Category Archives: Marriage

Consequences of Sin, Evidence in Scripture, Family, Is the Old Testament Relevant Today?, Love, Marriage, Praise / Worship / Glorify God, Thankfulness

The Lord Saw That Leah Was Unloved

Genesis 29:31-35 continues after Jacob has just been deceived by Laban in order to trick Jacob into marrying his older daughter Leah, instead of Rachel, whom Jacob wanted. Jacob then married both, but did not love Leah.

God loved Leah and had compassion on her while she was unloved by her husband. He grants children to her, but withholds children from her sister, Rachel. Scripture shares with us a very sad situation that resulted from the sin of Laban and Jacob and then impacts Leah and Rachel as well. Laban was wrong to trick Jacob into marrying Leah and Jacob was wrong for not loving her once he was married to her. Love is not a “warm, fuzzy feeling” born solely out of emotion. Emotions come and go. Love is best defined in 1 Corinthians 13, which we will get to further in today’s reading.

Genesis 29:31-35

31 When the Lord saw that Leah was unloved, he enabled her to have children, but Rachel could not conceive. 32 So Leah became pregnant and gave birth to a son. She named him Reuben,[b] for she said, “The Lord has noticed my misery, and now my husband will love me.”

33 She soon became pregnant again and gave birth to another son. She named him Simeon,[c] for she said, “The Lord heard that I was unloved and has given me another son.”

34 Then she became pregnant a third time and gave birth to another son. He was named Levi,[d] for she said, “Surely this time my husband will feel affection for me, since I have given him three sons!”

35 Once again Leah became pregnant and gave birth to another son. She named him Judah,[e] for she said, “Now I will praise the Lord!” And then she stopped having children.

We should take time to give Leah her due credit. When she was given the gift of children, she gave thanks and praise to God for it. How hard it must have been for her to know she was not loved by her husband.  There is no mention of her complaining to God that her husband did not love her, just thanking Him for the gift of children.

Jacob having accepted Leah as his wife, should have shown love to her. Remember… love is not an emotion and is not triggered by hormones. Love is best demonstrated by God’s love for us, which led Him to come down to live among us as Jesus and to suffer and die for us… despite the wickedness of our hearts and our sinful nature. He made a way for us to be reconciled with Him after we rebelled against Him, choosing sin instead of following God’s commands.

Paul summarizes love well in 1 Corinthians 13:4-7.

4 Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous or boastful or proud 5 or rude. It does not demand its own way. It is not irritable, and it keeps no record of being wronged. 6 It does not rejoice about injustice but rejoices whenever the truth wins out. 7 Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance.

Learning to love others this way is difficult for man. We are inherently sinful and selfish. Never the less, God calls us to show love for others in this way whether they are our spouses, children, or others we interact with in our daily lives.  As we strive to show others this love, we can remember that is the type of love for which Jesus died for us.

As a bit of a side note, we once again see the failure of those recorded in the Bible as the fathers of our faith. The Bible does not only record successes. What glorious evidence to the truth of the gospel. If it were “made up” or “fiction” the writers would certainly just show these founders as godly and minimize their mistakes. God reveals to us the failures and successes so we can learn from both.

This scripture is as relevant today as when it was first written. Please take time to reflect on how to apply it in your life. Pray the Holy Spirit would convict you and guide you to where you need to make changes in how you treat others around you.

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Have you submitted your life to Jesus Christ? If you die today, do you know for sure that you would be with God in heaven? Learn more about salvation through The Message of the Cross.

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Consequences of Sin, Family, Lying / Deceiving, Marriage, Murder

Deception From Within The Family

Genesis 29:15-30 continues leading us on a journey with Jacob whereby in fleeing from his past mistakes and their destructive impact on his family, Jacob met God personally on the way to find his uncle Laban. Jacob pledged to follow God. We see in this passage that Jacob is going to experience seemingly unthinkable deception at the hands of his own family. Yet one hopes God can use this deception to teach Jacob a lesson about his own deception and trickery which he played out on his father Isaac to receive the blessing Isaac intended for Esau.

After Jacob had stayed with Laban for about a month, 15 Laban said to him, “You shouldn’t work for me without pay just because we are relatives. Tell me how much your wages should be.”

16 Now Laban had two daughters. The older daughter was named Leah, and the younger one was Rachel. 17 There was no sparkle in Leah’s eyes,[a] but Rachel had a beautiful figure and a lovely face. 18 Since Jacob was in love with Rachel, he told her father, “I’ll work for you for seven years if you’ll give me Rachel, your younger daughter, as my wife.”

19 “Agreed!” Laban replied. “I’d rather give her to you than to anyone else. Stay and work with me.” 20 So Jacob worked seven years to pay for Rachel. But his love for her was so strong that it seemed to him but a few days.

21 Finally, the time came for him to marry her. “I have fulfilled my agreement,” Jacob said to Laban. “Now give me my wife so I can sleep with her.”

22 So Laban invited everyone in the neighborhood and prepared a wedding feast. 23 But that night, when it was dark, Laban took Leah to Jacob, and he slept with her. 24 (Laban had given Leah a servant, Zilpah, to be her maid.)

25 But when Jacob woke up in the morning—it was Leah! “What have you done to me?” Jacob raged at Laban. “I worked seven years for Rachel! Why have you tricked me?”

26 “It’s not our custom here to marry off a younger daughter ahead of the firstborn,” Laban replied. 27 “But wait until the bridal week is over; then we’ll give you Rachel, too—provided you promise to work another seven years for me.”

