Category Archives: Children

Receive David’s Advice to His Son Like it Was Directed at You

We have previously studied 1 Chronicles 22 from the perspective of one who is great, like David, playing a supportive role to honor God, even though he wanted to play a lead role in building the temple. He did not go halfway. His focus was on bringing glory to God, not himself. David made ample preparations to set up Solomon for success in the mission that he wanted for himself.

This time we will focus in on the advice that David gave to his son Solomon. David was a great king and despite many mistakes, he was a man after God’s own heart (1 Samuel 13:14, Acts 13:22). When he sinned, he repented. He gave much glory to the LORD and had a very open and close relationship with Yahweh.

1 Chronicles 22

David Prepares for Temple Building

      1Then David said, “This is the house of the LORD God, and this is the altar of burnt offering for Israel.”

      2So David gave orders to gather the foreigners who were in the land of Israel, and he set stonecutters to hew out stones to build the house of God. 3David prepared large quantities of iron to make the nails for the doors of the gates and for the clamps, and more bronze than could be weighed; 4and timbers of cedar logs beyond number, for the Sidonians and Tyrians brought large quantities of cedar timber to David. 5David said, “My son Solomon is young and inexperienced, and the house that is to be built for the LORD shall be exceedingly magnificent, famous and glorious throughout all lands. Therefore now I will make preparation for it.” So David made ample preparations before his death.

Solomon Charged with the Task

      6Then he called for his son Solomon, and charged him to build a house for the LORD God of Israel. 7David said to Solomon, “My son, I had intended to build a house to the name of the LORD my God. 8“But the word of the LORD came to me, saying, ‘You have shed much blood and have waged great wars; you shall not build a house to My name, because you have shed so much blood on the earth before Me. 9‘Behold, a son will be born to you, who shall be a man of rest; and I will give him rest from all his enemies on every side; for his name shall be Solomon, and I will give peace and quiet to Israel in his days. 10‘He shall build a house for My name, and he shall be My son and I will be his father; and I will establish the throne of his kingdom over Israel forever.’ 11“Now, my son, the LORD be with you that you may be successful, and build the house of the LORD your God just as He has spoken concerning you. 12“Only the LORD give you discretion and understanding, and give you charge over Israel, so that you may keep the law of the LORD your God. 13“Then you will prosper, if you are careful to observe the statutes and the ordinances which the LORD commanded Moses concerning Israel. Be strong and courageous, do not fear nor be dismayed. 14“Now behold, with great pains I have prepared for the house of the LORD 100,000 talents of gold and 1,000,000 talents of silver, and bronze and iron beyond weight, for they are in great quantity; also timber and stone I have prepared, and you may add to them. 15“Moreover, there are many workmen with you, stonecutters and masons of stone and carpenters, and all men who are skillful in every kind of work. 16“Of the gold, the silver and the bronze and the iron there is no limit. Arise and work, and may the LORD be with you.”

      17David also commanded all the leaders of Israel to help his son Solomon, saying, 18“Is not the LORD your God with you? And has He not given you rest on every side? For He has given the inhabitants of the land into my hand, and the land is subdued before the LORD and before His people. 19“Now set your heart and your soul to seek the LORD your God; arise, therefore, and build the sanctuary of the LORD God, so that you may bring the ark of the covenant of the LORD and the holy vessels of God into the house that is to be built for the name of the LORD.”

What advice did David give to his own son? We should probably receive it as if it was given to us directly.

  •  11“Now, my son, the LORD be with you that you may be successful, and build the house of the LORD your God just as He has spoken concerning you.

David knew it was important for Solomon to live in such a way that the LORD would be with him. This is key in accomplishing what the LORD calls us to do. We are not to try to go do it on our own. Ask and wholeheartedly seek the LORD. It should not be an afterthought, but rather a priority.

  •  12“Only the LORD give you discretion and understanding, and give you charge over Israel, so that you may keep the law of the LORD your God. 13“Then you will prosper, if you are careful to observe the statutes and the ordinances which the LORD commanded Moses concerning Israel. Be strong and courageous, do not fear nor be dismayed.

Seek wisdom and discernment from the LORD. Seek His help in whatever your responsibility may be. For Solomon, it was ruling Israel. For many of us it may include spouse, children, ministry, community, and work.

Observe the statutes and ordinances the LORD commanded. This is not just the 10 commandments, but all the statutes and ordinances of the Law. Christianity has not replaced the Law of God. In Messiah, we are grafted in to Israel. We should follow the same law that Jesus did when he was judged to have lived a sinless life. We do need to understand more detail on this matter, as it can seem complicated. There are some parts of the Law which we can no longer follow. To learn more, read Understanding the Law. What Does it Mean for Us Today?

Notice this is not always easy. David implores Solomon to be strong and courageous right after telling him to obey the Law. People will come against you and try to convince you to live another way. This reminds me of the guidance Joshua received from the LORD in Joshua 1:6-9.

6“Be strong and courageous, for you shall give this people possession of the land which I swore to their fathers to give them. 7“Only be strong and very courageous; be careful to do according to all the law which Moses My servant commanded you; do not turn from it to the right or to the left, so that you may have success wherever you go. 8“This book of the law shall not depart from your mouth, but you shall meditate on it day and night, so that you may be careful to do according to all that is written in it; for then you will make your way prosperous, and then you will have success. 9“Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous! Do not tremble or be dismayed, for the LORD your God is with you wherever you go.”

  •  19“Now set your heart and your soul to seek the LORD your God

This last piece of advice is aimed at the leaders of Israel rather than Solomon, but was to good to leave out.

Reflect prayerfully on this advice as if it was directed at you. Ask the Spirit to reveal to you any areas of your life which you should make changes.

I invite you to pray with me:

Father, thank You for Your written word to lead and guide us. Help us to have wisdom and discernment to understand how You want us to live generally and specifically for each of us. Help us to be strong and courageous. Draw us to seek You wholeheartedly. Please walk with Your people and help us to walk in righteousness. Amen. 

 Shalom

Devotion by John in service to Christ

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Do you know for sure if you will go to heaven or hell when you die? Are you experiencing in your life the peace and joy of a personal relationship with our Creator and Father? Learn more about salvation through The Message of the Cross.

Yeshua Is the Passover Lamb

As the final days of his earthly ministry were passing, Yeshua led His disciples to prepare to celebrate Passover and the Feast of Unleavened Bread. Think about that for a few moments. Yeshua, God himself living among us, chose to spend some of the closing moments of His brief earthly ministry in preparation of Passover. It was clearly important to him and for good reason.

The timing is not coincidental that Yeshua would be sacrificed for our sins at Passover time. It was intended that way by our Creator. Passover not only reminds us of deliverance from bondage in Egypt but also foreshadows our deliverance from the bondage of sin through the sacrifice of Yeshua on the cross. Yeshua was sacrificed as our Passover lamb… dying for our sins so we can be set free from sin and death.

