Category Archives: Marriage

Evidence in Scripture, Marriage, Parenting

Are Genealogies Important?

I will admit that I am not naturally engaged by reading the genealogy sections in scripture. However, the fact that they are included and in quite a few places should signal to us that they are important. I can think of at least two simple conclusions I can reach. First, family is important. It is part of our heritage. It is the organizational structure that Yahweh chose for how His people would be organized. Second, it reminds me that many books of the Bible are historical accounts. We can take them in that perspective. The books of Kings and Chronicles are among the historical accounts. They are not just stories. They really happened.

I am personally convinced that deeper study of the genealogies can reveal much more to us as well, but let us at least recognize the surface significance and not overlook them. If Yahweh saw fit to include them in the Bible, we should read them and pray for insight about them.

1 Chronicles 1

Genealogy from Adam

      1Adam, Seth, Enosh, 2Kenan, Mahalalel, Jared, 3Enoch, MethuSelah, Lamech, 4Noah, Shem, Ham and Japheth.

      5The sons of Japheth were Gomer, Magog, Madai, Javan, Tubal, Meshech and Tiras. 6The sons of Gomer were Ashkenaz, Diphath, and Togarmah. 7The sons of Javan were Elishah, Tarshish, Kittim and Rodanim.

      8The sons of Ham were Cush, Mizraim, Put, and Canaan. 9The sons of Cush were Seba, Havilah, Sabta, Raama and Sabteca; and the sons of Raamah were Sheba and Dedan. 10Cush became the father of Nimrod; he began to be a mighty one in the earth.

      11Mizraim became the father of the people of Lud, Anam, Lehab, Naphtuh, 12Pathrus, Casluh, from which the Philistines came, and Caphtor.

      13Canaan became the father of Sidon, his firstborn, Heth, 14and the Jebusites, the Amorites, the Girgashites, 15the Hivites, the Arkites, the Sinites, 16the Arvadites, the Zemarites and the Hamathites.

      17The sons of Shem were Elam, Asshur, Arpachshad, Lud, Aram, Uz, Hul, Gether and Meshech. 18Arpachshad became the father of Shelah and Shelah became the father of Eber. 19Two sons were born to Eber, the name of the one was Peleg, for in his days the earth was divided, and his brother’s name was Joktan. 20Joktan became the father of Almodad, Sheleph, Hazarmaveth, Jerah, 21Hadoram, Uzal, Diklah, 22Ebal, Abimael, Sheba, 23Ophir, Havilah and Jobab; all these were the sons of Joktan.

      24Shem, Arpachshad, Shelah, 25Eber, Peleg, Reu, 26Serug, Nahor, Terah, 27Abram, that is Abraham.

Descendants of Abraham

      28The sons of Abraham were Isaac and Ishmael. 29These are their genealogies: the firstborn of Ishmael was Nebaioth, then Kedar, Adbeel, Mibsam, 30Mishma, Dumah, Massa, Hadad, Tema, 31Jetur, Naphish and Kedemah; these were the sons of Ishmael. 32The sons of Keturah, Abraham’s concubine, whom she bore, were Zimran, Jokshan, Medan, Midian, Ishbak and Shuah. And the sons of Jokshan were Sheba and Dedan. 33The sons of Midian were Ephah, Epher, Hanoch, Abida and Eldaah. All these were the sons of Keturah.

      34Abraham became the father of Isaac. The sons of Isaac were Esau and Israel. 35The sons of Esau were Eliphaz, Reuel, Jeush, Jalam and Korah. 36The sons of Eliphaz were Teman, Omar, Zephi, Gatam, Kenaz, Timna and Amalek. 37The sons of Reuel were Nahath, Zerah, Shammah and Mizzah. 38The sons of Seir were Lotan, Shobal, Zibeon, Anah, Dishon, Ezer and Dishan. 39The sons of Lotan were Hori and Homam; and Lotan’s sister was Timna. 40The sons of Shobal were Alian, Manahath, Ebal, Shephi and Onam. And the sons of Zibeon were Aiah and Anah. 41The son of Anah was Dishon. And the sons of Dishon were Hamran, Eshban, Ithran and Cheran. 42The sons of Ezer were Bilhan, Zaavan and Jaakan. The sons of Dishan were Uz and Aran.

      43Now these are the kings who reigned in the land of Edom before any king of the sons of Israel reigned. Bela was the son of Beor, and the name of his city was Dinhabah. 44When Bela died, Jobab the son of Zerah of Bozrah became king in his place. 45When Jobab died, Husham of the land of the Temanites became king in his place. 46When Husham died, Hadad the son of Bedad, who defeated Midian in the field of Moab, became king in his place; and the name of his city was Avith. 47When Hadad died, Samlah of Masrekah became king in his place. 48When Samlah died, Shaul of Rehoboth by the River became king in his place. 49When Shaul died, Baal-hanan the son of Achbor became king in his place. 50When Baal-hanan died, Hadad became king in his place; and the name of his city was Pai, and his wife’s name was Mehetabel, the daughter of Matred, the daughter of Mezahab. 51Then Hadad died.
Now the chiefs of Edom were: chief Timna, chief Aliah, chief Jetheth, 52chief Oholibamah, chief Elah, chief Pinon, 53chief Kenaz, chief Teman, chief Mibzar, 54chief Magdiel, chief Iram. These were the chiefs of Edom.