28 So Jacob agreed to work seven more years. A week after Jacob had married Leah, Laban gave him Rachel, too. 29 (Laban gave Rachel a servant, Bilhah, to be her maid.) 30 So Jacob slept with Rachel, too, and he loved her much more than Leah. He then stayed and worked for Laban the additional seven years.

If it was Laban’s intent solely to marry his daughter Leah or get more work from Jacob, then he succeeded. However, he was wrong to do it this way, with deception and trickery. Laban essentially placed Leah in the care of a husband who did not love her and was not interested in her. This caused problems for her, and for Rebekah, as we will see in our next lesson as we read on in Chapter 29.

One hopes that Jacob is able to learn from this incident that how he deceived his father, Isaac, was wrong and hurtful. Jacob handled the situation much better than Esau. Jacob did not plot revenge by killing or hurting Laban despite being angry as Esau had plotted to kill Jacob in anger.

I am often reminded as I read through scripture that whatever family problems we see in our society around us today are not new and unique. Mankind is inherently selfish and sinful and brings much suffering and wickedness into the world, even amongst family. Man has not changed in thousands of years, just our surroundings like home, tools, clothing.

None of us are ‘good enough’ to meet God’s standard. I am grateful that God came in the person of Jesus Christ to die for my sins. He paid a debt that I could not. I accept Him as my lord and savior. I repent (e.g. turn away from) my sins and submit to Him. Through the grace of God I am saved by faith. Praise God for the depths of His love for us!

If you have accepted Christ as your savior, please take time to thank Him and praise Him. Submit to Him and turn from your sins daily. Change your life to reflect His instruction instead of the world’s.

If you have never accepted Christ as your savior, please do so now. It is not about the words or a one time action, but rather a genuine repentance of the heart and submission to God. Accept that He died for your sins, was buried, and rose again. Submit to and follow Him. Ask Him into your life as Lord.

If you have any questions or want to pray with someone, please reach out to us at our Contact Us page invite us to pray with you or provide you with more information.

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Have you submitted your life to Jesus Christ? If you die today, do you know for sure that you would be with God in heaven? Learn more about salvation through The Message of the Cross.

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Homosexual Behavior, Marriage, Miracles, Wickedness / Evil

Let No One Split Apart What God Has Joined Together

As Jesus is teaching and healing in the presence of large crowds of public witnesses it must have surely been a dramatic sight. People being healed, family and friends cheering on in amazement and praising God. This must surely have been an exciting scene in Matthew 19:1-12. Yet the Pharisees walk past all of this in an effort to trap Jesus. Jesus, undeterred, uses this as an opportunity to speak clearly about marriage and divorce.

19 When Jesus had finished saying these things, he left Galilee and went down to the region of Judea east of the Jordan River. 2 Large crowds followed him there, and he healed their sick.

3 Some Pharisees came and tried to trap him with this question: “Should a man be allowed to divorce his wife for just any reason?”

4 “Haven’t you read the Scriptures?” Jesus replied. “They record that from the beginning ‘God made them male and female.’[a]” 5 And he said, “‘This explains why a man leaves his father and mother and is joined to his wife, and the two are united into one.’[b] 6 Since they are no longer two but one, let no one split apart what God has joined together.”

7 “Then why did Moses say in the law that a man could give his wife a written notice of divorce and send her away?”[c] they asked.

8 Jesus replied, “Moses permitted divorce only as a concession to your hard hearts, but it was not what God had originally intended. 9 And I tell you this, whoever divorces his wife and marries someone else commits adultery—unless his wife has been unfaithful.[d]”

10 Jesus’ disciples then said to him, “If this is the case, it is better not to marry!”

11 “Not everyone can accept this statement,” Jesus said. “Only those whom God helps. 12 Some are born as eunuchs, some have been made eunuchs by others, and some choose not to marry[e] for the sake of the Kingdom of Heaven. Let anyone accept this who can.”

It almost seems routine that Jesus healed the sick in front of large crowds. It is mentioned almost in passing as we begin this scripture. But we must be careful never to take that for granted. He performed those signs to demonstrate His authority as God to heal people physically and spiritually (through forgiveness of sins for those who repent).

The scene is set… large crowds hearing Jesus teach and witnessing miracles of healing publically with many witnesses… and the Pharisees, religious leaders, can only think about trapping Jesus. They are blind to His truth because they already decided that they do not want to give up their power, authority, and influence. They seem blinded by their own wickedness. They are certainly not submitted to God.

Jesus takes the opportunity to clearly teach about marriage and divorce. With great clarity, Jesus points to the scriptures as authoritative and specifically points to marriage being between one man and one woman.  Homosexual “marriage” is clearly omitted because it is wrong and not God’s plan. Additionally, God clearly speaks that a man is  joined to his “wife”, not his “wives”.

Once a husband and wife are joined by God in marriage, God intends for them to stay together and seek and submit to God and each other through good times and difficult times. They are to separate  from mother and father and join to each other as the primary relationship in their lives, behind only their individual relationships with God for priority. The two become one and should not be separated.

Because of the wickedness and hardness of our hearts, God does allow divorce in some instances. It is not His plan for married couples to seek divorce, but rather a disappointing outcome driven by wickedness and selfishness, which at times creates a dangerous or harmful situation. We should never take divorce lightly and should always seek God’s help to reconcile and confirm before going down that path. It is better not to marry, than to marry and divorce.