Mark 14:12-21

The Last Passover

12On the first day of Unleavened Bread, when the Passover lamb was being sacrificed, His disciples said to Him, “Where do You want us to go and prepare for You to eat the Passover?” 13And He sent two of His disciples and said to them, “Go into the city, and a man will meet you carrying a pitcher of water; follow him; 14and wherever he enters, say to the owner of the house, ‘The Teacher says, “Where is My guest room in which I may eat the Passover with My disciples?”’ 15“And he himself will show you a large upper room furnished and ready; prepare for us there.” 16The disciples went out and came to the city, and found it just as He had told them; and they prepared the Passover.

17When it was evening He came with the twelve. 18As they were reclining at the table and eating, Jesus said, “Truly I say to you that one of you will betray Me—one who is eating with Me.” 19They began to be grieved and to say to Him one by one, “Surely not I?” 20And He said to them, “It is one of the twelve, one who dips with Me in the bowl. 21“For the Son of Man is to go just as it is written of Him; but woe to that man by whom the Son of Man is betrayed! It would have been good for that man if he had not been born.”

These celebrations are not “Jewish” tradition. They are not just somehow a meaningless or obsolete instruction from our Creator either. Now we who believe in Yeshua as Messiah have more reason to celebrate it than ever before! Passover and Unleavened Bread are part of God’s tradition for celebrating and remembering our deliverance from sin through Christ! It is a wonderful way to teach our children about the Creator’s relationship with His people.

Exodus 13:6-10

6“For seven days you shall eat unleavened bread, and on the seventh day there shall be a feast to the LORD. 7“Unleavened bread shall be eaten throughout the seven days; and nothing leavened shall be seen among you, nor shall any leaven be seen among you in all your borders. 8“You shall tell your son on that day, saying, ‘It is because of what the LORD did for me when I came out of Egypt.’ 9“And it shall serve as a sign to you on your hand, and as a reminder on your forehead, that the law of the LORD may be in your mouth; for with a powerful hand the LORD brought you out of Egypt. 10“Therefore, you shall keep this ordinance at its appointed time from year to year.

We should enjoy taking part in our Father’s appointed times rather than creating our own based on the traditions of men. It is not just that He tells us to… that got me started to look into it. Now I see how powerfully these celebrations tie into the core element of my faith in Jesus Christ as Savior and what a wonderful way it is to teach my children. As I reflected personally in this regard, it occurred to me. God has some pretty good ideas. (That is quite an understatement!)

I invite you to take some small steps even today to learn more about Passover and the Feast of Unleavened Bread and how it is not only a celebration of Yahweh freeing His people out of slavery in Egypt, but also a celebration of our being freed from bondage to sin through the death and resurrection of Yeshua!

I invite you to pray with me:

Father, thank You for preparing a path to redemption and reconciliation for us with You. Thank You for sending Your son, Yeshua, to die for our sins so that we can be forgiven. Help me to have a thankful and joyful heart and fully submit to You! Amen. 

To study more on this topic, please review our category of posts relating to Holidays/Traditions (scroll down to move from one post to another) and consider the following.

Here are a few resources where you can learn more about the Moedim, the Creator’s calendar (often called the “Jewish” calendar).

 

I encourage you to invest time studying this topic and do not dismiss it. I have found it to be powerful in transforming the focus of our celebrations off of ourselves and rightly focused toward our Creator and Savior!

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Have you submitted your life to Jesus Christ? If you die today, do you know for sure that you would be with God in heaven? Learn more about salvation through The Message of the Cross.

Foundation 6: Raising Godly Children in Marriage

This is part 6 of a 9-part series I am sharing from Bible.org. (Link to Foundation 5a: Friends of the Opposite Sex (in Marriage).

Walking through this series with your spouse or future spouse will bring you closer together in understanding one another and God’s intent for marriage.

—Link to Bible.org: 6. Raising Godly Children in Marriage | Bible.org

—Link to PDF: 6. Foundation Six_ Raising Godly Children in Marriage _ Bible.org

How do we raise godly children in marriage? One of the reasons God brings two people together in marriage is for the purpose of raising godly children, children who look like him. Malachi 2:15 says:

Has not the LORD made them one? In flesh and spirit they are his. And why one? Because he was seeking godly offspring. So guard yourself in your spirit, and do not break faith with the wife of your youth.

But how is this accomplished? Obviously, the only perfect model of parenting is God the Father, and therefore, as we look at him and his Word, we can discern principles about raising godly children.

In Order to Raise Godly Children, Parents Must Model Godliness

In order to raise godly children, by necessity, parents must model godliness. Children often model the character of their parents. Listen to how Paul challenged Christians: “Be imitators of God, therefore, as dearly loved children and live a life of love, just as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us as a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God” (Ephesians 5:1-2). He called them to imitate God, their father, as dear children and to live a life of love. As a parent, God is loving, righteous, holy, etc., and therefore, his children will in some ways reflect his character.

Similarly, parents must be people of character if they are going to raise godly children. Children raised in a loving home, by parents with character, typically mimic the virtues demonstrated by their parents. In contrast, parents who are not around, who lack self-control in their speech or with their anger, etc., produce the same character in their children. They won’t be able to cultivate righteousness in them. In fact, the hypocrisy will only lead them to rebel.

Consider how Paul challenged Timothy, the pastor of the church of Ephesus: “Watch your life and doctrine closely. Persevere in them, because if you do, you will save both yourself and your hearers” (1 Timothy 4:16). Paul told Timothy to be careful about his doctrine (what he taught) and his life (how he lived), because if he did, he would save those who listened to him. Essentially, it could be said this way, “Timothy, if what you say doesn’t match your actions, you will destroy those who follow you.” And it is the same for parents. Many parents destroy their children because they have a speech that doesn’t match their actions. They tell their daughter, “Stop cursing” as expletives fly out of their mouth. They tell their son, “Control your anger!” as they scream at the top of their lungs. The dad tells the kids, “Stop fighting at school,” though he fights with mom at home all the time. In the same way, when parents teach their children to evangelize, serve the church, or care for the poor, but never practice these, then the children likewise will not practice them as well.

Parents who don’t model godliness will not be able to cultivate it in their children. And sadly for Christian parents, the consequences can be disastrous; many children fall away from God all together because of the hypocrisy seen in their homes. In order to raise godly children, parents must model godly character.

In Order to Raise Godly Children, Parents Must Train Their Children in God’s Word

In order for parents to raise godly children, they must not only demonstrate godly character but also teach them Scripture. This is how God the Father develops godliness in us. Ephesians 5:26 describes how Christ washes the church with the water of the Word to make her blameless and holy. Parents must do the same with their children.

Consider what the father, presumably Solomon, said to his son in Proverbs 2:1-13:

My son, if you accept my words and store up my commands within you, turning your ear to wisdom and applying your heart to understanding, and if you call out for insight and cry aloud for understanding, and if you look for it as for silver and search for it as for hidden treasure, then you will understand the fear of the LORD and find the knowledge of God. For the LORD gives wisdom, and from his mouth come knowledge and understanding. He holds victory in store for the upright, he is a shield to those whose walk is blameless, for he guards the course of the just and protects the way of his faithful ones. Then you will understand what is right and just and fair—every good path. For wisdom will enter your heart, and knowledge will be pleasant to your soul. Discretion will protect you, and understanding will guard you. Wisdom will save you from the ways of wicked men, from men whose words are perverse, who leave the straight paths to walk in dark ways…

The father told his son to turn his ear to wisdom, to call out for it, to cry aloud for it, to look for it as silver and hidden treasure, and if he did, he would understand the fear of the Lord and find the knowledge of God. This wisdom would enter his heart and be pleasant to him. It would protect him, guard him, and save him.