I invite you to pray with me:

Father, please let Your Spirit lead and guide me in understanding all aspects of Your word. Help me to embrace the reality that the Bible is filled with historical accounts of what really happened. It is a non fiction work of literature. Let there be healing and transformation in our family structure today. There are so many broken families due to sin and separation from You. Please restore the importance and focus on biblical marriage and parenting and biblical focus on honoring parents even after we are adults ourselves. Amen. 

Shalom

Devotion by John in service to Christ

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Do you know for sure if you will go to heaven or hell when you die? Are you experiencing in your life the peace and joy of a personal relationship with our Creator and Father? Learn more about salvation through The Message of the Cross.

Heaven and Hell, His Ways Are Not Our Ways, Is the Old Testament Relevant Today?, Marriage, Study the Word, Teachable

Let God’s Word Guide My Understanding and Not My Understanding Limit God’s Word

There is no contradiction between the Torah and the writings of the prophet (Old Testament) and the gospels and letters (New Testament). Yeshua never fell into a trap He could not explain. He often emphasized the Old Testament in His teaching.

Sometimes we have to be willing to change our pre-conceived understanding or bias that we may have when we confront an apparent contradiction. We have to admit we don’t always already have the full understanding and allow ourselves to change or adapt how we think of something. If we do so, we will understand more and draw nearer to God.

Said another way, do we redefine God’s word based on our current understanding? or do we redefine our current understanding based on studying what the Bible actually says, even if it contradicts tradition and common church teaching? Naturally, testing what we understand from scripture is important. The best place to test it is against scripture itself. Remember, that is the source of truth.

In some ways it is a bit like a puzzle.  You take on faith when you open a new box that all the pieces are there and fit together. Knowing that, you work and search to fit them all together.  You do not simply give up the first time you can’t find the right piece and assume the puzzle is defective. You keep looking. In reading the Bible, we start with the understanding that the pieces fit together and then search out how to put them all in place.

Matthew 22:23-33

Jesus Answers the Sadducees

      23On that day some Sadducees (who say there is no resurrection) came to Jesus and questioned Him, 24asking, “Teacher, Moses said, ‘IF A MAN DIES HAVING NO CHILDREN, HIS BROTHER AS NEXT OF KIN SHALL MARRY HIS WIFE, AND RAISE UP CHILDREN FOR HIS BROTHER.’ 25“Now there were seven brothers with us; and the first married and died, and having no children left his wife to his brother; 26so also the second, and the third, down to the seventh. 27“Last of all, the woman died. 28“In the resurrection, therefore, whose wife of the seven will she be? For they all had married her.”

      29But Jesus answered and said to them, “You are mistaken, not understanding the Scriptures nor the power of God. 30“For in the resurrection they neither marry nor are given in marriage, but are like angels in heaven. 31“But regarding the resurrection of the dead, have you not read what was spoken to you by God: 32‘I AM THE GOD OF ABRAHAM, AND THE GOD OF ISAAC, AND THE GOD OF JACOB’? He is not the God of the dead but of the living.” 33When the crowds heard this, they were astonished at His teaching.

We should keep in mind that in answering the question, Yeshua reflects on the Scriptures. This would have been the Old Testament. The New Testament was not written yet. Yeshua constantly points to that as authoritative truth.

With regards to marriage, we see in the resurrection people do not marry. People react to this in a variety of different ways. Perhaps some are grateful because they have had very complex family relationships, somewhat like the one listed in scripture. Many may feel disappointed as they want to be with their spouse in the same way. This is all we know how to get our mind around. The point is that we do not let the constraints on our understanding define what the word says. Instead, take it in, even if you don’t fully understand it and accept it. Let the scripture change your understanding of what the resurrection will be like, even if it makes you uncomfortable or disappointed at first. Trust in the LORD. Has he not said, there will be no sadness in the resurrection?

Revelation 21:3-4

3And I heard a loud voice from the throne, saying, “Behold, the tabernacle of God is among men, and He will dwell among them, and they shall be His people, and God Himself will be among them, 4and He will wipe away every tear from their eyes; and there will no longer be any death; there will no longer be any mourning, or crying, or pain; the first things have passed away.”

Another point to clarify here is that the scripture says we will be like angels in that we do not marry in the resurrection. This is not to say that we will be angels. Angels and people are distinct creations. One does not transition between them. You are either an angel or a person and that never changes. Many mistake this to say that we become angels in heaven, but that is not what it says.

Don’t miss in reading this that Jesus also confirms resurrection is real and those who were in right relationship with God when they died have already been resurrected and are with Him in Heaven. While this may not yet be our physical bodies, which will be resurrected after Yeshua returns, we are none the less alive spiritually and in the presence of the LORD.

In conclusion, Yeshua is chastising the Sadducees for misreading the scriptures and adding their own assumptions to them, and then declaring that it did not make sense. Yeshua is, in a sense, saying they should have realized that if they got to a point that did not make sense to them, they should have checked their assumptions and gone back the the scriptures to see what they really say and what was added by the Sadducees, even if they did not do so intentionally. We should do likewise.

