluating potential overseers and deacons. He discusses the qualities of being a good husband and father, highlighting that one’s management of their own household is a reflection of their ability to serve in the household of God.
  4. The Church as God’s Household: Throughout this passage, Paul underscores the significance of the church as God’s household. He reminds Timothy that these guidelines are meant to ensure the church functions with integrity, honor, and orderliness.

As we reflect on the qualities of servant-leaders outlined in 1 Timothy 3, we are called to examine our own lives and leadership roles within the community of faith.

Whether we aspire to formal leadership positions or simply seek to be faithful servants, let us strive to embody the qualities of character, integrity, and humility that Paul highlights.

May we continually seek to grow in our walk with Christ, knowing that our leadership, in whatever capacity, is an opportunity to serve and honor God.

Let us pray:

Heavenly Father, we come before you with hearts filled with gratitude for the guidance you provide through your Word. We thank you for the wisdom found in 1 Timothy 3, which sets a standard for servant-leaders in your church.

Lord, help us to cultivate the qualities of character and integrity outlined in this passage. Grant us the humility to serve others with love and selflessness. As we seek to lead by example, may your Spirit empower us to live out these qualities in our daily lives.

We also pray for our church leaders, both present and future. May they be equipped with the qualities that honor you and serve your people effectively.

In Jesus’ name, we pray. Amen.

Discussion and Comment:

What aspects of the qualities outlined in 1 Timothy 3 resonate with you as important for servant-leaders?

How can these qualities be applied in various roles within the church and in daily life? Share your thoughts, engage in a discussion with friends or family, and feel free to leave your comments below.

May the grace and peace of our Lord, Yeshua, be with you.

John Golda

Do you know for sure if you will go to heaven or hell when you die? Are you experiencing in your life the peace and joy of a personal relationship with our Creator and Father? Learn more about salvation through The Message of the Cross.

Guide, Jesus (hearing from God), Marriage

What God Has Joined, Let No Man Separate (Marriage)

Jesus has a way of speaking clearly, but sometimes if we don’t like His instruction, we try to find ways to change it, rather than obey it. Divorce is never God’s intent. Because of the hardness of our hearts, He permits it, but that does not make it good.

Mark 10:1-12

Jesus’ Teaching about Divorce

      1Getting up, He went from there to the region of Judea and beyond the Jordan; crowds gathered around Him again, and, according to His custom, He once more began to teach them.

      2Some Pharisees came up to Jesus, testing Him, and began to question Him whether it was lawful for a man to divorce a wife. 3And He answered and said to them, “What did Moses command you?” 4They said, “Moses permitted a man TO WRITE A CERTIFICATE OF DIVORCE AND SEND her AWAY.” 5But Jesus said to them, “Because of your hardness of heart he wrote you this commandment. 6“But from the beginning of creation, God MADE THEM MALE AND FEMALE. 7“FOR THIS REASON A MAN SHALL LEAVE HIS FATHER AND MOTHER, 8AND THE TWO SHALL BECOME ONE FLESH; so they are no longer two, but one flesh. 9“What therefore God has joined together, let no man separate.”

      10In the house the disciples began questioning Him about this again. 11And He said to them, “Whoever divorces his wife and marries another woman commits adultery against her; 12and if she herself divorces her husband and marries another man, she is committing adultery.”

Divorce is painful and destructive process… like planting two small plants next to one another in a small plot of ground. After they grow together, the roots intertwine and if you try to separate them you will damage or destroy one or both of the plants in the process.

We should use wisdom and godly council and prayer before selecting a spouse. Avoid choosing based on “warm fuzzy feelings”, as that does not last. After being married, continue investing in your spouse… in knowing, loving, serving them. Each of you seek God together and individually. You will grow closer and closer to each other as you do so. Model your behavior and attitudes toward one another off of Biblical teaching. “Sacrifice” comes before “self” in a successful marriage. Follow the example of how Jesus sacrificed and suffered for the church, symbolically His bride, and how the church is called to follow after His example and instruction… His leadership.

Those who have been through divorce already can be forgiven through the death and resurrection of Christ. He paid the price for our sin. Seek to learn from whatever the situation was and not repeat it.

Read more and find resources to support healthy marriage on our website Marriage page.