When the father calls for the son to seek after wisdom, this primarily refers to knowing and obeying God, as revealed through his Word. Fearing the Lord is called the beginning of wisdom (Prov 9:10). Throughout the Proverbs, this father sits with his son and teaches him the importance of wisdom. He trumpets the benefits of it and seeks to train his son in its ways, so he can be protected and guarded. This is how it should be with every parent. The way they train their children in wisdom (godliness) is by emphasizing the importance of Scripture, teaching their children to memorize it, to apply it, to know and to love God. This must be the daily endeavor of every parent as they aim to raise godly children. The Word of God must be the lifeline of the home.

This is exactly what Moses commanded Israel’s parents in Deuteronomy 6:6-9. He said:

These commandments that I give you today are to be upon your hearts. Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. Tie them as symbols on your hands and bind them on your foreheads. Write them on the doorframes of your houses and on your gates.

Parents were called to impress the Word of God upon the hearts of their children by talking about it at home, when they went walking, when they went to bed, and when they got up. They were to tie Scriptures on their hands and their heads and to write it on the doorframes of their homes and the gates.

Parents can apply these principles very literally. They should have times of morning and nightly devotions with their kids where they read the Word of God, discuss it, and pray. They should talk about God’s Word when considering their child’s behavior (or other children). They should talk about God’s Word as they critique an inappropriate commercial or scene in a movie. Parents should wisely lead children to recognize sin, our need for the gospel—Christ’s death and resurrection for man’s sin, and ultimately genuine acceptance of Christ’s lordship. As children mature and want to go here or there or do this or that, parents should encourage them to pray to God and seek his wisdom. Parents who are trying to raise godly children must saturate their home with the Bible, as well as practice the truths in it.

Some may call this sheltering, but it isn’t. These kids are still called to be salt and light in the world—to be a blessing to it. However, they are not called to be part of the world. They should think differently because they have a different purpose, and this all starts with a home that is saturated with God’s Word.

Are you willing to saturate your home with the Word of God? It is the Word of God that trains children and equips them for all righteousness (2 Tim 3:16-17).

In Order to Raise Godly Children, Parents Must Discipline Their Children

In order to raise godly children, parents must discipline them. The word “discipline” tends to have a negative connotation but it shouldn’t. It is a rich word. It means: “training to act in accordance with rules”, “activity, exercise, or regimen that develops or improves a skill”, or “punishment inflicted by way of correction or training.”1

Since God is the ultimate Father, we must consider how God disciplines us in order to discern how we should discipline our children. Hebrews 12:5-11 says this about God’s discipline:

And you have forgotten that word of encouragement that addresses you as sons: ‘My son, do not make light of the Lord’s discipline, and do not lose heart when he rebukes you, because the Lord disciplines those he loves, and he punishes everyone he accepts as a son.’ Endure hardship as discipline; God is treating you as sons. For what son is not disciplined by his father? If you are not disciplined (and everyone undergoes discipline), then you are illegitimate children and not true sons. Moreover, we have all had human fathers who disciplined us and we respected them for it. How much more should we submit to the Father of our spirits and live! Our fathers disciplined us for a little while as they thought best; but God disciplines us for our good, that we may share in his holiness. No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it.

Hebrews says that every father disciplines his children (v. 7). It is mentioned as an expectation. God disciplines his children and so should every parent. God disciplines through trials and various hardships he allows Christians to go through. Their purpose is holiness (v. 10). In the same way, good parenting disciplines the children for the purpose of “training” and making them righteous (v. 11).

It should be noticed that this passage does not distinguish between punishment for sin (punitive) and hard times that God uses to train us (non-punitive). The writer of Hebrews simply says, “Endure hardship as discipline, God is treating you as sons” (v. 7). The writer sees God in control of all hardship, whether that be hardship as a consequence of sin (punitive) or as a consequence of living in a world full of sin (non-punitive). Regardless, the sovereign God uses all hardship as discipline to train his children in holiness and to make them into the image of his Son (cf. Rom 8:28-29).

Non-Punitive Disciplines

Similarly, parents must initiate various non-punitive disciplines that will encourage holiness in their children. For example, my parents made me participate in sports when I was young, not only to gain broad experiences, but to develop character traits such as patience, team work, humility, etc. At other times, my mom would tell me I could not go outside until I had read a book for an hour. This discipline was implemented in order to help me learn to enjoy reading. In addition, I was given chores to learn how to work hard, to manage time, and to learn the value of a dollar, as I was given allowance. On other occasions, I would have to finish an endeavor I started, but did not like, simply to teach me endurance—to not quit when things were difficult.

In the same way, God brings (or allows) non-punitive disciplines in our lives not because we’re in sin but for training, in order to make us holier. Sometimes, he puts us in waiting seasons to develop patience. Sometimes, he brings us through hardship, like Job, to develop perseverance and to know God in a more intimate way. The hardship isn’t necessarily a consequence of sin; it is allowed in order to foster faith in God and godly character traits. Similarly, as parents, we must stretch our children through various disciplines to help them grow.

Parents should wisely introduce various forms of discipline to their children for the sake of character development. These may include disciplines like learning to play an instrument, playing a sport, completing chores, working a job, reading, etc. It should include disciplines such as limited time playing video games, being on the Internet, watching TV and movies, staying up late, and even eating healthy. As a pastor working with college students, I have watched students fail out of school because they played video games all day or watched movies all night. Discipline in these areas of life starts in the home. Parents who do not implement these types of disciplines may raise children with no discipline at all, which will eventually result in negative consequences in their lives.

Punitive Disciplines

As far as punitive discipline, the writer of Hebrews shares two techniques that God uses in Hebrews 12:6. These techniques are more clearly seen in the KJV. It says, “My son, despise not thou the chastening of the Lord, nor faint when thou art rebuked of him: For whom the Lord loveth he chasteneth, and scourgeth every son whom he receiveth.” There is a clear heightening of severity with each discipline. Chastening is a form of communication used to correct, such as a rebuke. As a discipline for sin, God will rebuke us through his Word, maybe through a sermon or a friend, calling us to repent and do what is right. If rebuke does not work, God then brings punishment. He scourges believers, which refers to a whipping. A believer who is in sin will experience many difficulties brought for the purpose of correction. For example, when Jonah rebelled against God’s words, the Lord brought a storm into his life that almost killed him. In 1 Corinthians 11, the members of the Corinthian church experienced sickness, weariness, and even death for taking the Lord’s Supper in an unworthy manner (v. 29-31).