I invite you to pray with me:

Father, please help me to clearly understand Your word. Holy Spirit, please guide me and instruct me. Help me to have wisdom and courage to challenge what I believe as I study and learn new insights and truth. Let the Bible transform my beliefs instead of my beliefs dictating how I read or understand the Bible. Thank You! Amen. 

For some additional study, I have included a portion of the Barnes Commentary on BibleHub.com.

Matthew 22:29
Jesus answered and said unto them, Ye do err, not knowing the scriptures, nor the power of God.

Ye do err, not knowing … – They had taken a wrong view of the doctrine of the resurrection.

It was not taught that people would marry there. The “Scriptures,” here, mean the books of the Old Testament. By appealing to them, Jesus showed that the doctrine of the future state was there, and that the Sadducees should have believed it as it was, and not have added the absurd doctrine to it that people must live there as they do here. The way in which the enemies of the truth often attempt to make a doctrine of the Bible ridiculous is by adding to it, and then calling it absurd. The reason why the Saviour produced a passage from the books of Moses Matthew 22:32 was that they had also appealed to his writings, Matthew 22:24. Other places of the Old Testament, in fact, asserted the doctrine more clearly Daniel 12:2; Isaiah 26:19, but he wished to meet them on their own ground. None of those scriptures asserted that people would live there as they do here, and therefore their reasoning was false.

Nor the power of God – They probably denied, as many have done since, that God could gather the scattered dust of the dead and remould it into a body. On this ground they affirmed that the doctrine could not be true – opposing reason to revelation, and supposing that infinite power could not reorganize a body that it had at first organized, and raise a body from its own dust which it had at first raised from nothing.

Matthew 22:30
For in the resurrection they neither marry, nor are given in marriage, but are as the angels of God in heaven.

Neither marry … – This was a full answer to the objections of the Sadducees.

But are as the angels of God – That is, in the manner of their conversation; in regard to marriage and the mode of their existence.

Luke adds that they shall be “equal with the angels.” That is, they shall be elevated above the circumstances of mortality, and live in a manner and in a kind of conversation similar to that of the angels. It does not imply that they shall be equal in intellect, but only “in the circumstances of their existence,” as that is distinguished from the way in which mortals live. He also adds, “Neither do they die any more, but are the children of God; being the children of the resurrection,” or being accounted worthy to be raised up to life, and therefore “sons of God raised up to him.”

Matthew 22:31
But as touching the resurrection of the dead, have ye not read that which was spoken unto you by God, saying,

As touching … – That is, in proof that the dead are raised.

The passage which he quotes is recorded in Exodus 3:6, Exodus 3:15, This was at the burning bush (Mark and Luke). Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob had been dead for a long time when Moses spoke this – Abraham for 329 years, Isaac for 224 years, and Jacob for 198 years – yet God spake then as being still “their God.” They must, therefore, be still somewhere living, for God is not the God of the dead; that is, it is absurd to say that God rules over those who are “extinct or annihilated,” but he is the God only of those who have an existence. Luke adds, “all live unto him.” That is, all the righteous dead, all of whom he can be properly called their God, live unto his glory. This passage does not prove directly that the dead “body” would be raised, but only by consequence. It proves that Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob had an existence then, or that their souls were alive. This the Sadducees denied Acts 23:8, and this was the main point in dispute. If this was admitted – if there was a state of rewards and punishments – then it would easily follow that the bodies of the dead would be raised.

 Shalom

Devotion by John in service to Christ

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Do you know for sure if you will go to heaven or hell when you die? Are you experiencing in your life the peace and joy of a personal relationship with our Creator and Father? Learn more about salvation through The Message of the Cross.

Marriage, Purposeful / Intentional, Self Control, Wise

Keep a Watchful Eye for Sin, Even While Things Are Going Well

Keep a watchful eye for sin as it may come creeping into your life. Sometimes we are more aware to look when we feel there is trouble or difficulty, as if it is a warning sign that we are in sin and being disciplined. However, sometimes we can have sin start creeping into our lives while things are going well and while we are actually in other ways walking in the path the LORD has for us.

David was very righteous in some ways, patiently waiting on the LORD, not killing Saul when he could have. Trusting and seeking the LORD for key decisions. However, even as his power grew and he moved closer to becoming king of all Israel, he was continuing to acquire more and more wives. It appears from today’s passage that he had at least six. This is not the way YHWH intends for marriage to be. He intends it to be one man and one woman.

I have previously posted about how marrying multiple wives seemed to be socially acceptable to some of our faith fathers. It leads to trouble in all cases.  It caused trouble for Abraham and his household and also for Jacob. There is jealousy and the ability to be a good husband and father is weakened. David has significant problems internal to his family as we will read later on, including one son who displaces him briefly from the kingship. We also see how David’s wandering eye ends up leading him into sin with Bathsheeba and then Uriah.  Solomon ultimately drifts into paganism because of his multiple pagan wives.

The point of this post, however, is to highlight that we should take care even when things are going well to avoid letting sin and Satan get a foothold in our lives where he can lead us toward sin in the future.

2 Samuel 3:1-5

The House of David Strengthened

      1Now there was a long war between the house of Saul and the house of David; and David grew steadily stronger, but the house of Saul grew weaker continually.