For those of us who have experienced divorce or know those who have, there is forgiveness and grace for those who submit to God and repent from our sins. We should be careful not to rationalize divorce in a way that vindicates any involved are faultless. Those who develop an intimate relationship with God, study His scripture and apply it to their lives, submit to Him and prayerfully ask for His guidance… will be much more successful in choosing a godly spouse and living out a godly marriage that requires each of us to change and move away from our sinful and selfish desires and submit to God and our spouse. If two are truly submitted to God, difficulties in marriage can be addressed and overcome to the glory of God.

Instead, when we find ourselves in divorce, we must turn with genuine repentance before God and seek His forgiveness and grace. Jesus already died for our sins. His blood pays for our mistakes. Accept His grace and seek greater relationship with Him to avoid repeating the same sin again.

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Have you submitted your life to Jesus Christ? If you die today, do you know for sure that you would be with God in heaven? Learn more about salvation through The Message of the Cross.

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Consequences of Sin, Evidence in Scripture, Family, Marriage, Parenting

Even Those With God’s Blessing Have Consequences For Their Mistakes

After Rebekah helps Jacob deceive Isaac so that Jacob can receive God’s blessing, the family is basically breaking apart. Isaac is very old and in declining physical health. Rebekah and Isaac have raised their boys with each having clear favorites. Lack of wisdom in selection of ungodly wives for Esau has made the situation worse within the family. Esau is planning to kill Jacob and Rebekah is now planning how to rescue Jacob by sending him away. By the end of this scripture Esau also chooses to leave. Sounds like a soap opera or dramatic television show, but actually it is the subject of historical events as documented in scripture.

Genesis 27:46-Genesis 28:1-9

46 Then Rebekah said to Isaac, “I’m sick and tired of these local Hittite women! I would rather die than see Jacob marry one of them.”

28 So Isaac called for Jacob, blessed him, and said, “You must not marry any of these Canaanite women. 2 Instead, go at once to Paddan-aram, to the house of your grandfather Bethuel, and marry one of your uncle Laban’s daughters. 3 May God Almighty[a] bless you and give you many children. And may your descendants multiply and become many nations! 4 May God pass on to you and your descendants[b] the blessings he promised to Abraham. May you own this land where you are now living as a foreigner, for God gave this land to Abraham.”

5 So Isaac sent Jacob away, and he went to Paddan-aram to stay with his uncle Laban, his mother’s brother, the son of Bethuel the Aramean.

6 Esau knew that his father, Isaac, had blessed Jacob and sent him to Paddan-aram to find a wife, and that he had warned Jacob, “You must not marry a Canaanite woman.” 7 He also knew that Jacob had obeyed his parents and gone to Paddan-aram. 8 It was now very clear to Esau that his father did not like the local Canaanite women. 9 So Esau visited his uncle Ishmael’s family and married one of Ishmael’s daughters, in addition to the wives he already had. His new wife’s name was Mahalath. She was the sister of Nebaioth and the daughter of Ishmael, Abraham’s son.

First I would observe that many look to the early figures in our faith such as Abraham, Isaac, Jacob, etc. with great respect. If someone was just making up the whole story or intentionally altering history, they would certainly omit or clean up the messes like the one we are reading about in Genesis with Isaac’s family. They would easily have omitted them. However, they did not. The fact that even the mistakes and embarrassment of the elders of God’s people are recorded in detail is compelling evidence that the Bible is an accurate historical document for those parts of the scripture that were written to be taken literally.

Rebekah apparently learned her lesson in the importance of selecting the proper wife based in part her faith and relationship with God. It is disappointing that they could not help Esau avoid pagan wives. Now after seeing that it does not end well (sorry Esau, too late for you), she is going to take a better approach for Jacob. It is good that she learned from the situation with Esau, but how much better to have learned and applied the lesson of Abraham when he sent his servant to find a wife for Isaac… and found Rebekah! The parents had already lived through this issue personally and still the family failed in this area.

The sins of the parents in this case led to failure within the family structure. Scripture shows that Isaac and Rebekah did not work together and guide their family to love and respect one another, working as a team to serve God and the family. Instead they each gravitated toward favorites and created the roots of bitterness. Then Rebekah made it worse by plotting and scheming against her own husband. Perhaps she could have tried talking to him instead about the issues about which she was concerned?

Each of us should reflect on the errors made by Isaac, Rebekah, Jacob, and Esau. What should they have done differently in each situation? How can we apply those learnings to our family lives?

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Blessed, Consequences of Sin, Disobeying, Rebelling Against, Ignoring God, Family, Greed, Lying / Deceiving, Marriage, Parenting

God’s Blessing Passed to Jacob By Deception?

Genesis 27:1-45 can be difficult to fully understand when you first read it. We must wrestle with issues such as “Why does God allow Isaac’s blessing to go to Jacob through deception and trickery?”

To understand the context properly we should remember what we read in Genesis 25. Esau showed contempt for his rights as first born and traded them willingly to Jacob for a bowl of stew. Then in Genesis 26, Esau continues straying from God by marrying two Hittite wives. The Hittite people had detestable practices involved in their pagan worship. It would appear that Esau rejected God willingly and thus in that context it becomes easier to understand why God passed the blessing on to Jacob.

27 One day when Isaac was old and turning blind, he called for Esau, his older son, and said, “My son.”

“Yes, Father?” Esau replied.

2 “I am an old man now,” Isaac said, “and I don’t know when I may die. 3 Take your bow and a quiver full of arrows, and go out into the open country to hunt some wild game for me. 4 Prepare my favorite dish, and bring it here for me to eat. Then I will pronounce the blessing that belongs to you, my firstborn son, before I die.”