Similarly, parents must develop a system of discipline that increases in severity, which includes corrective communication and punishment, to foster holiness in the life of their child. Scripture teaches that “Foolishness is bound in the heart of a child; but the rod of correction shall drive it far from him” (Prov 22:15). Foolishness in the Bible refers to disobedience to God and his Word. Psalm 14:1 says, “The fool says in his heart there is no God.” Parents must understand that foolishness is bound up in the hearts of their children. Children are intrinsically wired to disobey God and his established authorities—they want their own way. If not disciplined, children will live a life of rebellion against God and all authority.

Proverbs 23:14 says this about disciplining a child: “Punish him with the rod and save his soul from death.” What type of death is the Proverb talking about? No doubt, this refers to a potential early physical death, but it also refers to spiritual death—separation from God (cf. Rom 6:23). Disciplining our children prepares them to live a long life (cf. Ex 20:12) and to know and follow God, as they eventually accept the gospel and submit to Christ’s Lordship. An undisciplined child will be prone to continue in foolishness and never follow Christ. Discipline is not only important for a child’s earthly life but for his eternal destiny.

Wise parents realize this and work hard to “drive” foolishness far from their children through measured discipline (Prov 22:15). Parents should discipline their children, not because they have been inconvenienced or embarrassed, but because their children have disobeyed and dishonored God. They discipline them out of love. Proverbs 13:24 says, “He who spares the rod hates his son, but he who loves him is careful to discipline him.” This endeavor takes hard work and perseverance. Because of its importance, it deserves strategic planning and a partnership between both parents.

The two aspects of punitive discipline God uses on us, as described in Hebrews, are communication (rebuke) and punishment (scourges). The first step in punitive discipline should be consistent, corrective communication. Parents must expose what the child did wrong, why it was wrong, and warn of consequences—both short term and long term. When the child continues in sin, parents should lovingly punish to deter from further sin, even as God does with us.

The secret to discipline is a healthy balance between corrective communication and punishment. When children are young, there should be less reasoning and more punishment so that they learn obedience. As they grow older, there should be more communication and less punishment. If parents don’t teach them obedience through punishment when they are young, they won’t respond to communication and reasoning when they are old. There is a small window for parents to ingrain obedience in children while they are young (Prov 22:6); when they are older, it will be much harder.

What types of punishment should parents use?

In Proverbs, we continually see the word “rod” used in reference to disciplining children, as previously quoted. Let’s listen to a few of these verses again.

Do not withhold discipline from a child; if you punish him with the rod, he will not die. Punish him with the rod and save his soul from death.
Proverbs 23:13-14

He who spares the rod hates his son, but he who loves him is careful to discipline him.
Proverbs 13:24

The rod of correction imparts wisdom, but a child left to himself disgraces his mother.
Proverbs 29:15

When the writers of Proverbs use the word “rod”, it seems to primarily refer to forms of corporal punishment. There are several evidences for this. First, corporal punishment was a typical discipline in ancient societies including that of Israel (cf. Deut 25:3). Second, the fact that it is repeated so many times in the Proverbs makes it unlikely for the rod to be merely symbolic. Third, some verses clearly refer to corporal punishment. For example, Proverbs 23:14 says, “If you strike him with the rod, you will save his soul from Sheol” (ESV).

Due to the deplorable amount of child abuse happening in societies, spankings are commonly looked down upon and even considered barbaric. However, physical abuse, or any kind of abuse for that matter, was never God’s plan for training children. God teaches the rod should be an act of love (Prov 13:24). It is loving parents seeking to save their children from death (23:14).

How should punitive discipline (including spankings) be administered to children? Here are a few guidelines.

1. Discipline should never be given in anger.

Scripture says, “man’s anger does not bring about the righteous life that God desires” (James 1:20). When parents yell at their children or spank them in anger, they are abusing them. It will not produce the righteous life that God desires in children. Parents should be calm and measured when disciplining a child.

2. Discipline should be equal to the sin.

In the Mosaic law, civil discipline had to be equal to the crime; it was to be “an eye for an eye, and a tooth for a tooth” (Ex 21:24). This is also true in disciplining children. Parents must wisely consider the consequences for each infraction. If discipline is unfair, it may result in rebellion.

In addition, when deciding the punishment, parents must discern the difference between childishness and foolishness. Small children are going to spill milk; that is childishness. But when they spill the milk, were they doing it to be rebellious? Foolishness should be punished, and childishness should be corrected.

3. Discipline should be consistent.

When a parent continually tells their children, “If you do this, then I will discipline you when we get home,” and the parent does nothing, then children learn that the parent doesn’t always mean what he or she says, and therefore, they don’t always have to obey. Also, if the parent doesn’t discipline the child for turning on the TV when they should be sleeping, but then does the next time, it confuses the child. Discipline must be consistent. In addition, the giving of discipline should also be consistent between the parents. Parents must present a unified front; otherwise, it will promote manipulation from the child and cause discord within the marriage.

4. Discipline should create intimacy instead of distance.

When a child is being disobedient to his parent, distance is created in the relationship. However, when the parent disciplines the child, it shouldn’t create a greater distance—it should restore intimacy. This is how God’s discipline functions with us. Sin separates us from God, but his discipline is meant to draw us back into intimacy. This is another reason why parents shouldn’t discipline when angry or give unfair disciplines; it further alienates the child instead of drawing him closer.

In developing a system of punitive discipline for our children, like our heavenly Father, parents must consistently correct their children through communication. They must teach them what sin is and why it is wrong, especially from a biblical perspective. They must warn children so they can turn away from temptation. When children sin, parents must consistently punish them in order to train them to honor God.

Parents must implement both punitive and non-punitive disciplines in order to promote holiness in their children. Non-punitive disciplines are as simple as reading an hour a day, learning to play an instrument, playing a sport, having limited time on electronics, eating healthy, etc. These will promote virtues like teamwork, perseverance, self-control, and moderation which will bless them for the rest of their lives.

What types of discipline will you implement in the lives of your children to promote godly character in them?

In Order to Raise Godly Children, Parents Must Avoid Provoking Their Children to Anger

As we consider discipline, it is very important for parents to not discipline children in a way that provokes rebellion. Colossians 3:21 says, “Fathers, do not embitter your children, or they will become discouraged.” In this text, Paul spoke to fathers and commanded them to not embitter their children lest they become discouraged or “lose heart,” as translated in the NASB. This is not simply referring to a child getting upset, for this is inevitable. It has to do with a deep–rooted, settled anger that stays in this child and affects his character for the rest of his life. This anger will result in rebellion both towards the parents and towards God, and may keep them from ever becoming the righteous seed that God desires.

The word “father” can also be translated “parents” (cf. Hebrews 11:23). This sin is committed not only by fathers; it is also committed by mothers. It is possible for parents to embitter their children to the point where they rebel.

How do parents embitter their children? This can happen in many ways.

1. Parents embitter their children by not disciplining them.

This is one of the quickest ways to develop bitterness in children. Spoiled children are thankless and bitter. Because they get their way all the time, they are bitter whenever any authority does not give them what they want or when life becomes difficult. As mentioned, Proverbs 22:15 says, “Folly is bound up in the heart of a child, but the rod of discipline will drive it far from him” (Prov. 22:15). Parents embitter them by never driving the foolishness, the sin, out of their hearts through discipline.