      2Sons were born to David at Hebron: his firstborn was Amnon, by Ahinoam the Jezreelitess; 3and his second, Chileab, by Abigail the widow of Nabal the Carmelite; and the third, Absalom the son of Maacah, the daughter of Talmai, king of Geshur; 4and the fourth, Adonijah the son of Haggith; and the fifth, Shephatiah the son of Abital; 5and the sixth, Ithream, by David’s wife Eglah. These were born to David at Hebron.

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Do you know for sure if you will go to heaven or hell when you die? Are you experiencing in your life the peace and joy of a personal relationship with our Creator and Father? Learn more about salvation through The Message of the Cross.

Discerning / Judging, Marriage, Rebuke Wrong Behavior, Seeking God, Study the Word, Teachable

Challenge the Cultural Norms Even Within Christianity Today

I firmly believe that YHWH intends one man and one woman in marriage. I believe scripture makes this clear. However, we see many examples where His people appear to be influenced by the pagan nations around them in areas such as marriage to more than one wife. It becomes “normal” or “accepted” and then at some point His people don’t even recognize it is wrong. David is faithful and dependent on YHWH at this point in his life and yet he does not seem to recognize that this is wrong.

1 Samuel 25:39-44

David Marries Abigail

39When David heard that Nabal was dead, he said, “Blessed be the LORD, who has pleaded the cause of my reproach from the hand of Nabal and has kept back His servant from evil. The LORD has also returned the evildoing of Nabal on his own head.” Then David sent a proposal to Abigail, to take her as his wife. 40When the servants of David came to Abigail at Carmel, they spoke to her, saying, “David has sent us to you to take you as his wife.” 41She arose and bowed with her face to the ground and said, “Behold, your maidservant is a maid to wash the feet of my lord’s servants.” 42Then Abigail quickly arose, and rode on a donkey, with her five maidens who attended her; and she followed the messengers of David and became his wife.

      43David had also taken Ahinoam of Jezreel, and they both became his wives.

      44Now Saul had given Michal his daughter, David’s wife, to Palti the son of Laish, who was from Gallim.

I have included a few verses which clearly state one wife to one husband. Notice the plural vs. singular nature of the combinations of husband and wife or husbands and wives. There is no “husband love your wives” or “hold fast to your wives“. Singular matches each time and when plural is used, it refers to more than one married couple.

Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh. (Genesis 2:24 ESV)

But because of the temptation to sexual immorality, each man should have his own wife and each woman her own husband. (1 Corinthians 7:2 ESV)

Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church, his body, and is himself its Savior. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit in everything to their husbands. Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, … (Ephesians 5:22-33 ESV)

He answered, “Have you not read that he who created them from the beginning made them male and female, and said, ‘Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh’? So they are no longer two but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let not man separate.” (Matthew 19:4-6 ESV)

I think we also need to be aware that some things we have taken to be normal and acceptable living among the worldly are actually not ok. Even though people identifying as Christians may make certain actions commonplace now, we can not assume that makes it right. We must go back and study the word of YHWH and pray for enlightenment and discernment. We must challenge cultural norms, even those that our parents accepted and their parents before them. I am not speaking only of marriage, but of any cultural norms… could be holidays like Halloween or even how we celebrate Easter, could be acceptance of homosexuality or abortion. There are a wide range of issues around which those identifying as Christian have strayed far from God’s word as they have been influenced by the culture of the world around them.

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Do you know for sure if you will go to heaven or hell when you die? Are you experiencing in your life the peace and joy of a personal relationship with our Creator and Father? Learn more about salvation through The Message of the Cross.

Faith / Trusting God, His Timing Not Ours, His Ways Are Not Our Ways, Loving / Kind, Marriage, Provider, Seeking God, Thankfulness

The Intriguing Beginning of a Great Prophet

1 Samuel 1 records events in a family life, some which we can easily relate to and some which seem very hard to get our minds around given how different our culture and time is to that recorded in the scriptures. We see once again how badly it goes for a man to have more than one wife. There is rivalry and it is not fruitful, but rather hurtful. We see favoritism from the husband, which is also not helpful.
Perhaps what is interesting is that we know the LORD closed Hannah’s womb, but we don’t know why. We can speculate that perhaps it was his intent all the while to prepare Hannah to give her son to him, but that is speculation. The scripture does not tell us. Most of us probably think that was harsh or “unfair”. We must trust our LORD and Father, even when things go the way we don’t understand.
Hannah offers a son to the LORD and he then opens her womb. She is honorable and true to her vow to the LORD. Most of us probably have a hard time with her “giving her child away”. However, the LORD used Samuel as a great prophet, honoring her dedicating her son to him.
Let us learn to trust our Father and come to him with our supplications and with thanksgiving. Let us be careful in making vows to him, but when we do, let us fulfill them.
Elkanah and His Wives
      1Now there was a certain man from Ramathaim-zophim from the hill country of Ephraim, and his name was Elkanah the son of Jeroham, the son of Elihu, the son of Tohu, the son of Zuph, an Ephraimite. 2He had two wives: the name of one was Hannah and the name of the other Peninnah; and Peninnah had children, but Hannah had no children.