5 But Rebekah overheard what Isaac had said to his son Esau. So when Esau left to hunt for the wild game, 6 she said to her son Jacob, “Listen. I overheard your father say to Esau, 7 ‘Bring me some wild game and prepare me a delicious meal. Then I will bless you in the Lord’s presence before I die.’ 8 Now, my son, listen to me. Do exactly as I tell you. 9 Go out to the flocks, and bring me two fine young goats. I’ll use them to prepare your father’s favorite dish. 10 Then take the food to your father so he can eat it and bless you before he dies.”

11 “But look,” Jacob replied to Rebekah, “my brother, Esau, is a hairy man, and my skin is smooth. 12 What if my father touches me? He’ll see that I’m trying to trick him, and then he’ll curse me instead of blessing me.”

13 But his mother replied, “Then let the curse fall on me, my son! Just do what I tell you. Go out and get the goats for me!”

14 So Jacob went out and got the young goats for his mother. Rebekah took them and prepared a delicious meal, just the way Isaac liked it. 15 Then she took Esau’s favorite clothes, which were there in the house, and gave them to her younger son, Jacob. 16 She covered his arms and the smooth part of his neck with the skin of the young goats. 17 Then she gave Jacob the delicious meal, including freshly baked bread.

18 So Jacob took the food to his father. “My father?” he said.

“Yes, my son,” Isaac answered. “Who are you—Esau or Jacob?”

19 Jacob replied, “It’s Esau, your firstborn son. I’ve done as you told me. Here is the wild game. Now sit up and eat it so you can give me your blessing.”

20 Isaac asked, “How did you find it so quickly, my son?”

“The Lord your God put it in my path!” Jacob replied.

21 Then Isaac said to Jacob, “Come closer so I can touch you and make sure that you really are Esau.” 22 So Jacob went closer to his father, and Isaac touched him. “The voice is Jacob’s, but the hands are Esau’s,” Isaac said. 23 But he did not recognize Jacob, because Jacob’s hands felt hairy just like Esau’s. So Isaac prepared to bless Jacob. 24 “But are you really my son Esau?” he asked.

“Yes, I am,” Jacob replied.

25 Then Isaac said, “Now, my son, bring me the wild game. Let me eat it, and then I will give you my blessing.” So Jacob took the food to his father, and Isaac ate it. He also drank the wine that Jacob served him. 26 Then Isaac said to Jacob, “Please come a little closer and kiss me, my son.”

27 So Jacob went over and kissed him. And when Isaac caught the smell of his clothes, he was finally convinced, and he blessed his son. He said, “Ah! The smell of my son is like the smell of the outdoors, which the Lord has blessed!

28 “From the dew of heaven
    and the richness of the earth,
may God always give you abundant harvests of grain
    and bountiful new wine.
29 May many nations become your servants,
    and may they bow down to you.
May you be the master over your brothers,
    and may your mother’s sons bow down to you.
All who curse you will be cursed,
    and all who bless you will be blessed.”

30 As soon as Isaac had finished blessing Jacob, and almost before Jacob had left his father, Esau returned from his hunt. 31 Esau prepared a delicious meal and brought it to his father. Then he said, “Sit up, my father, and eat my wild game so you can give me your blessing.”

32 But Isaac asked him, “Who are you?”

Esau replied, “It’s your son, your firstborn son, Esau.”

33 Isaac began to tremble uncontrollably and said, “Then who just served me wild game? I have already eaten it, and I blessed him just before you came. And yes, that blessing must stand!”

34 When Esau heard his father’s words, he let out a loud and bitter cry. “Oh my father, what about me? Bless me, too!” he begged.

35 But Isaac said, “Your brother was here, and he tricked me. He has taken away your blessing.”

36 Esau exclaimed, “No wonder his name is Jacob, for now he has cheated me twice.[a] First he took my rights as the firstborn, and now he has stolen my blessing. Oh, haven’t you saved even one blessing for me?”

37 Isaac said to Esau, “I have made Jacob your master and have declared that all his brothers will be his servants. I have guaranteed him an abundance of grain and wine—what is left for me to give you, my son?”

38 Esau pleaded, “But do you have only one blessing? Oh my father, bless me, too!” Then Esau broke down and wept.

39 Finally, his father, Isaac, said to him,

“You will live away from the richness of the earth,
    and away from the dew of the heaven above.
40 You will live by your sword,
    and you will serve your brother.
But when you decide to break free,
    you will shake his yoke from your neck.”

41 From that time on, Esau hated Jacob because their father had given Jacob the blessing. And Esau began to scheme: “I will soon be mourning my father’s death. Then I will kill my brother, Jacob.”

42 But Rebekah heard about Esau’s plans. So she sent for Jacob and told him, “Listen, Esau is consoling himself by plotting to kill you. 43 So listen carefully, my son. Get ready and flee to my brother, Laban, in Haran. 44 Stay there with him until your brother cools off. 45 When he calms down and forgets what you have done to him, I will send for you to come back. Why should I lose both of you in one day?”

Several key points in this scripture:

  • Isaac and Rebekah had created a troubled family environment where each had a favorite rather than all working together. This approach had negative consequences.
  • Esau appears to have rejected God before losing his blessing to Jacob. Jacob does not get the blessing by “fooling God”.
  • Esau does not take responsibility for giving away his birthright but rather blames Jacob. Without accepting responsibility there can be no repentance.  In fact, Esau plots to kill Jacob.
  • Jacob receives God’s blessing, but still has to accept the consequences for his actions including breaking apart his own family to the point where his brother wants to kill him.
  • All involved in the scripture put great importance in the blessing of Isaac for His son.