I invite you to pray with me:

Father, please bless Your people in marriage. Lead and guide them to make wise choices that are pleasing to You. For those facing difficulty in marriage, please help guide them. Help them to be selfless and sacrificing, putting their spouse ahead of themselves. Help them to seek to draw near to You, and in so doing, grow nearer to each other. For those in situations for which their lives are in danger, please protect and guide them as they face such a harsh situation and seek to make the right decision to find safety. For those who have already been involved in divorce, please forgive them and help them to heal and deal graciously with the resulting complexity of relationships that often comes from divorce, especially if children are involved. Help Your people to stand out from the culture around them in regards to marriage, rather than blend in, so that You would receive glory. Amen.

Shalom

Devotion by John in service to Christ

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Do you know for sure if you will go to heaven or hell when you die? Are you experiencing in your life the peace and joy of a personal relationship with our Creator and Father? Learn more about salvation through The Message of the Cross.

Love, Marriage, Seeking God, Song of Solomon

Long for Your Spouse and for God

I find Song of Solomon 8 a bit hard to fully digest and understand at first. I believe it is at once showing us a passionate and virtuous love between bride and groom and also an allegory for our love for Christ as the true body of Christ.

It begins with an innocence that seems to wish that her love had not the trappings of being king, so that she could love him more privately and without anyone despising her.

It includes some additional allegories, one in verse 8 about the younger daughter who may soon be of courting age.  The story highlights that should the girl be virtuous and avoid men’s advances, she will be honored. Should she be weak and susceptible to temptation, then they will try to protect her. This can also apply to us in a spiritual sense in our relationship with Yeshua. Let us not commit spiritual sin by participating with other false beliefs or false gods. Let us be pure and set aside for our Lord.

Another allegory begins later in verse 11 concerning vineyards. It would appear a reference perhaps to our being good stewards to all our Lord provides to us to manage in this life. All that we have belongs to Him. Let us use it well and consistently with His desires and instructions. Let us not be greedy and driven only by our own desires.

At the close, we see again how she can hardly wait for her love to come. Oh that we should be so anxious for our Lord to come and be with us… that we should put that focus in our prayer, Bible study, and worship time as priority above other daily activities.

Song of Solomon 8

The Lovers Speak

    1“Oh that you were like a brother to me
Who nursed at my mother’s breasts.
If I found you outdoors, I would kiss you;
No one would despise me, either.

      2“I would lead you and bring you
Into the house of my mother, who used to instruct me;
I would give you spiced wine to drink from the juice of my pomegranates.

      3“Let his left hand be under my head
And his right hand embrace me.”

      4“I want you to swear, O daughters of Jerusalem,
Do not arouse or awaken my love
Until she pleases.”

      5“Who is this coming up from the wilderness
Leaning on her beloved?”

“Beneath the apple tree I awakened you;
There your mother was in labor with you,
There she was in labor and gave you birth.

      6“Put me like a seal over your heart,
Like a seal on your arm.
For love is as strong as death,
Jealousy is as severe as Sheol;
Its flashes are flashes of fire,
The very flame of the LORD.

      7“Many waters cannot quench love,
Nor will rivers overflow it;
If a man were to give all the riches of his house for love,
It would be utterly despised.”

      8“We have a little sister,
And she has no breasts;
What shall we do for our sister
On the day when she is spoken for?

      9“If she is a wall,
We will build on her a battlement of silver;
But if she is a door,
We will barricade her with planks of cedar.”

      10“I was a wall, and my breasts were like towers;
Then I became in his eyes as one who finds peace.

      11“Solomon had a vineyard at Baal-hamon;
He entrusted the vineyard to caretakers.
Each one was to bring a thousand shekels of silver for its fruit.

      12“My very own vineyard is at my disposal;
The thousand shekels are for you, Solomon,
And two hundred are for those who take care of its fruit.”

      13“O you who sit in the gardens,
My companions are listening for your voice—
Let me hear it!”

      14“Hurry, my beloved,
And be like a gazelle or a young stag
On the mountains of spices.”

Ask the Lord to help you want more of Him… more worship, more prayer time, more Bible study. Ask Him to make it a desire of your heart and not just another task to be done each day. Let it be exciting to us as if waiting on the one we love to come to see us.

At the same time, for those of us who are married, let us also ask Him to help us continue to long for our spouse in this way that we should cherish our time together and not take it for granted. It is also important that we lead our hearts in how we think about and long for our spouse! Focus on what is good and what is exciting about them.