      3Now this man would go up from his city yearly to worship and to sacrifice to the LORD of hosts in Shiloh. And the two sons of Eli, Hophni and Phinehas, were priests to the LORD there. 4When the day came that Elkanah sacrificed, he would give portions to Peninnah his wife and to all her sons and her daughters; 5but to Hannah he would give a double portion, for he loved Hannah, but the LORD had closed her womb. 6Her rival, however, would provoke her bitterly to irritate her, because the LORD had closed her womb. 7It happened year after year, as often as she went up to the house of the LORD, she would provoke her; so she wept and would not eat. 8Then Elkanah her husband said to her, “Hannah, why do you weep and why do you not eat and why is your heart sad? Am I not better to you than ten sons?”

      9Then Hannah rose after eating and drinking in Shiloh. Now Eli the priest was sitting on the seat by the doorpost of the temple of the LORD. 10She, greatly distressed, prayed to the LORD and wept bitterly. 11She made a vow and said, “O LORD of hosts, if You will indeed look on the affliction of Your maidservant and remember me, and not forget Your maidservant, but will give Your maidservant a son, then I will give him to the LORD all the days of his life, and a razor shall never come on his head.”

      12Now it came about, as she continued praying before the LORD, that Eli was watching her mouth. 13As for Hannah, she was speaking in her heart, only her lips were moving, but her voice was not heard. So Eli thought she was drunk. 14Then Eli said to her, “How long will you make yourself drunk? Put away your wine from you.” 15But Hannah replied, “No, my lord, I am a woman oppressed in spirit; I have drunk neither wine nor strong drink, but I have poured out my soul before the LORD. 16“Do not consider your maidservant as a worthless woman, for I have spoken until now out of my great concern and provocation.” 17Then Eli answered and said, “Go in peace; and may the God of Israel grant your petition that you have asked of Him.” 18She said, “Let your maidservant find favor in your sight.” So the woman went her way and ate, and her face was no longer sad.

Samuel Is Born to Hannah

      19Then they arose early in the morning and worshiped before the LORD, and returned again to their house in Ramah. And Elkanah had relations with Hannah his wife, and the LORD remembered her. 20It came about in due time, after Hannah had conceived, that she gave birth to a son; and she named him Samuel, saying, “Because I have asked him of the LORD.”

      21Then the man Elkanah went up with all his household to offer to the LORD the yearly sacrifice and pay his vow. 22But Hannah did not go up, for she said to her husband, “I will not go up until the child is weaned; then I will bring him, that he may appear before the LORD and stay there forever.” 23Elkanah her husband said to her, “Do what seems best to you. Remain until you have weaned him; only may the LORD confirm His word.” So the woman remained and nursed her son until she weaned him. 24Now when she had weaned him, she took him up with her, with a three-year-old bull and one ephah of flour and a jug of wine, and brought him to the house of the LORD in Shiloh, although the child was young. 25Then they slaughtered the bull, and brought the boy to Eli. 26She said, “Oh, my lord! As your soul lives, my lord, I am the woman who stood here beside you, praying to the LORD. 27“For this boy I prayed, and the LORD has given me my petition which I asked of Him. 28“So I have also dedicated him to the LORD; as long as he lives he is dedicated to the LORD.” And he worshiped the LORD there.

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Do you know for sure if you will go to heaven or hell when you die? Are you experiencing in your life the peace and joy of a personal relationship with our Creator and Father? Learn more about salvation through The Message of the Cross.

Am I on the path?, Children, Church / Body of Christ, Drunkenness, Faith / Trusting God, Love, Marriage, Parenting, Purposeful / Intentional, Tongue / Gossip / Slander

How Are We To Behave?

The entire Bible is a guide for us to help us lead our lives in proper relationship with our heavenly Father. In his letter to Titus, Paul takes time to instruct on the way in which older and younger men and women should behave. This is not a comprehensive list of everything we should do, but it is a good checklist at least on some of our attitudes and behaviors toward YHWH and toward one another.

Titus 2

Duties of the Older and Younger

     1But as for you, speak the things which are fitting for sound doctrine. 2Older men are to be temperate, dignified, sensible, sound in faith, in love, in perseverance.

      3Older women likewise are to be reverent in their behavior, not malicious gossips nor enslaved to much wine, teaching what is good, 4so that they may encourage the young women to love their husbands, to love their children, 5to be sensible, pure, workers at home, kind, being subject to their own husbands, so that the word of God will not be dishonored.

      6Likewise urge the young men to be sensible; 7in all things show yourself to be an example of good deeds, with purity in doctrine, dignified, 8sound in speech which is beyond reproach, so that the opponent will be put to shame, having nothing bad to say about us.

      9Urge bondslaves to be subject to their own masters in everything, to be well-pleasing, not argumentative, 10not pilfering, but showing all good faith so that they will adorn the doctrine of God our Savior in every respect.

      11For the grace of God has appeared, bringing salvation to all men, 12instructing us to deny ungodliness and worldly desires and to live sensibly, righteously and godly in the present age, 13looking for the blessed hope and the appearing of the glory of our great God and Savior, Christ Jesus, 14who gave Himself for us to redeem us from every lawless deed, and to purify for Himself a people for His own possession, zealous for good deeds.

      15These things speak and exhort and reprove with all authority. Let no one disregard you.

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Do you know for sure if you will go to heaven or hell when you die? Are you experiencing in your life the peace and joy of a personal relationship with our Creator and Father? Learn more about salvation through The Message of the Cross.