As we will see tomorrow as we continue Genesis 27, the family is broken apart by this deception and infighting and Jacob leaves.

Each of us should focus on creating a loving family environment where siblings are not singled out by parents as favorites but rather all work together to serve God and the family. Respect and celebrate differences as we celebrate the body of Christ. Yes our children are different. Praise God! Each has different gifts and abilities and we can complement each other to create a family that is greater than the sum of the individuals.

Receiving blessing from God is important. Seek that humbly in prayer and submission of our will to God’s will.

Do not be emboldened to choose deception because it appears to work in Jacob’s favor to get the blessing in this scripture. God allowed the blessing of Isaac to go to Jacob.  God was not fooled. There are also consequences Jacob must face, starting with leaving his family and then in Genesis 29 Jacob is deceived by Laban in a significant manner that seems just given Jacob’s deception.

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Family, Marriage, Peace / Rest

Isaac Keeps Peace with Abimelech; Esau Marries Hittite Wives

Genesis 26:26-34 continues after Abimelech had asked Isaac to leave his land because he feared how wealthy and powerful Isaac was growing. Isaac left peacefully and resettled elsewhere. We see that Isaac, though he continues to be blessed and grow stronger, remains peaceful in his dealings with Abimelech, even entering into a treaty with Abimelech despite feeling “hated” by Abimelech.

26 One day King Abimelech came from Gerar with his adviser, Ahuzzath, and also Phicol, his army commander. 27 “Why have you come here?” Isaac asked. “You obviously hate me, since you kicked me off your land.”

28 They replied, “We can plainly see that the Lord is with you. So we want to enter into a sworn treaty with you. Let’s make a covenant. 29 Swear that you will not harm us, just as we have never troubled you. We have always treated you well, and we sent you away from us in peace. And now look how the Lord has blessed you!”

30 So Isaac prepared a covenant feast to celebrate the treaty, and they ate and drank together. 31 Early the next morning, they each took a solemn oath not to interfere with each other. Then Isaac sent them home again, and they left him in peace.

32 That very day Isaac’s servants came and told him about a new well they had dug. “We’ve found water!” they exclaimed. 33 So Isaac named the well Shibah (which means “oath”). And to this day the town that grew up there is called Beersheba (which means “well of the oath”).

34 At the age of forty, Esau married two Hittite wives: Judith, the daughter of Beeri, and Basemath, the daughter of Elon. 35 But Esau’s wives made life miserable for Isaac and Rebekah.

Isaac does not appear to hold bitterness against Abimelech, and if he does… he gets over it and is willing to interact peacefully with Abimelech. Isaac does not have a mind for revenge. He demonstrates the wisdom to avoid unnecessary aggression. In this situation, Isaac is not threatened and has no need to defend himself. Continuing in peace with Abimelech is a wise decision.

At the very end of the scripture we see quick mention of Esau marrying two Hittite wives, who then made life miserable for Isaac and Rebekah. It is a very quick mention on the surface. However, once again we see the importance of wisely selecting your spouse and the negative impacts that a poor choice can have on the family.

For background on the Hittites… their religion was a pluralistic worship of nature. They believed in various gods over the elements of earth, sky, weather, etc. As with most pagan religions, the religion of the Hittites incorporated detestable practices that were offensive to God. For the family of Isaac and Rebekah, a choice for Esau to marry Hittite wives was a very poor choice. The circumstances and reasons for why Esau married Hittite wives are not revealed in this scripture.

God warns us in scripture to marry someone who shares our faith in God. This instruction is foundational to a good marriage and essential for someone who follows God to avoid the risk of being drawn away from God toward pagan practices.

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Faith / Trusting God, Hearing from God, Marriage, Obeying God, Parenting, Prayer, Righteousness / Serving God

Abraham and His Servant Rely on God

Genesis 24 shows us what remains important to Abraham in his old age… planning for his son to have a godly bride and continuing to trust God. Abraham was focused on his son marrying someone of his own faith, instead of local women who worshipped false gods, and in trusting God’s promise that he should remain in the land that God promised to give to his descendants.  Abraham’s focus remains on serving and trusting God even as a very old man. He does not choose to stop following God’s instruction.

24 Abraham was now a very old man, and the Lord had blessed him in every way. 2 One day Abraham said to his oldest servant, the man in charge of his household, “Take an oath by putting your hand under my thigh. 3 Swear by the Lord, the God of heaven and earth, that you will not allow my son to marry one of these local Canaanite women. 4 Go instead to my homeland, to my relatives, and find a wife there for my son Isaac.”

5 The servant asked, “But what if I can’t find a young woman who is willing to travel so far from home? Should I then take Isaac there to live among your relatives in the land you came from?”

6 “No!” Abraham responded. “Be careful never to take my son there. 7 For the Lord, the God of heaven, who took me from my father’s house and my native land, solemnly promised to give this land to my descendants.[a] He will send his angel ahead of you, and he will see to it that you find a wife there for my son. 8 If she is unwilling to come back with you, then you are free from this oath of mine. But under no circumstances are you to take my son there.”

9 So the servant took an oath by putting his hand under the thigh of his master, Abraham. He swore to follow Abraham’s instructions. 10 Then he loaded ten of Abraham’s camels with all kinds of expensive gifts from his master, and he traveled to distant Aram-naharaim. There he went to the town where Abraham’s brother Nahor had settled. 11 He made the camels kneel beside a well just outside the town. It was evening, and the women were coming out to draw water.