2. Parents embitter their children by abusing them or giving improper discipline.

Abuse, either verbally or physically, sows seeds of anger or hatred in the hearts of children. The anger sown is hard to remove. Many times these children abuse others because of the anger in them.

However, we see this not only as a result of abuse but improper discipline as well. When a parent unwisely uses his anger, it trains his child to unwisely use his also. For example, the parent becomes angry and curses at him, criticizes him, or even harshly disciplines him. Even if the punishment is just, the improper use of anger trains the child. The child learns, “When I am angry it is OK to curse; it is OK to hit somebody; it is OK to go crazy.” He never learns how to properly control his anger and, therefore, struggles with anger throughout his life.

3. Parents embitter their children by neglecting them.

Many children grow bitter because their parents are never around. Consequently, they lack love and affection causing them to grow bitter. Some parents neglect their children for work. They work long hours in order to achieve a certain amount of success, and this keeps them away from home. Ultimately, this hurts children both emotionally and spiritually.

Sadly, in our society many parents neglect their children by sending them away to extensive education or extracurricular programs. Many times these programs are meant to compensate for their lack of presence. It is not God’s will for teachers, coaches, or babysitters to raise children. That is why he gave children to the parents. Certainly, these people should play a role, but it is important for parents to be the primary influence in the lives of their children. Parents must be careful not to neglect their children.

4. Parents embitter their children by never encouraging them and showing them affection.

We saw this in the story of Martin Luther. He had a father who never encouraged him or showed him love. Listen to what commentator William Barclay said:

It is one of the tragic facts of religious history that Martin Luther’s father was so stern to him that, all his life, Luther found it difficult to pray: ‘Our Father.’ The word father in his mind represented nothing but severity. The duty of the parent is discipline, but it is also encouragement. Luther himself said: ‘Spare the rod and spoil the child. It is true. But beside the rod keep an apple to give him when he does well.’2

Healthy parents not only discipline their children but also reward them. Parents reward their children when they do well and discipline them when they do wrong. Children start to learn fairness by this balanced approach.

5. Parents embitter their children by showing favoritism toward other siblings.

We get a good picture of this in the story of Jacob, the father of Joseph. Jacob gave Joseph the robe of many colors, showing special favor to this son above the other eleven. This embittered the older siblings against the father and also against Joseph. Later, they kidnapped and sold Joseph into slavery out of anger (Gen 37).

How often do siblings become embittered against one another because of unwise parenting? These children grow up disliking one another. “Mother always thought you were the prettiest!” “Dad always liked you because you were the smartest and the most athletic!” This happens all the time, as parents embitter their children by showing favoritism.

Training children is a delicate ministry and parents tend to lose balance. Some parents become permissive, leading them into anger and rebellion. Others become authoritarians, leading to the same. In our parenting, God has called us to not embitter our children. When we embitter them, we can’t lead them to God, which was the very reason God gave them to us.

In Order to Raise Godly Children, Parents Must Know Their Children

Finally, in order to raise godly children, parents must know them. As with all the points, this is a reflection of how God develops godliness in us as his children. He knows us. Listen to what God said to Jeremiah when he called him to be a prophet to the nations: “Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, before you were born I set you apart; I appointed you as a prophet to the nations” (Jeremiah 1:5). God knew Jeremiah intimately. Similarly, David spoke of how God knew him in Psalm 139:1: “O LORD, you have searched me and you know me.” To search means to “examine thoroughly.”3 God had examined David thoroughly, he knew him.

Similarly, parents must know their children if they are going to raise them in godliness and lead them into God’s plan for their lives. Proverbs 22:6 says, “Train a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not turn from it.” “In the way he should go” can also be translated as “his way” or “his bend.” The Amplified Bible translates it this way: “Train up a child in the way he should go [and in keeping with his individual gift or bent], and when he is old he will not depart from it.” The word “way” comes from a Hebrew verb used of a bow launching an arrow.4 When a person shoots an arrow, the tension must align with the natural bend in the bow or it will break. This is also true in raising children.

Some parents damage their children by trying to train them in a way God didn’t wire them. They may do this by pushing their kids into the medical field, athletics, etc., even though the children show no aptitude or passion in those areas. God gives us children who are already uploaded with a unique and specific program like a computer. We can’t use software uniquely made for an Apple with a PC. It’s the same with children. Some will be wired towards the arts, technology, or serving ministries. It is the job of parents to get to know the way God wired them, so they can encourage them in those areas.

This can be difficult for parents, especially if their child’s wiring doesn’t fit their expectation or what might be considered successful in society. However, we are called to train a child according to his own way—according to his own bend (Prov 22:6)—not ours’ or others’. Their “way” may not appeal to us, but ultimately, we are raising children for God and to fulfill his calling on their lives. Like Jeremiah, God knew them before they were in the womb (Jer 1:5). Like David, they are fearfully and wonderfully made (Psalm 139:14) and called for a specific work (Eph 2:10). It is the parent’s job to help discern this work and to help the children fulfill it.

In order to know their children and the way they are wired, parents must spend quality time with them. Just like the husband and wife must spend time together to cultivate their marriage, parents should spend quality time with each child. This can become complicated as the number of children grows. Many parents maneuver this by planning weekly or monthly dates with each child. For instance, every Wednesday night will be daddy daughter date, or once a month mom and son will go to their favorite restaurant, etc. Parents must take time to be with their children, to listen to them, to study them, and to have fun with them, ultimately for the purpose of leading them in godliness.

How will you strategically make time to get to know your children so you can more effectively lead them in God’s calling for their lives?

Conclusion

When God made Adam and Eve, it was his will for them to be fruitful and multiply (Gen 1:28). However, they were not just called to give birth to children, but to raise the children to be godly and to honor God with their lives (cf. Mal 2:15). And it’s the same for us as parents.

How can we raise godly children?

    1. In order to raise godly children, parents must model godliness.
    2. In order to raise godly children, parents must train their children in God’s Word.
    3. In order to raise godly children, parents must discipline their children.
    4. In order to raise godly children, parents must avoid provoking their children to anger.
    5. In order to raise godly children, parents must know their children.

Raising Godly Children in Marriage Homework

Answer the questions, then discuss together.

1. What was new or stood out to you in this session? In what ways were you challenged or encouraged? Were there any points/thoughts that you did not agree with?

2. Would you agree that the most important aspect of raising godly children is the parents’ consistency in modeling godliness? Why or why not? Are there areas in your life that you believe will not be a good model for your children? What about your mate? How can you address these areas to present a better model?

3. Moses commanded parents to impress the Word of God upon their own hearts and their children’s (Deut 6:6-9). How are you currently trying to impress the Word of God on your heart? How will you impress the Word of God upon your children’s hearts? What type of practices will you use?

4. How were you disciplined as a child (both punitive and non-punitive)? Do you think it was effective and how so? If not, why not?

5. What are your thoughts about Scripture’s call for parents to use the “rod” to correct children (Prov 22:15)? What types of punitive disciplines do you plan on implementing with your children? How will you implement them?

6. What types of non-punitive disciplines do you plan on implementing with your children? Write down both the discipline and the desired character traits that should come from the discipline (i.e. by giving chores and allowance it will teach the child how to handle money, hard work, etc.). It may prove helpful to brainstorm.