Divorce, Guide, Hebrew Roots / Commands / Law, Loving / Kind, Marriage

What God Has Joined, Let No Man Separate

2 Comments

YHWH does not want divorce. Further, when divorce happens, He does not want divorce to be frivolous. He put forth laws to protect people for when the sinful practice of divorce takes place because of the hardness of the people’s hearts. But he also sets up guidance to protect people and to help marriage be successful.

Matthew 19:3-9

  3Some Pharisees came to Jesus, testing Him and asking, “Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife for any reason at all?” 4And He answered and said, “Have you not read that He who created them from the beginning MADE THEM MALE AND FEMALE, 5and said, ‘FOR THIS REASON A MAN SHALL LEAVE HIS FATHER AND MOTHER AND BE JOINED TO HIS WIFE, AND THE TWO SHALL BECOME ONE FLESH’? 6“So they are no longer two, but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let no man separate.” 7They said to Him, “Why then did Moses command to GIVE HER A CERTIFICATE OF DIVORCE AND SEND her AWAY?” 8He said to them, “Because of your hardness of heart Moses permitted you to divorce your wives; but from the beginning it has not been this way. 9“And I say to you, whoever divorces his wife, except for immorality, and marries another woman commits adultery.”

It is interesting that Yeshua calls out “except for immorality”. That should tell us something about how He feels about immorality, which is referring to sexual relations with other than spouse in this case.

YHWH set forth laws to help guide people to right behavior. Marriage should only be entered into with great seriousness and prayer. The law at first is often misunderstood as a means for a man to divorce his wife. This is not the case. Rather the opposite, this is to protect the women. The law requires that there is cause, not just “I don’t like her”. It calls for identifying “indecency” in her. It requires a formal process with witnesses and documentation through a certificate of divorce so it can not be done verbally in haste or anger. There are permanent consequences. You can not remarry once you cast her off once.  Overall, by allowing divorce, it also allows a way out for the woman who may otherwise be trapped under the potential oppression of a man who may be hard on her because he does not love her.

Deuteronomy 24:1-5

Law of Divorce

    1“When a man takes a wife and marries her, and it happens that she finds no favor in his eyes because he has found some indecency in her, and he writes her a certificate of divorce and puts it in her hand and sends her out from his house, 2and she leaves his house and goes and becomes another man’s wife, 3and if the latter husband turns against her and writes her a certificate of divorce and puts it in her hand and sends her out of his house, or if the latter husband dies who took her to be his wife, 4then her former husband who sent her away is not allowed to take her again to be his wife, since she has been defiled; for that is an abomination before the LORD, and you shall not bring sin on the land which the LORD your God gives you as an inheritance.

      5“When a man takes a new wife, he shall not go out with the army nor be charged with any duty; he shall be free at home one year and shall give happiness to his wife whom he has taken.

I really appreciate verse 5, which we should be careful not to overlook. It really is simple and wise guidance. Often today, many put themselves in a position to disregard this by their own choosing. YHWH knows that newlyweds need time to bond and grow together in their relationship. They should take care not to put themselves in positions where they are separated for long periods of time early in their marriage in particular.  Some do this for military, some for other jobs, some for schooling… but it is not a good idea. Others may not separate by distance, but they separate by busyness. They each get so busy in their own lives, each working different jobs perhaps, that they don’ t invest time together to build their relationship. It is very important to establish a good foundation in marriage and then continue investing in it over time.

Let us enter into marriage with great thought and prayer. For those of us who follow Yeshua, let us remember His instruction… divorce was never intended in God’s plan, but rather was allowed due to the hardness of our own hearts. It is better to not divorce in almost all circumstances.

Matthew 19:4-6

4And He answered and said, “Have you not read that He who created them from the beginning MADE THEM MALE AND FEMALE, 5and said, ‘FOR THIS REASON A MAN SHALL LEAVE HIS FATHER AND MOTHER AND BE JOINED TO HIS WIFE, AND THE TWO SHALL BECOME ONE FLESH’? 6“So they are no longer two, but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let no man separate.”

For more perspective on marriage and some resources to help you invest in your marriage, even if it is going well right now, check out our page on Building Your Marriage.

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Do you know for sure if you will go to heaven or hell when you die? Are you experiencing in your life the peace and joy of a personal relationship with our Creator and Father? Learn more about salvation through The Message of the Cross.

Children, Guide, Marriage, Parenting

God’s Instruction On Family Relations Is Actually Clear

Our culture is so far off from YHWH’s design that even people who claim to follow Christ, often want to pick and choose which scripture “they agree with” and which they don’t. This is not the way. Seeking to understand scripture through study and prayer when it may not make sense to us…that is good. Recognize, though, that in these circumstances it may be you and I that need to change and not the instruction of YHWH.

As an example, many women really struggle at the concept of “wives be subject to your husbands” and want to find a way around submitting to the leadership of their husband, but then want the husband to “love your wife” and children to “be obedient to your parents”. Perhaps some men want to have wives submit, but not really love their wives the way YHWH calls them to.

Colossians 3:18-25

Family Relations

       18Wives, be subject to your husbands, as is fitting in the Lord. 19Husbands, love your wives and do not be embittered against them. 20Children, be obedient to your parents in all things, for this is well-pleasing to the Lord. 21Fathers, do not exasperate your children, so that they will not lose heart.