12 “O Lord, God of my master, Abraham,” he prayed. “Please give me success today, and show unfailing love to my master, Abraham. 13 See, I am standing here beside this spring, and the young women of the town are coming out to draw water. 14 This is my request. I will ask one of them, ‘Please give me a drink from your jug.’ If she says, ‘Yes, have a drink, and I will water your camels, too!’—let her be the one you have selected as Isaac’s wife. This is how I will know that you have shown unfailing love to my master.”

15 Before he had finished praying, he saw a young woman named Rebekah coming out with her water jug on her shoulder. She was the daughter of Bethuel, who was the son of Abraham’s brother Nahor and his wife, Milcah. 16 Rebekah was very beautiful and old enough to be married, but she was still a virgin. She went down to the spring, filled her jug, and came up again. 17 Running over to her, the servant said, “Please give me a little drink of water from your jug.”

18 “Yes, my lord,” she answered, “have a drink.” And she quickly lowered her jug from her shoulder and gave him a drink. 19 When she had given him a drink, she said, “I’ll draw water for your camels, too, until they have had enough to drink.” 20 So she quickly emptied her jug into the watering trough and ran back to the well to draw water for all his camels.

21 The servant watched her in silence, wondering whether or not the Lord had given him success in his mission. 22 Then at last, when the camels had finished drinking, he took out a gold ring for her nose and two large gold bracelets[b] for her wrists.

23 “Whose daughter are you?” he asked. “And please tell me, would your father have any room to put us up for the night?”

24 “I am the daughter of Bethuel,” she replied. “My grandparents are Nahor and Milcah. 25 Yes, we have plenty of straw and feed for the camels, and we have room for guests.”

26 The man bowed low and worshiped the Lord. 27 “Praise the Lord, the God of my master, Abraham,” he said. “The Lord has shown unfailing love and faithfulness to my master, for he has led me straight to my master’s relatives.”

28 The young woman ran home to tell her family everything that had happened. 29 Now Rebekah had a brother named Laban, who ran out to meet the man at the spring. 30 He had seen the nose-ring and the bracelets on his sister’s wrists, and had heard Rebekah tell what the man had said. So he rushed out to the spring, where the man was still standing beside his camels. 31 Laban said to him, “Come and stay with us, you who are blessed by the Lord! Why are you standing here outside the town when I have a room all ready for you and a place prepared for the camels?”

32 So the man went home with Laban, and Laban unloaded the camels, gave him straw for their bedding, fed them, and provided water for the man and the camel drivers to wash their feet. 33 Then food was served. But Abraham’s servant said, “I don’t want to eat until I have told you why I have come.”

“All right,” Laban said, “tell us.”

34 “I am Abraham’s servant,” he explained. 35 “And the Lord has greatly blessed my master; he has become a wealthy man. The Lord has given him flocks of sheep and goats, herds of cattle, a fortune in silver and gold, and many male and female servants and camels and donkeys.

36 “When Sarah, my master’s wife, was very old, she gave birth to my master’s son, and my master has given him everything he owns. 37 And my master made me take an oath. He said, ‘Do not allow my son to marry one of these local Canaanite women. 38 Go instead to my father’s house, to my relatives, and find a wife there for my son.’

39 “But I said to my master, ‘What if I can’t find a young woman who is willing to go back with me?’ 40 He responded, ‘The Lord, in whose presence I have lived, will send his angel with you and will make your mission successful. Yes, you must find a wife for my son from among my relatives, from my father’s family. 41 Then you will have fulfilled your obligation. But if you go to my relatives and they refuse to let her go with you, you will be free from my oath.’

42 “So today when I came to the spring, I prayed this prayer: ‘O Lord, God of my master, Abraham, please give me success on this mission. 43 See, I am standing here beside this spring. This is my request. When a young woman comes to draw water, I will say to her, “Please give me a little drink of water from your jug.” 44 If she says, “Yes, have a drink, and I will draw water for your camels, too,” let her be the one you have selected to be the wife of my master’s son.’

45 “Before I had finished praying in my heart, I saw Rebekah coming out with her water jug on her shoulder. She went down to the spring and drew water. So I said to her, ‘Please give me a drink.’ 46 She quickly lowered her jug from her shoulder and said, ‘Yes, have a drink, and I will water your camels, too!’ So I drank, and then she watered the camels.

47 “Then I asked, ‘Whose daughter are you?’ She replied, ‘I am the daughter of Bethuel, and my grandparents are Nahor and Milcah.’ So I put the ring on her nose, and the bracelets on her wrists.

48 “Then I bowed low and worshiped the Lord. I praised the Lord, the God of my master, Abraham, because he had led me straight to my master’s niece to be his son’s wife. 49 So tell me—will you or won’t you show unfailing love and faithfulness to my master? Please tell me yes or no, and then I’ll know what to do next.”

50 Then Laban and Bethuel replied, “The Lord has obviously brought you here, so there is nothing we can say. 51 Here is Rebekah; take her and go. Yes, let her be the wife of your master’s son, as the Lord has directed.”

52 When Abraham’s servant heard their answer, he bowed down to the ground and worshiped the Lord. 53 Then he brought out silver and gold jewelry and clothing and presented them to Rebekah. He also gave expensive presents to her brother and mother. 54 Then they ate their meal, and the servant and the men with him stayed there overnight.

But early the next morning, Abraham’s servant said, “Send me back to my master.”

55 “But we want Rebekah to stay with us at least ten days,” her brother and mother said. “Then she can go.”

56 But he said, “Don’t delay me. The Lord has made my mission successful; now send me back so I can return to my master.”