7. Discuss this with your mate and come to some conclusions about types of discipline both non-punitive and punitive. Share conclusions and any anticipated areas of difficulty.

8. How have you seen or experienced children who have been provoked to wrath or rebellion by their parents? How will you protect your children from this?

9. How many children do you plan to have? How will you strategically take time to get to know each child individually?

10. After completing this session, how do you feel God is calling you to pray for your marriage? Spend some time praying.

Continue with Foundation 7: Financial Faithfulness in Marriage.

I invite you to pray with me:

Father, lead and guide Your people who are called by Your name to have wisdom in raising children in marriage. Let us not lean on cultural norms and the ways of men, but rather embrace Your instructions in the Bible. Let our children be a light to others to draw them in. Let our families bring honor and glory to You and Your name as we are holy and set apart from the ways of men. Amen. 

 Shalom

Devotion by John in service to Christ

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Do you know for sure if you will go to heaven or hell when you die? Are you experiencing in your life the peace and joy of a personal relationship with our Creator and Father? Learn more about salvation through The Message of the Cross.

Fathers, Lead Your Children in the Ways of the LORD

2 Kings 21 records the transition of kingship from Hezekiah to Manasseh. It is a stark contrast from righteous to evil.  You can read the full details of the preceding verses by clicking the link below. Verses 19-26 focus on the son of Manasseh. He became king and like his father, did evil in the LORD’s sight. He walked in the ways of his father. Things did not go well for him.

2 Kings 21:19-26

Amon Succeeds Manasseh

      19Amon was twenty-two years old when he became king, and he reigned two years in Jerusalem; and his mother’s name was Meshullemeth the daughter of Haruz of Jotbah. 20He did evil in the sight of the LORD, as Manasseh his father had done. 21For he walked in all the way that his father had walked, and served the idols that his father had served and worshiped them. 22So he forsook the LORD, the God of his fathers, and did not walk in the way of the LORD23The servants of Amon conspired against him and killed the king in his own house. 24Then the people of the land killed all those who had conspired against King Amon, and the people of the land made Josiah his son king in his place. 25Now the rest of the acts of Amon which he did, are they not written in the Book of the Chronicles of the Kings of Judah? 26He was buried in his grave in the garden of Uzza, and Josiah his son became king in his place.1:

As I reflect on this passage, I am struck by the impact that a father can have in shaping the character of his son. There appears to be a clear failure in this area in regards to Hezekiah preparing his son Manasseh to be king and to follow the LORD. Here we see Amon following in the ways of his father to do evil. We see this trend with other kings as well, such as David. They do not appear to have been good fathers, even if they were walking with the LORD.

Do not think that just because you focus on walking with Yahweh, your children are guaranteed to turn out the same way. You must invest time with them. You must be intentional in mentoring and raising them… in loving them. You must teach them to walk in our Father’s ways. You must teach them to be set apart from culture around them.

I invite you to pray with me:

Father, please open my eyes to the needs of my children or other children around me for the influence of a godly father or man in their life. Grant me the courage to step up and take on that challenge for my children and for any others you may put in my path that may not have that godly father. Help me to instruct them in the way they should go so that they would not soon stray from it. Help children who are fatherless or have fathers that are not engaged in leading them to find those godly role models to lead them to You. Amen.

Shalom.

Devotion by John in service to Christ

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Do you know for sure if you will go to heaven or hell when you die? Are you experiencing in your life the peace and joy of a personal relationship with our Creator and Father? Learn more about salvation through The Message of the Cross.

Do Not Be Too Busy for Children

It is often easy for us to get busy pursuing what we think we need to do, including ministry. We can sometimes overlook the children, even our own, to some extent. Yeshua loves children. He does not want us to overlook them. He wants us to make time for them.

Matthew 19:13-15

Jesus Blesses Little Children

      13Then some children were brought to Him so that He might lay His hands on them and pray; and the disciples rebuked them. 14But Jesus said, “Let the children alone, and do not hinder them from coming to Me; for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these.” 15After laying His hands on them, He departed from there.

I invite you to pray with me:

Father, please help me and all your people to look favorably on children, to make time for them, to treat them as having significance and not just being “in the way”. Please especially help parents to embrace their children as a blessing and not look at them as a burden. Amen. 

Shalom

Devotion by John in service to Christ

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Do you know for sure if you will go to heaven or hell when you die? Are you experiencing in your life the peace and joy of a personal relationship with our Creator and Father? Learn more about salvation through The Message of the Cross.

Who Is Greatest in the Kingdom?

Many people have differing ideas of greatness. Sports start, movie stars, politicians… many are held up as great. But by what standard should we judge who is truly great? As for me, I like to use the standard set by Yeshua. Spoiler alert, it is very different than the measure of greatness in the eyes of the world.

Matthew 18:1-5

Rank in the Kingdom

      1At that time the disciples came to Jesus and said, “Who then is greatest in the kingdom of heaven?” 2And He called a child to Himself and set him before them, 3and said, “Truly I say to you, unless you are converted and become like children, you will not enter the kingdom of heaven. 4“Whoever then humbles himself as this child, he is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven. 5“And whoever receives one such child in My name receives Me; 6but whoever causes one of these little ones who believe in Me to stumble, it would be better for him to have a heavy millstone hung around his neck, and to be drowned in the depth of the sea.

Matthew 23:10-12

10“Do not be called leaders; for One is your Leader, that is, Christ. 11“But the greatest among you shall be your servant. 12“Whoever exalts himself shall be humbled; and whoever humbles himself shall be exalted.

So pay attention when the world tells you greatness comes from being a better athlete or better business man or just being wealthy or famous. None of these define greatness in the eyes of God. If you want to set out to be great, ask the LORD’s help and begin by serving others in His name. Humble yourself before God and submit to His word and His guidance for you. In these ways you can be great and you do not need special circumstances, talent, or money to get started!

Shalom

Devotion by John in service to Christ

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Do you know for sure if you will go to heaven or hell when you die? Are you experiencing in your life the peace and joy of a personal relationship with our Creator and Father? Learn more about salvation through The Message of the Cross.

Parents Influence Their Children… for Better, or for Worse

Parents have great influence on the direction in which their children will go.

Provers 22:6

Train up a child in the way he should go, even when he is old he will not depart from it.

We have been reading about Ahab, who was a wicked king and more recently about Jehoshaphat as they joined in war against Aram. We see in 1 Kings 22 now a transition in leadership and we have a chance to reflect on a broader view over the life and reign of two kings.

1 Kings 22:41-53

The New Rulers

      41Now Jehoshaphat the son of Asa became king over Judah in the fourth year of Ahab king of Israel. 42Jehoshaphat was thirty-five years old when he became king, and he reigned twenty-five years in Jerusalem. And his mother’s name was Azubah the daughter of Shilhi. 43He walked in all the way of Asa his father; he did not turn aside from it, doing right in the sight of the LORD. However, the high places were not taken away; the people still sacrificed and burnt incense on the high places. 44Jehoshaphat also made peace with the king of Israel.