      22Slaves, in all things obey those who are your masters on earth, not with external service, as those who merely please men, but with sincerity of heart, fearing the Lord. 23Whatever you do, do your work heartily, as for the Lord rather than for men, 24knowing that from the Lord you will receive the reward of the inheritance. It is the Lord Christ whom you serve. 25For he who does wrong will receive the consequences of the wrong which he has done, and that without partiality.

The point is simply that we should accept all of scripture. YHWH’s design for family is wonderful. Keep in mind that the framework around this family model includes the beginning of chapter 3 as well, in which we are to each become new in Christ. This foundational to making the family model work as YHWH intends. We become more like Him and less selfish.

Do not seek to redefine YHWH’s word by trying to find “loopholes” for how we are to behave. Instead seek to transform yourself in Christ and study the word to understand it more clearly. Submit to Christ and obey His instruction, even if you don’t agree. Pray and seek discernment to increase in understanding of the scriptures.

The path to change your life to be more like YHWH desires is not always easy, but obedience is good and a primary way we truly show love for Him. (There are many scriptures where YHWH equates loving Him to obeying His commands. You can search for them if you like with a search engine.)

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Do you know for sure if you will go to heaven or hell when you die? Are you experiencing in your life the peace and joy of a personal relationship with our Creator and Father? Learn more about salvation through The Message of the Cross.

Father / Yahweh, Guide, Hearing from God, Hebrew Roots / Commands / Law, His Ways Are Not Our Ways, Holy, Holy / Set Apart, Idols / False Gods, Marriage, Obeying God, Protector / Deliverer, Righteous, Through Prophets, Worldliness

Tolerance of Sin Is Not A Virtue

YHWH does not consider tolerance of worship of false gods to be a virtue. This may come as quite a hard message for many who are desensitized by worldly influences which constantly preach tolerance of all types of sin as if it is a virtue.

Deuteronomy 7:1-6

     1“When the LORD your God brings you into the land where you are entering to possess it, and clears away many nations before you, the Hittites and the Girgashites and the Amorites and the Canaanites and the Perizzites and the Hivites and the Jebusites, seven nations greater and stronger than you, 2and when the LORD your God delivers them before you and you defeat them, then you shall utterly destroy them. You shall make no covenant with them and show no favor to them. 3“Furthermore, you shall not intermarry with them; you shall not give your daughters to their sons, nor shall you take their daughters for your sons. 4“For they will turn your sons away from following Me to serve other gods; then the anger of the LORD will be kindled against you and He will quickly destroy you. 5“But thus you shall do to them: you shall tear down their altars, and smash their sacred pillars, and hew down their Asherim, and burn their graven images with fire. 6“For you are a holy people to the LORD your God; the LORD your God has chosen you to be a people for His own possession out of all the peoples who are on the face of the earth.

YHWH inherently recognizes and warns His people not to intermarry and not to accept their false gods and worship practices. He instructs His people to tear down even their altars and pillars and idols.

Why?

Because these things are dedicated to sinful worship of false gods. Their continued existence, certainly with intermarriage, will draw some of YHWH’s people away from Him into false worship of worthless things. It separates YHWH from His people.

The same is still true today. Tolerating sin generally, and tolerating the worship of false religions or gods specifically, is not a virtue, but rather a trap. It separates YHWH from His people and leads to destruction for those individuals. We do not help them by tolerating and accepting their false beliefs and idols. We certainly don’t help those that are to come later by leaving all the pagan temples and idols around for them to consider in the future.

YHWH instructed His people rather directly and boldly to be set apart from these things and maintain a very important separation from those things which would in turn separate YHWH from His people. He did so for their benefit, not His. We should apply this principle still today with vigilance.

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Do you know for sure if you will go to heaven or hell when you die? Are you experiencing in your life the peace and joy of a personal relationship with our Creator and Father? Learn more about salvation through The Message of the Cross.
Adultery / Sex Outside Marriage, Children, Envy / Jealousy / Coveting, Family, Forgive Others / Seek Forgiveness, Grace / Forgiveness, Love, Lying / Deceiving, Marriage, Murder, Obeying God, Parenting, Repenting from Sin, Righteousness / Serving God, Sin, Stealing / Theft

You Shall Love Your Neighbor As Yourself

For those of you who read our article yesterday, the introduction to this companion article will be redundant, but we pivot to focus on the last 6 commandments in this article where we focused on the first 4 yesterday. (You Shall Love The Lord Your God With All Your Heart)

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The ten commandments do not represent the sum total of God’s law or instruction for His people. However. He saw fit to focus on these 10 as He addressed the people. Much more detail was shared with the people through Moses and is available for us to study and learn in scripture. The point is, that learning and obeying these 10 commandments is not sufficient but it is a good place to start.

Some immediately want to say that this is out of date, “Didn’t Jesus say to love God and love others was all we need to do?”

Matthew 22:34-40

     34But when the Pharisees heard that Jesus had silenced the Sadducees, they gathered themselves together. 35One of them, a lawyer, asked Him a question, testing Him, 36“Teacher, which is the great commandment in the Law?” 37And He said to him, “ ‘YOU SHALL LOVE THE LORD YOUR GOD WITH ALL YOUR HEART, AND WITH ALL YOUR SOUL, AND WITH ALL YOUR MIND.’ 38“This is the great and foremost commandment. 39“The second is like it, ‘YOU SHALL LOVE YOUR NEIGHBOR AS YOURSELF.’ 40“On these two commandments depend the whole Law and the Prophets.”