57 “Well,” they said, “we’ll call Rebekah and ask her what she thinks.” 58 So they called Rebekah. “Are you willing to go with this man?” they asked her.

And she replied, “Yes, I will go.”

59 So they said good-bye to Rebekah and sent her away with Abraham’s servant and his men. The woman who had been Rebekah’s childhood nurse went along with her. 60 They gave her this blessing as she parted:

“Our sister, may you become
    the mother of many millions!
May your descendants be strong
    and conquer the cities of their enemies.”

61 Then Rebekah and her servant girls mounted the camels and followed the man. So Abraham’s servant took Rebekah and went on his way.

62 Meanwhile, Isaac, whose home was in the Negev, had returned from Beer-lahai-roi. 63 One evening as he was walking and meditating in the fields, he looked up and saw the camels coming. 64 When Rebekah looked up and saw Isaac, she quickly dismounted from her camel. 65 “Who is that man walking through the fields to meet us?” she asked the servant.

And he replied, “It is my master.” So Rebekah covered her face with her veil. 66 Then the servant told Isaac everything he had done.

67 And Isaac brought Rebekah into his mother Sarah’s tent, and she became his wife. He loved her deeply, and she was a special comfort to him after the death of his mother.

A few key highlights in this important scripture we should consider applying in our own lives:

  • Even at the end of his life, Abraham, a man declared righteous because of his faith, focuses on submitting to God. He looks ahead to important things that need to be resolved before he dies. He prepares to help the next generation succeed in submitting to and serving God. There are two important aspects of this highlighted in this passage… marrying a godly woman even if it seems hard to find one and choosing to live in the land that God told him his descendants would inherit.
  • The servant prayed to God for help finding the bride for Isaac. This step is important and we should encourage everyone to submit their choice of spouse to God and ask for His help, and then wait for His answer.
  • The test that the servant uses is actually a good indicator of character. He was not only looking for water for himself, which is relatively easy, but for his camels… which is a lot of work. They drink a lot after a long journey. Note he did not ask her to water his camels, but relied on her offering.
  • The servant also recognized confirmation from God for his prayer. The timing of when Rebekah showed up, fulfillment of the original test, and then the fact that she was related to Abraham’s family… which was Abraham’s request.
  • The servant stops to worship, praise, and thank God for help.
  • When he shares his testimony with Rebekah’s family, the servant does not just say “God told me Rebekah is to be Isaac’s wife.” Instead he shares the full detail of the testimony with them… to the glory of God.

We can learn much through the life of Abraham. Yes, he made mistakes, but he was a man of great faith. Praise God we have record of His life to study and learn from. I am greatly encouraged to see how God can use us, even though we still have flaws and make mistakes.

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Character of God, Consequences of Sin, Family, Hearing from God, Marriage, Obeying God, Parenting

Abraham Seeks God For Family Troubles

Genesis 21:8-21 reminds us that there are real, tangible consequences of our mistakes but also shows us how God can help us through these difficulties.

Ishmael was the result of a poor choice made by Sarah and Abraham in an effort to “help God” fulfill His promise to provide generations of offspring through Abraham.

8 When Isaac grew up and was about to be weaned, Abraham prepared a huge feast to celebrate the occasion. 9 But Sarah saw Ishmael—the son of Abraham and her Egyptian servant Hagar—making fun of her son, Isaac.[b] 10 So she turned to Abraham and demanded, “Get rid of that slave woman and her son. He is not going to share the inheritance with my son, Isaac. I won’t have it!”

11 This upset Abraham very much because Ishmael was his son. 12 But God told Abraham, “Do not be upset over the boy and your servant. Do whatever Sarah tells you, for Isaac is the son through whom your descendants will be counted. 13 But I will also make a nation of the descendants of Hagar’s son because he is your son, too.”

14 So Abraham got up early the next morning, prepared food and a container of water, and strapped them on Hagar’s shoulders. Then he sent her away with their son, and she wandered aimlessly in the wilderness of Beersheba.

15 When the water was gone, she put the boy in the shade of a bush. 16 Then she went and sat down by herself about a hundred yards[c] away. “I don’t want to watch the boy die,” she said, as she burst into tears.

17 But God heard the boy crying, and the angel of God called to Hagar from heaven, “Hagar, what’s wrong? Do not be afraid! God has heard the boy crying as he lies there. 18 Go to him and comfort him, for I will make a great nation from his descendants.”

19 Then God opened Hagar’s eyes, and she saw a well full of water. She quickly filled her water container and gave the boy a drink.

20 And God was with the boy as he grew up in the wilderness. He became a skillful archer, 21 and he settled in the wilderness of Paran. His mother arranged for him to marry a woman from the land of Egypt.

The mistake of Abraham having a child with Hagar, who was not his wife, had very tangible consequences for all involved. Sarah and Hagar developed division and bitterness toward one another. Abraham was forced to deal with division within his household that was very destructive and Ishmael was caught up in the middle of it all.

When Abraham was faced with solving this challenging problem, he turned to God. God, in His grace, gave specific guidance for resolution. We can have debate about what we would have told Abraham to do, but there is no debating that Abraham turned to God, God answered, and Abraham immediately obeyed.

God told Abraham that He would take care of Ishmael and He did. God also reached out to Hagar when she was crying out in need in order to comfort and encourage her and to fulfill His commitment to Abraham.

We should be encouraged that we can turn to God for help even in personal struggles or conflict within our family. He cares about each of us that much. However, when He provides a clear answer for how to resolve it… we should follow His instruction quickly.

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Please share our devotionals with your friends and family and visit our website at www.HearingFromJesus.org to see more.