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Do you know for sure if you will go to heaven or hell when you die? Are you experiencing in your life the peace and joy of a personal relationship with our Creator and Father? Learn more about salvation through The Message of the Cross.

Marriage

Stay Passionate About One Another in Marriage

Song of Solomon demonstrates a very clear passionate form of love to be shared between a husband and wife. They appreciate physical beauty and this is good. Many today try to downplay the value of physical beauty, but we should take care neither to overplay or ignore its importance. Try to see past the specific metaphors. They may not make sense to us in our culture and time today, but you can clearly tell that the couple is passionate about one another.  If there is one lesson to take in this regard, perhaps it is a powerful reminder that the Bible was written for us, but not to us. It was written to a Jewish culture of several thousand years ago. To fully understand as YHWH intended, we must seek to understand not just the translated words, but also the cultural significance to the audience at the time it was written.

Song of Solomon 7

Admiration by the Bridegroom

     1“How beautiful are your feet in sandals,
O prince’s daughter!
The curves of your hips are like jewels,
The work of the hands of an artist.

      2“Your navel is like a round goblet
Which never lacks mixed wine;
Your belly is like a heap of wheat
Fenced about with lilies.

      3“Your two breasts are like two fawns,
Twins of a gazelle.

      4“Your neck is like a tower of ivory,
Your eyes like the pools in Heshbon
By the gate of Bath-rabbim;
Your nose is like the tower of Lebanon,
Which faces toward Damascus.

      5“Your head crowns you like Carmel,
And the flowing locks of your head are like purple threads;
The king is captivated by your tresses.

      6“How beautiful and how delightful you are,
My love, with all your charms!

      7“Your stature is like a palm tree,
And your breasts are like its clusters.

      8“I said, ‘I will climb the palm tree,
I will take hold of its fruit stalks.’
Oh, may your breasts be like clusters of the vine,
And the fragrance of your breath like apples,

      9And your mouth like the best wine!”

“It goes down smoothly for my beloved,
Flowing gently through the lips of those who fall asleep.

The Union of Love

     10“I am my beloved’s,
And his desire is for me.

      11“Come, my beloved, let us go out into the country,
Let us spend the night in the villages.

      12“Let us rise early and go to the vineyards;
Let us see whether the vine has budded
And its blossoms have opened,
And whether the pomegranates have bloomed.
There I will give you my love.

      13“The mandrakes have given forth fragrance;
And over our doors are all choice fruits,
Both new and old,
Which I have saved up for you, my beloved.

A husband and wife should embrace being passionate about one another. Strive not to drift to being just friendly roommates. Continue to seek to know, love, and serve one another with passion. This is God’s intention for us in marriage.

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Do you know for sure if you will go to heaven or hell when you die? Are you experiencing in your life the peace and joy of a personal relationship with our Creator and Father? Learn more about salvation through The Message of the Cross.

Marriage

Mutual Delight In Each Other

Sometimes our culture chooses to portray sex and sexual attraction outside of marriage as “exciting” and sex inside marriage as nonexistent or boring. Some in the church even get misled into thinking somehow they are not supposed to be excited about it. God created sex as a gift in our relationship between husband and wife. We are to enjoy it and through it, we are to strengthen our bond of intimacy. We are supposed to find delight in each other in this way.

Song of Solomon 6

Mutual Delight in Each Other

1“Where has your beloved gone,
O most beautiful among women?
Where has your beloved turned,
That we may seek him with you?”

      2“My beloved has gone down to his garden,
To the beds of balsam,
To pasture his flock in the gardens
And gather lilies.

      3“I am my beloved’s and my beloved is mine,
He who pastures his flock among the lilies.”

      4“You are as beautiful as Tirzah, my darling,
As lovely as Jerusalem,
As awesome as an army with banners.

      5“Turn your eyes away from me,
For they have confused me;
Your hair is like a flock of goats
That have descended from Gilead.

      6“Your teeth are like a flock of ewes
Which have come up from their washing,
All of which bear twins,
And not one among them has lost her young.

      7“Your temples are like a slice of a pomegranate
Behind your veil.