Context is important. This is not a new commandment replacing the others. Jesus lived obeying the law of Moses and quoting from it in His teaching. He explicitly said He did not come to change the law.

Matthew 5:17-19

      17“Do not think that I came to abolish the Law or the Prophets; I did not come to abolish but to fulfill. 18“For truly I say to you, until heaven and earth pass away, not the smallest letter or stroke shall pass from the Law until all is accomplished. 19“Whoever then annuls one of the least of these commandments, and teaches others to do the same, shall be called least in the kingdom of heaven; but whoever keeps and teaches them, he shall be called great in the kingdom of heaven.

What Jesus is essentially saying is that He can summarize God’s instruction down to loving God and loving one another. However, we don’t get to define what that means on our terms. All too often people today define that as accepting sin and encouraging people that they do not have to repent of sin to be in right relationship with God. God already defined what it means to love God and love one another. As a starting point, we can use the 10 commandments. The first four are about our relationship with God and the next 6 are about our relationship with each other. This is not an all inclusive list, but it is a good place to start and to a health check on our relationship with God and others. We focus today on our relationship with others.

Deuteronomy 5:16-21 (the last six commandments)

    16‘Honor your father and your mother, as the LORD your God has commanded you, that your days may be prolonged and that it may go well with you on the land which the LORD your God gives you.

      17‘You shall not murder.

      18‘You shall not commit adultery.

      19‘You shall not steal.

      20‘You shall not bear false witness against your neighbor.

      21‘You shall not covet your neighbor’s wife, and you shall not desire your neighbor’s house, his field or his male servant or his female servant, his ox or his donkey or anything that belongs to your neighbor.’

Let us first observe that loving God comes first, before loving others. This is true in the order in which the commandments were given by God and also the order in which Jesus spoke about them… love God and love one another… the order is important.

Honor your father and your mother. God has commanded us to honor our parents. In particular this is important for children when they are in the care of their parents before they grow in wisdom and relationship with the Lord. Their parents are there to protect and provide for and guide them. Even as adults we should honor father and mother. Children do not need to agree with parents in order to honor them.

You shall not murder. Too often this is mistranslated as “do not kill”. There is a difference between killing (e.g. in self defense) and murder. God’s people were often called to defend their nation in battle or to take the promised land at God’s command. God Himself provided a legal system in which some offenses are punishable by death. These are not the same as murder even though people die. On the other hand, abortion is the taking of an innocent life… it is murder. This will be tough for many to accept and internalize. However, keep in mind that Christ has died for our sins and so we can be forgiven.

You shall not commit adultery. Sadly, this should be obvious to anyone who loves their spouse, but our culture seems to be less and less concerned with calling out this sin. It is almost accepted as not ideal or flattering, but commonplace. It really should be considered a terrible offense and not lessened in significance just because so many fail in this area. It rips apart marriage, which is intended as a very close, personal bond between a man and a woman for life. It rips apart and damages families and children. It is very destructive on our society and culture.

You shall not steal. We do not love others by taking what is theirs. That is extremely selfish and hurtful.

Thou shall not bear false witness against your neighbor. Do not lie to get someone else in trouble. Speak the truth and treat people honestly and with integrity.

You shall not covet. Coveting is an everyday part of our lives. For America, and much of the world, it is the new favorite national pastime. Marketing constantly tries to make us covet what others have so we go buy it. People go deep into debt buying things they don’t need and can’t afford (e.g. houses, cars, clothes, phones, anything and everything) because they covet. People hate others and resent others because they covet. Do not let this sin sneak into your life because it is so accepted in our culture. Look for it and ask for God’s help for you to be content rather than coveting.

Think you are scoring well? Let’s take a look at how Jesus told us to judge against these commandments.

Matthew 5:21-22, 27-28

      21“You have heard that the ancients were told, ‘YOU SHALL NOT COMMIT MURDER’ and ‘Whoever commits murder shall be liable to the court.’ 22“But I say to you that everyone who is angry with his brother shall be guilty before the court; and whoever says to his brother, ‘You good-for-nothing,’ shall be guilty before the supreme court; and whoever says, ‘You fool,’ shall be guilty enough to go into the fiery hell.

      27“You have heard that it was said, ‘YOU SHALL NOT COMMIT ADULTERY’; 28but I say to you that everyone who looks at a woman with lust for her has already committed adultery with her in his heart.

Jesus shows us how high God’s standards are. We don’t get to redefine them so they are easy just because we fail. They are the righteous standard and good reference point to measure our progress in becoming more like Christ and less like the world. It should be clear by now that we all truly need the grace of Christ’s offer of forgiveness through grace by faith based on His death on the cross for us. None of us can meet God’s holy standard.

Consider this a health check on your relationship with God and others. Do you love God with all your heart, soul, mind and strength? Do you love others as yourself? Most of us would admit we have further to go to live up to this standard… and we need God’s help to get there. Ask for Him to help you love Him more. Then look to understand more about how to demonstrate love for God through your decisions and attitudes of submission and obedience to Him.

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Do you know for sure if you will go to heaven or hell when you die? Are you experiencing in your life the peace and joy of a personal relationship with our Creator and Father? Learn more about salvation through The Message of the Cross.