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Adultery / Sex Outside Marriage, Consequences of Sin, Hebrew Roots / Commands / Law, Marriage

Let Your Wife Be a Fountain of Blessing

God uses Proverbs 5 to provide a crystal clear and stern warning for men who are in the midst of adultery or considering adultery. This scripture serves as a  warning also for immoral women who would participate in adultery. Finally, God reminds us to enjoy His gift of sex within the context of a godly marriage between a man and a woman… let your wife be a fountain of blessing to you.

5 My son, pay attention to my wisdom;
    listen carefully to my wise counsel.
2 Then you will show discernment,
    and your lips will express what you’ve learned.
3 For the lips of an immoral woman are as sweet as honey,
    and her mouth is smoother than oil.
4 But in the end she is as bitter as poison,
    as dangerous as a double-edged sword.
5 Her feet go down to death;
    her steps lead straight to the grave.[a]
6 For she cares nothing about the path to life.
    She staggers down a crooked trail and doesn’t realize it.

7 So now, my sons, listen to me.
    Never stray from what I am about to say:
8 Stay away from her!
    Don’t go near the door of her house!
9 If you do, you will lose your honor
    and will lose to merciless people all you have achieved.
10 Strangers will consume your wealth,
    and someone else will enjoy the fruit of your labor.
11 In the end you will groan in anguish
    when disease consumes your body.
12 You will say, “How I hated discipline!
    If only I had not ignored all the warnings!
13 Oh, why didn’t I listen to my teachers?
    Why didn’t I pay attention to my instructors?
14 I have come to the brink of utter ruin,
    and now I must face public disgrace.”

15 Drink water from your own well—
    share your love only with your wife.[b]
16 Why spill the water of your springs in the streets,
    having sex with just anyone?[c]
17 You should reserve it for yourselves.
    Never share it with strangers.

18 Let your wife be a fountain of blessing for you.
    Rejoice in the wife of your youth.
19 She is a loving deer, a graceful doe.
    Let her breasts satisfy you always.
    May you always be captivated by her love.
20 Why be captivated, my son, by an immoral woman,
    or fondle the breasts of a promiscuous woman?

21 For the Lord sees clearly what a man does,
    examining every path he takes.
22 An evil man is held captive by his own sins;
    they are ropes that catch and hold him.
23 He will die for lack of self-control;
    he will be lost because of his great foolishness.

Self control and discipline are essential elements for a Christian life. We must know God’s word and be prepared to follow it. We must make decisions ahead of time, before times of temptation, to decide how we will respond. Will we subject ourselves to situations that lead to temptation, or flee from temptation as Joseph did in Genesis 39:10-12.

10 She kept putting pressure on Joseph day after day, but he refused to sleep with her, and he kept out of her way as much as possible. 11 One day, however, no one else was around when he went in to do his work. 12 She came and grabbed him by his cloak, demanding, “Come on, sleep with me!” Joseph tore himself away, but he left his cloak in her hand as he ran from the house.

Joseph honored God by holding to godly wisdom and values.  He was not worried about being subtle in refusing temptation. He wanted to resist temptation and quickly. He took decisive action.

God also reminds us in Proverbs 5 that we should absolutely enjoy sex within the context of a godly marriage.  After all, God created it as a wonderful part of relationship of man and wife as the two become one.

For those of you who may be in the midst of adultery and maybe only now realize how wrong it is… stop. Stop the immoral behavior immediately. Repent of your sin before God and your spouse. Run from it and never return.

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Adultery / Sex Outside Marriage, Hebrew Roots / Commands / Law, Marriage

Seek a Godly Marriage Rather Than Divorce

Jesus speaks clearly on the covenant and commitment of marriage in Matthew 5:31-32 and Matthew 19:3-9.

[Matthew 5:31-32]  

31 “You have heard the law that says, ‘A man can divorce his wife by merely giving her a written notice of divorce.’[m] 32 But I say that a man who divorces his wife, unless she has been unfaithful, causes her to commit adultery. And anyone who marries a divorced woman also commits adultery.

[Matthew 19:3-10]

3 Some Pharisees came and tried to trap him with this question: “Should a man be allowed to divorce his wife for just any reason?”

4 “Haven’t you read the Scriptures?” Jesus replied. “They record that from the beginning ‘God made them male and female.’[a]” 5 And he said, “‘This explains why a man leaves his father and mother and is joined to his wife, and the two are united into one.’[b] 6 Since they are no longer two but one, let no one split apart what God has joined together.”

7 “Then why did Moses say in the law that a man could give his wife a written notice of divorce and send her away?”[c] they asked.

8 Jesus replied, “Moses permitted divorce only as a concession to your hard hearts, but it was not what God had originally intended. 9 And I tell you this, whoever divorces his wife and marries someone else commits adultery—unless his wife has been unfaithful.[d]”

A marriage covenant based on God’s word is to be taken very seriously. When there are difficulties, we are called to work through them in a godly way, not to harden our hearts and seek divorce.

Jesus also highlights in both scriptures how damaging adultery is to a marriage, by calling it out as an exception to His statement. Do not misunderstand this though, many who have suffered through adultery in a marriage can, with the help of Jesus, overcome that sin and betrayal and still build a godly marriage from it based out of true repentance.

The Bible provides insight in building godly marriages, even when husband and wife do not both know God equally. At www.HearingFromJesus.org, we also provide some links on our website to ministries and to resources (e.g. books, etc.) that focus on godly marriage.

One more important reminder… work proactively to build a godly marriage even before you experience trouble in your marriage.

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