      8“There are sixty queens and eighty concubines,
And maidens without number;

      9But my dove, my perfect one, is unique:
She is her mother’s only daughter;
She is the pure child of the one who bore her.
The maidens saw her and called her blessed,
The queens and the concubines also, and they praised her, saying,

      10‘Who is this that grows like the dawn,
As beautiful as the full moon,
As pure as the sun,
As awesome as an army with banners?’

      11“I went down to the orchard of nut trees
To see the blossoms of the valley,
To see whether the vine had budded
Or the pomegranates had bloomed.

      12“Before I was aware, my soul set me
Over the chariots of my noble people.”

      13“Come back, come back, O Shulammite;
Come back, come back, that we may gaze at you!”

“Why should you gaze at the Shulammite,
As at the dance of the two companies?

In fact, sex in marriage is so important that we are told not to withhold it from one another. It is to be given and enjoyed freely, not withheld for power or to force someone to agree to something else. The Biblical view is really anchored in the concept that the two have become one. They are no longer separate individuals.

1 Corinthians 7:3-5

3The husband must fulfill his duty to his wife, and likewise also the wife to her husband. 4The wife does not have authority over her own body, but the husband does; and likewise also the husband does not have authority over his own body, but the wife does. 5Stop depriving one another, except by agreement for a time, so that you may devote yourselves to prayer, and come together again so that Satan will not tempt you because of your lack of self-control.

Do not deprive one another such that Satan can utilize that opportunity to tempt you into sin. Do not use sex or withholding of sex as a negotiating tactic. Enjoy sex together as husband and wife and let it strengthen your intimacy.

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Do you know for sure if you will go to heaven or hell when you die? Are you experiencing in your life the peace and joy of a personal relationship with our Creator and Father? Learn more about salvation through The Message of the Cross.

Am I on the path?, Church / Body of Christ, Jesus Christ / Yeshua, Marriage

Pursue Both Spouse and Savior With Passion And Admiration

If you browse or study Song of Solomon you will likely come across the thought that it not only represents the love and passion of a husband and wife for one another, but also picks up on the metaphor raised elsewhere in scripture of the body of Christ as the bride and Christ as the husband.

With both in mind note the passion in Song of Solomon 5. Note the anxiety and torment of separation. Note how we are to look upon our spouse and savior… with admiration. With Christ, there are no flaws; some would think that is easy to admire. Take care, however, because the world is constantly trying to redefine what is right and good and then make it appear that Christ and those who follow Him are bad. Also, we are vulnerable to acknowledging His good and admirable traits, but sometimes without true passion to pursue Him. We may not give Him our full attention and focus.

With our spouses, of course we all have flaws. While flaws need to be acknowledged, prayed for, and dealt with, let us focus on those things that are admirable about our spouse and do so passionately.

Song of Solomon 5

The Torment of Separation

     1“I have come into my garden, my sister, my bride;
I have gathered my myrrh along with my balsam.
I have eaten my honeycomb and my honey;
I have drunk my wine and my milk.
Eat, friends;
Drink and imbibe deeply, O lovers.”

      2“I was asleep but my heart was awake.
A voice! My beloved was knocking:
‘Open to me, my sister, my darling,
My dove, my perfect one!
For my head is drenched with dew,
My locks with the damp of the night.’

      3“I have taken off my dress,
How can I put it on again?
I have washed my feet,
How can I dirty them again?

      4“My beloved extended his hand through the opening,
And my feelings were aroused for him.

      5“I arose to open to my beloved;
And my hands dripped with myrrh,
And my fingers with liquid myrrh,
On the handles of the bolt.

      6“I opened to my beloved,
But my beloved had turned away and had gone!
My heart went out to him as he spoke.
I searched for him but I did not find him;
I called him but he did not answer me.

      7“The watchmen who make the rounds in the city found me,
They struck me and wounded me;
The guardsmen of the walls took away my shawl from me.

      8“I adjure you, O daughters of Jerusalem,
If you find my beloved,
As to what you will tell him:
For I am lovesick.”

      9“What kind of beloved is your beloved,
O most beautiful among women?
What kind of beloved is your beloved,
That thus you adjure us?”

Admiration by the Bride

     10“My beloved is dazzling and ruddy,
Outstanding among ten thousand.

      11“His head is like gold, pure gold;
His locks are like clusters of dates
And black as a raven.

      12“His eyes are like doves
Beside streams of water,
Bathed in milk,
And reposed in their setting.