      45Now the rest of the acts of Jehoshaphat, and his might which he showed and how he warred, are they not written in the Book of the Chronicles of the Kings of Judah? 46The remnant of the sodomites who remained in the days of his father Asa, he expelled from the land.

      47Now there was no king in Edom; a deputy was king. 48Jehoshaphat made ships of Tarshish to go to Ophir for gold, but they did not go for the ships were broken at Ezion-geber. 49Then Ahaziah the son of Ahab said to Jehoshaphat, “Let my servants go with your servants in the ships.” But Jehoshaphat was not willing. 50And Jehoshaphat slept with his fathers and was buried with his fathers in the city of his father David, and Jehoram his son became king in his place.

      51Ahaziah the son of Ahab became king over Israel in Samaria in the seventeenth year of Jehoshaphat king of Judah, and he reigned two years over Israel. 52He did evil in the sight of the LORD and walked in the way of his father and in the way of his mother and in the way of Jeroboam the son of Nebat, who caused Israel to sin. 53So he served Baal and worshiped him and provoked the LORD God of Israel to anger, according to all that his father had done.

Ahab was wicked. He blamed others, God’s prophets in particular, for the punishment he received from God. Thus, he did not sustainably repent and transform his life and continued to run up against God. We see now his son, Ahaziah, follow in his footsteps and do evil in the sight of the LORD. We should not be surprised as he would have grown up with Ahab and Jezebel as his examples to follow.

On the opposite end of the spectrum, Jehoshaphat followed the ways of his father, Asa, who did what was right in the eyes of the LORD. He even chased the remaining sodomites out of the land, which was good. However, we see where he, like his father before him, accepted the altars in the high places, where people burned incense and made sacrifices, which were not pleasing to the LORD.

In this entire scripture passage we see the strong impact that parents have on their children. Where we set an example of unrighteousness, our children will follow. If we want our children to be righteous in the eyes of the LORD, then so must we be in order to set that example. If we “mostly” or “somewhat” serve the LORD, do not expect our children to do more. If we accept some sin, likely our children will also.

Prayerfully reflect on the example you are setting for your children, or if you have no children, for others around you. What sin are you accepting in your life? What are you going to do about it? Ask God to help you identify changes you need to make and to make those changes. Don’t dismiss wickedness as that stuff people like Ahab do, who reject God. Recognize that folks like Jehoshaphat, who was pleasing to God,  also do things they should not. It would be better had he torn down the altars on the high places.

All of us, whether we are Ahab or Jehoshaphat, have sin that we can turn from still remaining in our lives. Let us seek to be fully pleasing to the LORD.

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Do you know for sure if you will go to heaven or hell when you die? Are you experiencing in your life the peace and joy of a personal relationship with our Creator and Father? Learn more about salvation through The Message of the Cross.

Solomon’s Dedication Captures Timeless Principles We Should Study

It is worth reading and reflecting prayerfully on the prayer of dedication Solomon delivered for the temple. There is a lot of truth about our relationship YHWH that today people seem to have forgotten in mainstream Christianity. Our relationship with YHWH is not simply that He gives us all we want no matter what we do because of grace. It is a covenant. Both sides have a commitment. If we are His people and walk in His ways, then He will be our God.

Solomon recognizes that there will be sin. He further recognizes that there will be consequences for sin. He focuses then on the importance of repentance and turning away from sin and wholeheartedly back to YHWH as a key step in forgiveness.

These are timeless principles. The main change is that now we know who Messiah is in the person of Yeshua. We can accept forgiveness through His payment for our sins. However, we still need to repent genuinely and fully and come humbly before our God asking forgiveness in Yeshua’s name.

Incidentally, our relationship with our Father serves as a model for our earthly relationships as parents and children. Sin and disobedience has consequences. Full reconciliation requires repentance to a godly standard.  We do not do our children favors by accepting them fully and cheerfully in their rebellion as if there is no issue for them to change. It sets the stage for them to live in rebellion to YHWH throughout their lives.

1 Kings 8: 22-53

The Prayer of Dedication

      22Then Solomon stood before the altar of the LORD in the presence of all the assembly of Israel and spread out his hands toward heaven. 23He said, “O LORD, the God of Israel, there is no God like You in heaven above or on earth beneath, keeping covenant and showing lovingkindness to Your servants who walk before You with all their heart, 24who have kept with Your servant, my father David, that which You have promised him; indeed, You have spoken with Your mouth and have fulfilled it with Your hand as it is this day. 25“Now therefore, O LORD, the God of Israel, keep with Your servant David my father that which You have promised him, saying, ‘You shall not lack a man to sit on the throne of Israel, if only your sons take heed to their way to walk before Me as you have walked.’ 26“Now therefore, O God of Israel, let Your word, I pray, be confirmed which You have spoken to Your servant, my father David.

      27“But will God indeed dwell on the earth? Behold, heaven and the highest heaven cannot contain You, how much less this house which I have built! 28“Yet have regard to the prayer of Your servant and to his supplication, O LORD my God, to listen to the cry and to the prayer which Your servant prays before You today; 29that Your eyes may be open toward this house night and day, toward the place of which You have said, ‘My name shall be there,’ to listen to the prayer which Your servant shall pray toward this place. 30“Listen to the supplication of Your servant and of Your people Israel, when they pray toward this place; hear in heaven Your dwelling place; hear and forgive.

      31“If a man sins against his neighbor and is made to take an oath, and he comes and takes an oath before Your altar in this house, 32then hear in heaven and act and judge Your servants, condemning the wicked by bringing his way on his own head and justifying the righteous by giving him according to his righteousness.

      33“When Your people Israel are defeated before an enemy, because they have sinned against You, if they turn to You again and confess Your name and pray and make supplication to You in this house, 34then hear in heaven, and forgive the sin of Your people Israel, and bring them back to the land which You gave to their fathers.

      35“When the heavens are shut up and there is no rain, because they have sinned against You, and they pray toward this place and confess Your name and turn from their sin when You afflict them, 36then hear in heaven and forgive the sin of Your servants and of Your people Israel, indeed, teach them the good way in which they should walk. And send rain on Your land, which You have given Your people for an inheritance.

      37“If there is famine in the land, if there is pestilence, if there is blight or mildew, locust or grasshopper, if their enemy besieges them in the land of their cities, whatever plague, whatever sickness there is, 38whatever prayer or supplication is made by any man or by all Your people Israel, each knowing the affliction of his own heart, and spreading his hands toward this house; 39then hear in heaven Your dwelling place, and forgive and act and render to each according to all his ways, whose heart You know, for You alone know the hearts of all the sons of men, 40that they may fear You all the days that they live in the land which You have given to our fathers.

      41“Also concerning the foreigner who is not of Your people Israel, when he comes from a far country for Your name’s sake 42(for they will hear of Your great name and Your mighty hand, and of Your outstretched arm); when he comes and prays toward this house, 43hear in heaven Your dwelling place, and do according to all for which the foreigner calls to You, in order that all the peoples of the earth may know Your name, to fear You, as do Your people Israel, and that they may know that this house which I have built is called by Your name.

      44“When Your people go out to battle against their enemy, by whatever way You shall send them, and they pray to the LORD toward the city which You have chosen and the house which I have built for Your name, 45then hear in heaven their prayer and their supplication, and maintain their cause.

      46“When they sin against You (for there is no man who does not sin) and You are angry with them and deliver them to an enemy, so that they take them away captive to the land of the enemy, far off or near; 47if they take thought in the land where they have been taken captive, and repent and make supplication to You in the land of those who have taken them captive, saying, ‘We have sinned and have committed iniquity, we have acted wickedly’; 48if they return to You with all their heart and with all their soul in the land of their enemies who have taken them captive, and pray to You toward their land which You have given to their fathers, the city which You have chosen, and the house which I have built for Your name; 49then hear their prayer and their supplication in heaven Your dwelling place, and maintain their cause, 50and forgive Your people who have sinned against You and all their transgressions which they have transgressed against You, and make them objects of compassion before those who have taken them captive, that they may have compassion on them 51(for they are Your people and Your inheritance which You have brought forth from Egypt, from the midst of the iron furnace), 52that Your eyes may be open to the supplication of Your servant and to the supplication of Your people Israel, to listen to them whenever they call to You. 53“For You have separated them from all the peoples of the earth as Your inheritance, as You spoke through Moses Your servant, when You brought our fathers forth from Egypt, O Lord GOD.”

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Do you know for sure if you will go to heaven or hell when you die? Are you experiencing in your life the peace and joy of a personal relationship with our Creator and Father? Learn more about salvation through The Message of the Cross.

The Heart of David for His Son

David is a very interesting figure to study and since scripture identifies him as a man after God’s own heart, we should take heed. His son rose up against him and would have killed him, and yet David wanted not to kill him and then mourns him. Perhaps this is because David knows some of this is based on punishment for his sin with Bathsheba. Perhaps he just loved or favored his son, Absalom. Perhaps David was living out the example of forgiveness and grace that he experienced from YHWH in his own life and wished for Absalom to have a chance to repent.

None the less, we see David mourn genuinely.

The decision of Joab is a more traditional approach to deal with someone who is trying to take over your kingdom. He slays Absalom, despite David’s instructions to “deal gently” with him. This is an interesting choice to ponder as well given that Joab knowingly went against the desires and instructions of King David… likely to do what he thought best for David and the kingdom.

1 Samuel 18

Absalom Slain

      1Then David numbered the people who were with him and set over them commanders of thousands and commanders of hundreds. 2David sent the people out, one third under the command of Joab, one third under the command of Abishai the son of Zeruiah, Joab’s brother, and one third under the command of Ittai the Gittite. And the king said to the people, “I myself will surely go out with you also.” 3But the people said, “You should not go out; for if we indeed flee, they will not care about us; even if half of us die, they will not care about us. But you are worth ten thousand of us; therefore now it is better that you be ready to help us from the city.” 4Then the king said to them, “Whatever seems best to you I will do.” So the king stood beside the gate, and all the people went out by hundreds and thousands. 5The king charged Joab and Abishai and Ittai, saying, “Deal gently for my sake with the young man Absalom.” And all the people heard when the king charged all the commanders concerning Absalom.

      6Then the people went out into the field against Israel, and the battle took place in the forest of Ephraim. 7The people of Israel were defeated there before the servants of David, and the slaughter there that day was great, 20,000 men. 8For the battle there was spread over the whole countryside, and the forest devoured more people that day than the sword devoured.

      9Now Absalom happened to meet the servants of David. For Absalom was riding on his mule, and the mule went under the thick branches of a great oak. And his head caught fast in the oak, so he was left hanging between heaven and earth, while the mule that was under him kept going. 10When a certain man saw it, he told Joab and said, “Behold, I saw Absalom hanging in an oak.” 11Then Joab said to the man who had told him, “Now behold, you saw him! Why then did you not strike him there to the ground? And I would have given you ten pieces of silver and a belt.” 12The man said to Joab, “Even if I should receive a thousand pieces of silver in my hand, I would not put out my hand against the king’s son; for in our hearing the king charged you and Abishai and Ittai, saying, ‘Protect for me the young man Absalom!’ 13“Otherwise, if I had dealt treacherously against his life (and there is nothing hidden from the king), then you yourself would have stood aloof.” 14Then Joab said, “I will not waste time here with you.” So he took three spears in his hand and thrust them through the heart of Absalom while he was yet alive in the midst of the oak. 15And ten young men who carried Joab’s armor gathered around and struck Absalom and killed him.

      16Then Joab blew the trumpet, and the people returned from pursuing Israel, for Joab restrained the people. 17They took Absalom and cast him into a deep pit in the forest and erected over him a very great heap of stones. And all Israel fled, each to his tent. 18Now Absalom in his lifetime had taken and set up for himself a pillar which is in the King’s Valley, for he said, “I have no son to preserve my name.” So he named the pillar after his own name, and it is called Absalom’s Monument to this day.

David Is Grief-stricken

      19Then Ahimaaz the son of Zadok said, “Please let me run and bring the king news that the LORD has freed him from the hand of his enemies.” 20But Joab said to him, “You are not the man to carry news this day, but you shall carry news another day; however, you shall carry no news today because the king’s son is dead.” 21Then Joab said to the Cushite, “Go, tell the king what you have seen.” So the Cushite bowed to Joab and ran. 22Now Ahimaaz the son of Zadok said once more to Joab, “But whatever happens, please let me also run after the Cushite.” And Joab said, “Why would you run, my son, since you will have no reward for going?” 23“But whatever happens,” he said, “I will run.” So he said to him, “Run.” Then Ahimaaz ran by way of the plain and passed up the Cushite.

      24Now David was sitting between the two gates; and the watchman went up to the roof of the gate by the wall, and raised his eyes and looked, and behold, a man running by himself. 25The watchman called and told the king. And the king said, “If he is by himself there is good news in his mouth.” And he came nearer and nearer. 26Then the watchman saw another man running; and the watchman called to the gatekeeper and said, “Behold, another man running by himself.” And the king said, “This one also is bringing good news.” 27The watchman said, “I think the running of the first one is like the running of Ahimaaz the son of Zadok.” And the king said, “This is a good man and comes with good news.”

      28Ahimaaz called and said to the king, “All is well.” And he prostrated himself before the king with his face to the ground. And he said, “Blessed is the LORD your God, who has delivered up the men who lifted their hands against my lord the king.” 29The king said, “Is it well with the young man Absalom?” And Ahimaaz answered, “When Joab sent the king’s servant, and your servant, I saw a great tumult, but I did not know what it was.30Then the king said, “Turn aside and stand here.” So he turned aside and stood still.

      31Behold, the Cushite arrived, and the Cushite said, “Let my lord the king receive good news, for the LORD has freed you this day from the hand of all those who rose up against you.” 32Then the king said to the Cushite, “Is it well with the young man Absalom?” And the Cushite answered, “Let the enemies of my lord the king, and all who rise up against you for evil, be as that young man!”

      33The king was deeply moved and went up to the chamber over the gate and wept. And thus he said as he walked, “O my son Absalom, my son, my son Absalom! Would I had died instead of you, O Absalom, my son, my son!”

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