      13“His cheeks are like a bed of balsam,
Banks of sweet-scented herbs;
His lips are lilies
Dripping with liquid myrrh.

      14“His hands are rods of gold
Set with beryl;
His abdomen is carved ivory
Inlaid with sapphires.

      15“His legs are pillars of alabaster
Set on pedestals of pure gold;
His appearance is like Lebanon
Choice as the cedars.

      16“His mouth is full of sweetness.
And he is wholly desirable.
This is my beloved and this is my friend,
O daughters of Jerusalem.”

Don’t get lost in the metaphors used that may not resonate today the same way they did when written. Focus on the desire, the passion, the pursuit of spouse and savior. Then reflect on your life and consider if you are pursuing your spouse and your savior with that kind of passion. If not, ask God to help you and start focusing your mind on what is good and admirable about each as you pursue them more passionately in the future.

Shalom. May the grace and peace of our Lord, Yeshua, be with you. Devotion by John in service to Christ

Do you know for sure if you will go to heaven or hell when you die? Are you experiencing in your life the peace and joy of a personal relationship with our Creator and Father? Learn more about salvation through The Message of the Cross.

 

Jesus Christ / Yeshua, Loving / Kind, Marriage

Be Passionate in Your Feelings Toward Your Spouse and Toward Jesus

Some of the specific poetic language may not resonate in our time and culture (e.g. your hair is like a flock of goats), but don’t miss the sentiment of the passage. Solomon is truly excited about his bride, and yes it is ok to appreciate physical beauty in addition to beauty within the person, especially when directed at your spouse.

Song Of Solomon 4

Solomon’s Love Expressed 

     1“How beautiful you are, my darling,
How beautiful you are!
Your eyes are like doves behind your veil;
Your hair is like a flock of goats
That have descended from Mount Gilead.

      2“Your teeth are like a flock of newly shorn ewes
Which have come up from their washing,
All of which bear twins,
And not one among them has lost her young.

      3“Your lips are like a scarlet thread,
And your mouth is lovely.
Your temples are like a slice of a pomegranate
Behind your veil.

      4“Your neck is like the tower of David,
Built with rows of stones
On which are hung a thousand shields,
All the round shields of the mighty men.

      5“Your two breasts are like two fawns,
Twins of a gazelle
Which feed among the lilies.

      6“Until the cool of the day
When the shadows flee away,
I will go my way to the mountain of myrrh
And to the hill of frankincense.

      7“You are altogether beautiful, my darling,
And there is no blemish in you.

      8“Come with me from Lebanon, my bride,
May you come with me from Lebanon.
Journey down from the summit of Amana,
From the summit of Senir and Hermon,
From the dens of lions,
From the mountains of leopards.

      9“You have made my heart beat faster, my sister, my bride;
You have made my heart beat faster with a single glance of your eyes,
With a single strand of your necklace.

      10“How beautiful is your love, my sister, my bride!
How much better is your love than wine,
And the fragrance of your oils
Than all kinds of spices!

      11“Your lips, my bride, drip honey;
Honey and milk are under your tongue,
And the fragrance of your garments is like the fragrance of Lebanon.

      12“A garden locked is my sister, my bride,
A rock garden locked, a spring sealed up.

      13“Your shoots are an orchard of pomegranates
With choice fruits, henna with nard plants,

      14Nard and saffron, calamus and cinnamon,
With all the trees of frankincense,
Myrrh and aloes, along with all the finest spices.

      15“You are a garden spring,
A well of fresh water,
And streams flowing from Lebanon.”

      16“Awake, O north wind,
And come, wind of the south;
Make my garden breathe out fragrance,
Let its spices be wafted abroad.
May my beloved come into his garden
And eat its choice fruits!”

Let us all seek to care for both our internal and external beauty. Let us be good stewards of our bodies and our spirits. Let us seek to love our spouses and be excited about them and by them.  Continue to invest in the relationship over time.

Also, try to keep in mind that our relationship with Christ is compared metaphorically to a husband and wife with Christ as the husband and the church as the bride. We can be reminded that Jesus loves us, not in a sexual way, but the metaphor holds. He wants to be close to us. We should want to pursue Him as well and draw near.

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Do you know for sure if you will go to heaven or hell when you die? Are you experiencing in your life the peace and joy of a personal relationship with our Creator and Father? Learn more about salvation through The Message of the Cross.